Someone please help me, first time mom-to-be

First off I want to formally introduce myself. My name is Simone and I had gastric bypass on May 5, 2009. I started out at 260lbs and officially to date I am 199.8lbs. My surgeons goal for me is 165lb and my personal goal is 150lbs. I am a college junior studying business and law.

I went to my gyn today and she has confirmed that I am pregnant. Estimated due date April 28, 2010. She set me up for 2 first prenatal sessions. One the second week of September to confirm my expected due date and to check me out as a high risk patient and another as just a regular patient. She also reminded me to call me surgeon today and let them know that it is confirmed. She also told me not to worry too much because I am over half way to goal and she has personally seen women after this surgery get to goal and I am healthier now than I was before (so I probably wont be kept as high risk).

So I called my surgeons office 15 minutes ago and I am now hysterical and feeling even worse than I felt when I first found out. My surgeon was in a surgery so I had to speak with his PA. She had me schedule an appointment with them for Monday so they can check on me themselves. But this was only after she made me feel like I was her kid she was reprimanding. She asked me why would I even have this surgery if I intended on doing this and if now I know I have basically wasted my time having it! She made me feel like complete crap...like I planned all of this. I had no intentions of this, I am still in college and I am only 19. I wouldve asked for this right now but Ive decided to make the best of what Ive done. Now I feel like such an idiot and I've completely ruined my tool. She even asked me what I am going to do...basically asking if I was going to have an abortion; which I wouldnt as its against my religious beliefs and personal beliefs. I'm just feeling so lousy right now after feeling pretty good earlier all because of this one woman.


But the reason I was posting (I didnt mean to rant) was to ask if anyone here was considered a high-risk pregnancy? Also what does it mean if I am one?

Ugh... wth??!!  The PA you spoke to had some nerve. If she had talked to me like she did you, I would have told her to shove it! Anyway, Girl, you can't worry about what people are going to say or do. You have a growing baby inside of you and all that matters now is for you to stay healthy, eat right, and take your vitamins.

When I found out I was pregnant, I went to my surgeon one time to discuss being pregnant with them and such. They were happy for me! I wasn't even 2 years out, like they had suggested, so I was scared of what they would think of me. They did one last CBC and sent the results to my Ob/Gyn and told them that it was up to her to watch my labs, etc. and she did. I had my labs taken often and she did a wonderful job keeping on top of it. 

Anyway, your tool is still going to be a tool even after baby is born. You'll still be able to use it and what not, it may just be alittle different then now. I gained 10 lbs with my daughter, but I lost 26 lbs. practically overnight. I was considered high-risk and I think most of the women here were because of the surgery. The only point of that is to have a maternal/fetal specialist to look at the growth of the baby to make sure the baby is growing and such. We eat differently and absorb nutrients differently then "normal" people, so thats the reason for checking on the growth of the baby. I saw my maternal/fetal specialist doctor twice and all was well. My daughter was 6 lbs even though doctors said she would be closer to 7 lbs. But, nonetheless, she was healthy and beautiful and thats all that matters to me. (Now, she's eating me out of the house and up to par with other babies her age... LOL)

Hang in there Simone! Keep your head high and focused on that baby... Eat right and often, if you can and take those vitamins and you'll have a healthy baby too!


Karine
 

I'M FURIOUS FOR YOU!  What a horrible PA.... I would find a new surgeon and I would flat out tell them why and to shove it. Like you said- this was not planned.

You should write a letter to the hospital the are affiliated with... I would tell your OB and have her/him call and ***** them out for stressing you out (as if you are not stressed out enough). Just because someone has a medical degree doesn't make them better than you, or give them the right to belittle you in anyway. I think some doctors think they are gods gift to their patients...and have a serious ego problem.

Perhaps it's my pregnancy hormones but i'm ready to call this beeotch up and give her a piece of my mind.

As for being high risk... just because you had gastric bypass surgery doesn't make you high risk-- however........... you are early out... so that could be a reason they are considering making you high risk... I would embrace it- make sure everthing is ok with you and the baby.

As for school- I would stay in... talk to your spring semester teachers and ask about taking finals a little early??? You'll be soooooo close if not done with spring semester. Take a light load.. but don't quit! 

Good Luck!!! 

I dont want to stop school at all. My sis did and still hasnt gone back almost 4 years later. What I might do is take the spring semester off if I am high risk since I would have more appts at the end (and I go to school out of state..2.5 hrs from home). If I am not and I can get clearance from both doc and teachers I will just request to take finals a little early (semester ends first week of May anyway). I just fear what would happen if I went into labor in another state.

I would've jumped through the phone at that PA!!! YOU HAVE NOT RUINED YOUR TOOL. My tool is still very much in place. When you do see your surgeon you need to yell at him about that PA...because she was way out of line.....and because she didn't pay his fees for YOUR surgery.

Anyway, I was high risk with Niko because of multiple factors:

History of preeclampsia
Heart disease
history of loss


The fact that I got pregnant right after my surgery factored in a little bit, but not really.

HTH and welcome to the board!

Angie

You had been told is very important to wait at lease 18 months to get pregnant right?

Yes I had been told and yes I understand and yes I was taking necessary precautions. But this is life and mistakes happen. I did NOT plan this, ask for it to happen, or try to make it happen. I was not trying to conceive, it was an ACCIDENT. Therefore I did not need some rude stuck up PA telling me how dumb I am and how I have messed everything up. It was not her place nor was it appropriate. Beside I felt it myself so she just needed to bite her tongue and do her job that I am paying her to do; and that is not to be my MOM.

Oh sweetie!  Congratulations on such a miracle.  I too would say the PA took a double dose of her her ***** pill this morning.  How terrible!  I'm sorry she was so mean to you.

Of course you have to be extra careful with your pregnancy, but there is no way you should be made to feel bad that this is when it happened.  So, if you think about the whole God factor...does he allow children to be conceived by accident?  NO!  This tiny miracle is in the proper womb at the proper time and that's a fact.  I can't stand it when people go nuts about how we have all the choice in the world.  My first child was conceived after we were married, but we were using protection and hadn't planned it at all.  The timing wasn't perfect AT ALL.  So, my husband just had his 34th birthday and our son just turned 10!

As far as the high risk part goes, it's really just to make sure you AND the baby are going to be healthy and getting the proper nutrients during the pregnancy.  Babies are little parasites (tee hee) and they get the best of our food and all that when we're carrying them.  That could make you ultra malnutrition, if you aren't careful.  I don't think it would matter if you're 4 months out or 4 years out from WLS.  That risk is still there.  It's because you're so recent with yours that they would categorize you as high risk.

I was high risk with all 3 of my pregnancies and seeing the specialist gave me piece of mind that I was getting the best care possible.  Just listen to what they have to say and devote yourself FULLY to doing exactly what you can do to give yourself the best result with both the pregnancy and post pregnancy.

Due in April...How far along are you then?  I suppose I can do the math!

Hi Brooklyn,  I know that's not your name but it is cool to see someone from my hometown!  Love your picture.

Thank you for your words. They are estimating that I am 4 weeks and 3 days but I am having an ultrasound on the 11th of September to confirm it. But yes, I am trying to have faith in my religion and believe that God has a plan for everyone....even if its not at the time you would like it. Me and my fiance has talked about it and we've agreed to just make the best of it (hes actually excited). I just hope and pray everything will go okay.