My 2 cents and I'm going to tick people off

KHoerner
on 10/24/09 3:14 am, edited 10/24/09 3:16 am - Keller, TX

Hello, I am pregnant and opinionated… the pregnancy part is no excuse, I’m normally opinionated and yes, I do subscribe to the adage about opinions – but I’m passionate about a certain topic and I wanted to vent.

I get so frustrated and upset by all the “will be induced on…" “scheduling a C-section on…" posts and remarks from fellow pregnant friends. HELLO?? What is up with that? It’s not a cake that bakes at 350 for 45 minutes and it gets burnt if it’s in past the 340 year old medically accepted amount of time! If you are being induced for a medical reason and not reasons of convenience or comfort, I think that is perfectly acceptable… but if it’s the latter… WTH??

These babies are gifts from God, they have been prayed for, loved, nurtured, and cultivated for many weeks and months why is it so popular and becoming, acceptable, and sought-after to inject chemicals into our bodies that enter our bloodstream… that enter that baby’s body causing these babies to enter the world at a time when they are not ready? Has everyone read as much as you can get your hands on about induction? Have you read the pros *and* the cons? Do you know that a large number of inductions end in C-section and C-section is a MAJOR surgery? Did you know that inductions hurt worse because it is a chemical making the muscle at the top of your uterus push – but it doesn’t affect the bottom muscle and that pushing against a non-reciprocating muscle is painful? And epidurals… 94% of births at my hospital that are not c-sections use an epidural? Have you read about those, what they do to your body, breastfeeding afterwards, and what the chemicals do to your baby’s body? I just get so frustrated because this is my 8th pregnancy and only my 2nd (God willing) live birth and I do not want to be numb or absent for one second when my miracle enters this Earth. I do not want chemicals in his body, just like I didn’t want them in Paige’s body when she was born. The moment he makes his appearance can never be duplicated, no 2 humans can ever create another boy like the one I’m going to give birth to and when he arrives it will be a once in a lifetime moment – WHY would I choose to control, manipulate, and numb that?! Did it hurt with Paige? 7 hour labor, 40 minutes was uncomfortable, but I’ve felt worse… why was it not so bad? Because I didn’t believe that it had to be, I believed with all my heart that my body was designed to do this, that her entrance was going to be joyous, that I wanted to circumvent post partum depression by not pumping my body with chemicals, that my chosen method that I *practiced* with, (Hypnobirthing) would work for this type “A" control freak who can’t even relax at a spa… I had complete faith… and she came, and it was beautiful, and I felt her every second as she entered this world, and no one can take that away from me, and I WALKED to my hospital room 20 minutes after I gave birth.

I’m not pushing things on anyone – it’s your own personal preferences… but I urge you to get educated and not accept all the horror stories you hear, all the scenes in movies, and that extra $3K the hospital can tack on for an epidural and $1400 they can add for induction. It’s your baby, it’s your body, it’s your choice… it’s your once in a lifetime experience.

Thanks for letting me vent :)

~Kim

Lexa321
on 10/24/09 3:24 am - weston, FL
amen!
xraycj
on 10/24/09 3:42 am - Bayonne, NJ
Kim,

You are entitled to your opinion and I respect that.  However, with that being said please don't make me feel guilt for having a C-Section.  That I took the easy way out.  Believe me, I am educated and I work in the health care profession.  I am brave but not brave enough to give birth to triplets all natural.  I put the health of my babies first and it was healthiest to them to be in a relatively controlled environment with all the pertinent people that needed to be there i.e. resp therapist, ped, nenonatiologist, residents, nurses etc in the event that their was an issue with any of them.  I didnt need the chaos if I tried giving all natural a chance and something could have gone drastically wrong.  Having staff like...about 30 people for my csection is not something that can be gathered up quickly @ 3am if I tried to go natural.  Did I miss out on an experience, NO!  As soon as those babies were taken out they brought them right up to my face so that I could smother them with kisses!  I DID what was right for my babies and don't regret a thing.

I believe that this is a personal choice and you have a right to your opinion but please don't judge me as I did what was right for the safety of my children.  I feel like you make it seem that I didn't do any work....let me tell you carrying triplets for 33 weeks is NO EASY feet.  I commend every woman out there who gives birth....WHICH EVER METHOD THEY CHOOSE!

And as soon as my spinal wore off I walked into the NICU to see my babies.  Many of the other mothers just sat in their rooms and had their NON-NICU babies wheeled into them.  I on the other hand had to go to another floor to see mine.  Whether they had natural or CS I don't know...but out of about 55 maternity rooms that were filled it was me and another CSection woman walking the halls.

Please know that I am not attacking you but your post just rubbed me the wrong way.  I am proud that my children are safe and that should be everyones main concern.

As for the drugs they administer....well if it wasn't safe they wouldn't be giving it to us.  Let me ask you this....Have you stayed away from all the things they tell you not to do while pregnant:

no caffeine, no tuna, no heavy lifting, no hot baths, and the list goes on and on....if you can't honestly say no to EACH and EVERY one of the Don't then you too have added some kinda of stress to your baby.

With all that being said....I wish you a very safe and painless deli every.

Carroll
Purple ribbonFor Kelly....and many others out there!!!!!
KHoerner
on 10/24/09 4:04 am - Keller, TX
Carroll,

I just got out of a hot bath and finished off 2 pieces of lunch meat and plan to go eat su****onight. That being said I did post that if you are doing it for medical reasons I agree -- and I would think that triplets is a medical reason. And I do research and make the best choices for me - my bath was 8 minutes at 100 degrees (yes I take the temp), my lunch meat is injected with no hormones and chemicals - I chose the expensive stuff, and we only eat sushi at top notch places and I limit myself when I'm there.

I didn't think my post should make people feel guilty - you can't MAKE people feel guilty if they do maybe they should examine things a bit, my post was my opinion, as I stated.

You can do research on the drugs you're injected with and find reasons, justifications, and explanations about using them or being opposed to them - as you can with just about anything. I have read extensively about the drugs, both sides, and my choice is not to put them in my body... they tell us not to eat lunch meat... I doubt a controlled substance injected into your bloodstream is on the same level - but that, again, is my opinion.

My closest friend just had her 3rd C-section - and they worked for her, I know it's not an "easy" choice. That's a really tough road and I hope not to have to get one. I supported her, kept my opinions to myself and life went on. This is a bulletin board, and the reason it's here is so we can come and vent, share, learn, make friends, and meet people who are going through a similar experience - we're not always going to agree, and I'm sorry you were rubbed the wrong way - as I stated it's a subject that I am passionate about and I felt lead to post on. If 1 person reconsiders what is considered status quo in birthing and perhaps realizes that it doesn't hurt as bad as she was told, if one person can experience birth on the level that I did and feel as proud of her choices as I did - then I'm good with that. I'm NOT saying you aren't proud - you didn't do a good job, and your choices weren't educated - I commend you... triplets... no way for me - you need a hero's badge.
mrsmyranow
on 10/24/09 5:05 am - Pasadena, CA
Kim,

I like you and please don't think this the wrong way but you said you are frustrated that people have c-sections scheduled for example... Short of me having my baby at my house, I have no choice but to have a 2nd child by c-section.  Hospitals have banded together to not allow v-bacs.  Docs can't get coverage for performing v-bacs.

Most people don't get to choose whether or not they are having a c-section or induction.  I begged for an induction and didn't get one.  LOL.  Finally I was induced after my water broke and no contractions happened.   Then, after 2 days of labor, my daughter wa born via c-section. 

You have to let people live and let live.  Some people use pain relief because if they encounter too much pain they will be too exhausted to bond with their baby when born.  Some people can't handle a lot of chaos so they get some sedation. 

Everybody is different.  I think the kind of people who want to go natural, do.  It is sometimes not about inner strength but about how your body is wired for pain and your threshold for other social and medical issues.

DH and I struggle with knowing that as much as we want a VBAC for future babies, it may not be in the cards. 

Anyway, I hope you didn't take this the wrong way.  I am not trying to insult you.  There is a birth plan for every person is all.

Myra

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
baby development
KHoerner
on 10/24/09 5:17 am - Keller, TX
I didn't take it the wrong way at all -- but again... goes back to the medically necessary thing.

My whole point is people who are new to pregnancy, don't know much, and just accept that induction is status quo and scheduling a major surgery is easier than ordering at Starbucks is frustrating. When I first got preg with Paige I wanted to schedule a C-section... I'm type A - that made sense to me, but I stumbled upon an article in Pregnancy mag and started reading all I could get my hands on about other methods. I just want women to know that just because the majority of births use epidural and the majority of Dr's are willing to schedule induction after 38 weeks -- it doesn't have to be that way. It doesn't have to hurt. I am 100% open and willing to having an epidural if I am close to an "8" on the pain scale -- but I don't plan on it. I just wanted to say - it doesn't have to be a horrible experience that requires numbing before the most precious gift is placed in your arms.
lilchickad
on 10/24/09 5:59 am - Bonney Lake, WA
 You know Kim, I have to admit I have had many of the same sentiments as you, in watching how doctors have changed over the past few years as far as just being willing to schedule C-sections and inductions for no particular reason.  I was always lead to believe that a C-section is for an emergency, but it seems to have become more of an "option" as a way to give birth.  I had all of my children except for the last completely natural.  I guess I was able to deal with child birth because I knew the pain was temporary.  That being said, my deliveries were induced, but I was induced due to a lazy uterus that would not continue to contract...it would take weeks for me to get to a "4", so my doc would give up and say...okay lets induced.  I had all but 2 of my children on their due dates.  I think there are other factors for epidurals...your delivery and mine were relatively short.  Some of these women are laboring for 24+ hours...when my son was born  9 weeks premature and had to be induced due to HELLP syndrome, after hour 20 I was BEGGING for an epidural.  I got one too, and I have to admit I thought "why the hell did I not have this with every other birth"...LOL  

I certainly do not disagree with your opinions, but for some women it is not as black and white as it is for others.  I agree with the PP that it is all in your make-up..some people are just not made to give birth naturally...I dont think this makes them a bad mother (and you certainly did not indicate that either)...it is just that they have a different make-up than me.  

I do wish the docs were a little more conservative with c-sections and inductions, but as medicine evolves and more things are developed,, I do not see that happening.  I think it is simply the day and age we live in of immediate gratification, no pain, convenience, etc.  

Okay, I will stop rambling...anyway..good post for a good debatable topic.  I guess I am wishy-washy on the subject.  All I know is my experiences..I sure can't voice for others.

Laura
KHoerner
on 10/24/09 6:11 am - Keller, TX
Love your post - great points - thanks.

I am blessed to have had a short labor and of course, I'd like to think that it's because I plan, take Hypnobirthing classes, and practice relaxation techniques to help -- but if this birth goes as I wi**** to and as I envision it going, I'll never know THANK GOD the agony of the many many hour labor.

Mandy_
on 10/24/09 5:32 am, edited 10/24/09 5:34 am - cincinnati, OH
if a woman decides when she hits a 4 on the pain scale (or whatever number floats her boat) that she wants an epidural, what is it to you?  why do you care so much? its HER birth experience.

I was induced (because I asked to be) when I was 4 days overdue with my son.  I broke down and had an epidural when I hit 5 centimeters and guess what?  my labor progressed so fast after that because my body was finally able to relax and let itself work.  I'm convinced my 10 hour induced labor would have been at least twice that without my epidural.

I had a scheduled csection with my daughter at 38 weeks 5 days because of concerns about her shoulder size.  while they were large I might have been able to pass her through on my own.  was that a risk I was willing to take?  no way.  not after 3 doctors and 4 nurses told me about shoulder dysplasia etc and the issues she could potentially have.  she is here and healthy and can lift her arms over her head. the recovery from my csection was 1 million times easier than my vaginal delivery.  I had no complications from either delivery.

now this pregnancy...my ob practice is in complete support of a vbac but guess what?  I scheduled a csection for 39 weeks 3 days anyway....why?  because I'm in school and my husband is in the army.  He was able to ask for all his leave months in advance and is now going to be able to take a full 27 days off to be with us.  I'll be able to have 3 full weeks off before classes start and that had a TON to do with my choice.

I may go into labor on my own PRIOR to the 14th of Dec and if I do, I may still look into a vbac but I might not.

what I, SuzieQ, MIss daisy or anyone else decide to do with our bodies, our babies and OUR birth experiences really shouldn't be anyone else's concern. 

good for you on your choices.  I am happy that they've worked out so well for you and all that.  but your choices are not mine...nor should they have to be.

I've never had a doctor that would induce before your due date and woudln't do a csection unless there was a medical reason so those are choices I wouldn't have been able to make had I wanted them anyway.

Mandy, Mom to Jordan (5), Kaida (3) and Luken (born 12/5/09) Army wife!   HW:351 / SW: 328 / CW:149/ Goal weight...what is that?

Lilypie - (Q3jk)


 

KHoerner
on 10/24/09 6:04 am - Keller, TX
Thanks for taking my post the wrong way- taking it to heart and attacking - this is exactly why I rarely come to this board. I said MANY TIMES that it was my opinion and I was never nasty. I said it was something I was passionate about.
Have you never posted your opinion on this board? If you want to reply with your opinon - great - have at it, just don't see a reaon to be mean.
I think, in some ways, it is my business because I think we, as women aren't given all the information in an unbiased way. I think Dr's and hospitals care about the bottom line and I think nurses, although most are caring, want what is easiest for them- they get to go home at the end of their shift and will never thnk about you again.
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