perplexed

My hubby and I decided lastnight that we want to try for our 3rd child.  I am 7 months out and 104 lbs down.  I still have another 90 lbs to lose but I am 27 and my time is ticking.  Let me explain though before you flip out on me.  My mom started having issues with her female parts right about when she was my age.  She was having things frozen and removed and shortly after had a hysterectomy.  She will not tell me or my sister why or what was going on.  She told us to make sure we never miss an ob appointment and always have every gut feeling checked out.  I know its wrong of her not to tell us but with all the pushing and prying in the world she just won't tell us.  So with all this said I want to get my baby having out of the way.  I know that in itself sounds horrible and not heartfelt but I really am supper sensitive and I love my 2 boys.  I am just scared.  I don't want this child met with all the negitive that my other two were met with.  I mean everyone loves them now but I wasn't able to enjoy my pregnancies at all because "you can't afford to have a child" "your apartment isn't big enough" "how will you buy diapers and formula" "you have 3 choices, abort the baby or have the baby and adopt it out or keep the baby and make the biggest mistake of your life".  As you can see my family can SUCK at times of actually needing them.  SO I guess I am just looking for some friendly advice, guidance and just all in all KINDNESS.  Someone tell me it will be ok.  Someone tell me that we are making a good choice.  I think we are but I need to know what others think too.  I am trying to not care what others think but face it we all deep down really care.  We have income, we have problems (who doesn't) we are looking for a bigger home as we care for my husbands disabled sister too (she is 21 and the in laws divorced and flipped her world upside down.  No time for your daughter when you have a girlfriend OR you are whoring yourself out on the internet and moving in with guys you just met) BUT we wouldn't trade her for anything either. 

Ok I'm done now hehe

Have a good night and thank you for reading this even if you didn't reply!

Megan

First off....welcome to the board.  Second, congrats on the weight loss! 

If we all waited for the perfect time, money, house, situation, etc......no one would have kids.  Most people just make the best of it when they find out they are pregnant.  That's all you can do.

Don't let you're family be the judge of when is a good time for you to have a 3rd child.  At the end of the day, it's you and you're husband raising and supporting you're kids, not you're family.

Chin up.....you have came to a great place for support.

Good luck and best wishes!

Ash :)

Thank you Ash!  I needed to hear kindness.  I was nervous and have been hitting refresh to see what the first commentor would say.  I'm glad it wasn't mean.  I have been reading posts in here and it**** and miss.  BUT in the not so nice commentors defence the subjects they are not being kind to are HORRIBLE posts....The one I just seen that made me want to cry like a baby and throw up at the same time was the one where the man posted a story of a mother killing her baby.  I had no idea what I was opening up and my stomach is still churning.  No baby making tonight with that story in my head!

But I really love this site and the information I have gotten from here has been PRICELESS you are all great caring people that have already taught me soooo much!

UGH! Just ignore that man.

By the way, I am in Michigan too. I am assuming you are because you had Dr. Hendrick. I am in North Branch, Lapeer county.

I love Dr. Henrick he is so amazing.

I see that man deleted everything.  damage is done for those that saw it already but at least no one else has to see it.

I'm in Romulus.  About 5 miles south of the Detroit Metro Airport.  Nice to meet you !  :)

I've met him when he was with Cori. He is very handsome LOL.

I will be in Romulus on Saturday picking up my daughter from the airport. Any suggestions on a Mexican restaurant? She told me they want some American food after spending 2 months in France and then she picked Mexican.

Yes that he sure is hehe.

Mexican town in Downtown Detroit maybe?  I have no idea.  My biggest Mexican kick is taco bell so I am so wrong to be asking.  There are 2 mexican rest. on Eureka rd if you head East.  If you hit Dix/Toledo Rd you are to far but they are both on the Left hand side really close to Allen Rd.

I am going to be very plain with you and urge you to wait. Finish losing weight first before you try for another baby. I got pregnant 8 months out and still needed to lose about 70 pounds. Not only did I never lose them, I gained back over 50 pounds from my lowest. I have had to diet and exercise and I don't feel like I ever had surgery.

You have done great with your weight loss but you still have 90 pounds to go. You are still considered morbidly obese and a pregnancy might not be as enjoyable or healthy for you and your baby.

As for your mom. Maybe her problems were sexually transmitted and that is why she won't share. If your OB doesn't see a problem with your reproductive system don't go buying into trouble by assuming that you will have the same problems as your mom.

I was 35 and 38 when I delivered my last 2 children. It is 1000 times easier because we have more money, more time for them, and more wisdom from all the mistakes we made with the first batch. We couldn't have children for 12 years and I am grateful for that because we wouldn't have these 2 right now and we enjoy them so much.

Thank you very much for your insight.  I needed it

I turned 31 last week, hubby and I tried for three years to get pregnant before I decided to have this surgery and improve my chances.  I am nine months out and I have baby fever like crazy.  I am waiting because that is the right thing to do for my potential children and for my own body.  If you are seriously concerned about your future fertility ask your ob to do some hormone testing to see what your hormone levels are as well as your Antral Follicle Count which can give you a good idea of the number of eggs you have remaining.  There are things you can do proactively now to secure your future fertility that do not involve getting pregnant at this risky stage.  The two children you have deserve a healthy mother and having a pregnancy before your body is truly ready for it, is taking something away from them as well.