Update (with a slither of hope)
Hey Everyone.
First I want to say thanks for all the well wishes and prayers. Ok, well here is the update. Friday I went straight to the ER from work (had a super powered migraine) cramping, and slight spotting. This was one day before my first prenatal appointment with OB/GYN. They did a transvaginal ultrasound, took urine and blood. There was alot of waiting. The docotor came in and told me that my HCG levels were low, that the age of the embryo was determined at six weeks (which is further than I expected, a week longer) and that there was no heart beat. Told me that she detected blood, did a pelvic exam and said that my cervix was open and that the embryo was trying to expel itself. Of course at this point I was a mess. I cried like I never cried before. Next day, (few hours later, due to not getting home until 3 AM from ER) go to gynie. Had another mini breakdown. She did an transvaginal ultrasound, said that the ager of embryo they stated was incorrect and that it measured to be 4 to 5 weeks. Told me she did see blood, however this was old blood which is normal at times. Did a pelvic exam and my cervix was closed She told me that she did not detect a heart beat however, this is at times common at 4 or 5 weeks (its so early). Told me to come back Tuesday, for more blood to be drawn so that she could compare my HCG numbers to see if they were going up or declining. Told me that either way wants me to hold off until 7 weeks and get another ultrasound. I believe this is what people say is a crack in the window of hope, I dont know why I feel so gloomy. I have been an emotional reck. I do know that alot of the pregnancy symptoms gave diminished. Like, I dont wake up and want to snap off my fiancee's head. I am no longer getting drained (fatigued) during the middle of the day. I am not urinating as much. I feel that maybe they were right in the HCG levels dropping. My moms theory is that I am running off of adrenaline and anxiety which is masking the symptoms. Either way it goes I feel real f*cked up. It is an alarming thought to think that my child is inside of me dead and just sitting there. I feel it is my fault because when I initally found out I went into a slight depression and I feel this sadness carried over into my womb. I know this is probably not true but these are my true feelings. I ran errands yesterday and I swear I was surrounded by pregnant women. I cried in public (which I hate to do). I just will hold on the best I can and hope for the best
Jasmin C
First I want to say thanks for all the well wishes and prayers. Ok, well here is the update. Friday I went straight to the ER from work (had a super powered migraine) cramping, and slight spotting. This was one day before my first prenatal appointment with OB/GYN. They did a transvaginal ultrasound, took urine and blood. There was alot of waiting. The docotor came in and told me that my HCG levels were low, that the age of the embryo was determined at six weeks (which is further than I expected, a week longer) and that there was no heart beat. Told me that she detected blood, did a pelvic exam and said that my cervix was open and that the embryo was trying to expel itself. Of course at this point I was a mess. I cried like I never cried before. Next day, (few hours later, due to not getting home until 3 AM from ER) go to gynie. Had another mini breakdown. She did an transvaginal ultrasound, said that the ager of embryo they stated was incorrect and that it measured to be 4 to 5 weeks. Told me she did see blood, however this was old blood which is normal at times. Did a pelvic exam and my cervix was closed She told me that she did not detect a heart beat however, this is at times common at 4 or 5 weeks (its so early). Told me to come back Tuesday, for more blood to be drawn so that she could compare my HCG numbers to see if they were going up or declining. Told me that either way wants me to hold off until 7 weeks and get another ultrasound. I believe this is what people say is a crack in the window of hope, I dont know why I feel so gloomy. I have been an emotional reck. I do know that alot of the pregnancy symptoms gave diminished. Like, I dont wake up and want to snap off my fiancee's head. I am no longer getting drained (fatigued) during the middle of the day. I am not urinating as much. I feel that maybe they were right in the HCG levels dropping. My moms theory is that I am running off of adrenaline and anxiety which is masking the symptoms. Either way it goes I feel real f*cked up. It is an alarming thought to think that my child is inside of me dead and just sitting there. I feel it is my fault because when I initally found out I went into a slight depression and I feel this sadness carried over into my womb. I know this is probably not true but these are my true feelings. I ran errands yesterday and I swear I was surrounded by pregnant women. I cried in public (which I hate to do). I just will hold on the best I can and hope for the best
Jasmin C
Since 2/12/08. I have went from 364 to 210. Thank You RNY!
No More PCOS, had my first baby 04.24.10!
My Life is wonderfully full because of my tool! (RNY)
Carrie,
Girl, I appreciate it! I know that good news is a good thing.. the whole ER thing just kinda messed me up. My gynie made me feel much better, it is still that "in limbo feeling" so. the waiting commences. I will try my best to stay in the up and ups. The is a such thing as a miracle.. oh and I forgot, my gynie gave me a due date. May 7! I think that would be some cruel sh*t to tell someone a due date if you felt they were in a danger zone... I know I am rambling.. but thanks again VERY much.
Girl, I appreciate it! I know that good news is a good thing.. the whole ER thing just kinda messed me up. My gynie made me feel much better, it is still that "in limbo feeling" so. the waiting commences. I will try my best to stay in the up and ups. The is a such thing as a miracle.. oh and I forgot, my gynie gave me a due date. May 7! I think that would be some cruel sh*t to tell someone a due date if you felt they were in a danger zone... I know I am rambling.. but thanks again VERY much.
Since 2/12/08. I have went from 364 to 210. Thank You RNY!
No More PCOS, had my first baby 04.24.10!
My Life is wonderfully full because of my tool! (RNY)
Thanks Sassy. I am being optimistic. I am actually feeling tired again and just got a chocolate long john from dunkin' donuts (never ever wanted one of these, even before surgery ) so I am taking this as a plus I will definitely keep you guys updated!
Since 2/12/08. I have went from 364 to 210. Thank You RNY!
No More PCOS, had my first baby 04.24.10!
My Life is wonderfully full because of my tool! (RNY)
I think you have more than a slither of hope. I would listen more to your ob than the ER dr's. Your ob has more experience and knowledge of pregnancy than the ER dr's. Also, when you are only 5-6 weeks pregnant there isn't a lot of symptoms. Most really kick in around 8 weeks....so I definitely would not let that get me down.