OT: What to do? Kinda long!

What a great opportunity!  You're young, your children are young.  Everyone will make news friends, find their niche.  Some friendships grow even stronger when miles separate them--more inclined to make an effort to stay in touch.  To have the choice of three great states, wow!  Frankly if he turns down the promotion, he may be viewed as not being a team player, not willing to go the extra mile, and therefore may not recieve another offer and could risk being laid off.

Lurker here

I live in Utah and I LOVE it!  

I have lived all over in the USA and out of country my whole entire life. My dad was in the military so we moved A LOT.

Now that being said...

Utah is a major culture shock.  We don't sell liquor (except beer) in stores. You have to do to a state run liquor store for it.

Most sundays, the sidewalks are rolled up and most Mom & Pop businesses are closed.

Most civic activities are never held on sundays or Monday nights - that's family night.

There are a lot of public places were smoking, drinking, and CURSING is not only frowned on but also against the law.  Yes, you can get a ticket for doing those things in public.

But Utah has beautiful scenery, lots of outdoor activities, the best skiing, neighbors who bring you casseroles, homemade bread, or cookies the second you sneeze, lower taxes, cheaper cost of living, and of course, the best  thing....ME! 

Congrats on DH's promotion.

Whereever you decide to move to, consider it a grand adventure!

xox
Tammy

Thanks for posting this!  That sounds like a great place!  We don't live in a super big town in Texas.  We are about 1 hr. from Dallas.  So it's an all day event to go into the city to go shopping!  We are very out door's type people.  We have 4 wheelers, a boat and my husband hunts and fishes.  My one concern is a good education for my kids.  I can adjust to about anything over time.  I just want to make sure my kids get the best opportunities. 

I wanna say he said his main work area would be highway 80 from Salt Lake City, UT to Rock Springs WY.

Thank all of you so much for the input!  I really needed that.  DH will be home in about 1 hr. so we can talk about it.  He hasn't txt'd back in this am becuase he's been in meetings all day.  So, I'll be glad to have this input in my mind once we get to sit down and lay it all out on the table.

I do support him 120%!  Lord knows I do.  He's made it possible for me to be a stay at home mom since I was pregnant with our 1st child.  That's a blessing now days.  Savannah is going to be in 1st grade this year.  So, I know she is till young enough to start over and make new friends.  Skyler will be 1 and Bryder is due in December.  I know, we would have to wait till he is born to move. 

I don't want to hold him back and I know this could be a good thing for him.  Just another step up the corporate latter.  I'd love to move to Colorado.  Even though he would be over the 3 states, he would have to live with in driving distance to his sub-office.  If I remember correctly that's in Green River, Wyoming?  Don't know anything about it.  I think I'll google it.  He said something about Salt Lake City, UT?  IDK.....I just want to live somewhere nice, with good schools for the kids.  Not the ghetto!  I guess that's what worries me about moving to a new place and town, and state!

I have seen Jackson Hole, WY on TV and it's very nice.....but I think it's a ski restort town!  Prolly to expensive for us! LOL

Thanks again.....
Ash :)

If you guys come to utah to check it out, let me would be more then happy to be your tour guide!  and feel free to ask me any questions you might have!

xox
Tammy

I moved with my husband from Texas to CO and my biggest concern was missing my family, the socialization, the support, our kids growing up with their cousins.. Well, 1 week into living in CO and i'm sold! The weather is beautiful the mountains are amazing, I talk to my family every day. They will be visiting us here and i will be visiting them in Texas. 

I feel like I have the best of both worlds here. We are far away enough to not be involved in any family drama but I still get to keep in touch with everyone and visit once in a while. Do you know how well people treat you when they haven't seen you in a while?? hehehe :D

Anyway, I love it here. Good luck with making your choice! 

Here's the thing, you are a stay at home mom.  You go where your husbands job takes him.  Sure you sit, you discuss, but at the end of the day he's the one that works. 

These days a six figure salary, while it makes for extremely comfortable living, is not what is used to be.  Especially since you have 2 kids, one on the way, and your husband has a child from a previous relationship.  College for your kids, weddings, parties, etc., none of it comes cheap.  $40K a year increase is nothing to sneeze at.  In fact, that's when you pack up shop and move. 

Now is the time to do it because your kids are young.  There are good schools and bad schools in every state.  You and and your husband are your children's ultimate educators.  So whatever the school isn't doing, you make up for it at home or make damn sure that the school starts doing a better job by being an active parent in that school district.  

And why would you need to wait until you have the baby?  My brother and then pregnant SIL packed up and moved across the country.  

Just jump in the water and start packing. 

We loved Colorado, and we stayed for a week in Jackson Hole as well. Wonderful, beautiful ............i would move in a heartbeat! Housing is very, very pricey in Colorado and in Jackson Hole. Smaller cities in Colorado where what we considered average for homes, etc....

 My Husband recently received a huge raise, and is gone 3-5 nights a week and has a apartment in South Texas,.....we go and visit and he is home 3 nights a week. I am here alone to tend to our ranch, cows, horses, you name it we have it and i handle it alone. You just do it!, lol... I stay active with friends, school and church here to keep me busy and not sitting around depressed.

Experience life hun. I would jump on it!

Girl...get to packing.

I transferred from our office in Portland, Oregon, to New York at the age of 24.  My friends (in Portland, and the new ones in NY) all asked...WHY?! Why would I move from Portland to NY?  Why not?  I was single, 24, and my work offered me a $20K bonus to do it.  I lived in NY for 8 years, go married and had a baby...then transferred to Ukraine for three years, Belgium for three years, and now Indonesia...and who knows where I'll land next (if you know, please tell me!  I am hoping to find out SOON!).

My son was starting kindergarten when we moved to Ukraine...and he was perfectly fine w/the move.  Kids as young as yours are just happy to be where mom and dad are.  They will make new friends easily (and so will you...especially if you move into the 'neighborhood' where one of your online friends here are already at!)...and as Julie said...a $40K raise is nothing to sneeze at.  As I'm sure you're more than aware, most families in the states don't even MAKE $40K a year...let a lone get it in a raise.

In addition to the other suggestions regarding looking online and finding groups to tell you about the areas and answer questions, once you've narrowed it down, contact the city chamber of commerce and ask about a relocation package...they should be able to provide information about their city, taxes, real estate companies, schools, shopping, cost of living, etc.  I'd definitely start looking now to decide where it'd be so you have time to make an educated decision rather than having to scramble at the last minute.

Ash,
You've gotten a lot of great advice and some varying degrees of tough love, which are all true too...but I thought I might give you some empathy.  I work full time, but have a home office and it doesn't matter what state i'm in...but DH just recently got an ultimatum...move with the company to GA (we're in OH) or look for a new job...  his raise was not a raise at all when you factor in cost of living...and we've had to really scramble to move in the time frame they gave us. His family is here and mine is already too far away.  Moving was a terrifying prospect that we weren't sure that we could cope with.  We had less than 3 weeks to say yes or no and then just 2-3 months to find a home, get packed and make the move. the moving package doesn't cover all of the expenses.

However, once we made the decision (Dayton is hemoraging jobs like a stuck pig and with other companies leaving/going under, there isn't much of a market for those that stay --and it is warm in the winter and the area is beautiful and...and...and...) we felt soooo much better.  Once our brains processed that we'd be moving somewhere where we don't know anyone (Except the OH Ladies LOL--- Yes Beth, I'm so greatful you'll be there!!!) we got excited and then when we realized that the housing market there allowed us to get a house when the one up here just laughed at us...we knew we'd made the right decision.  My daughter is only 2 so the hardest thing for her is leaving Aunt Kim and Mamaw...but she's going to be fine!   and so are we.  We will just need to depend on each other more and support each other more and love each other enough to get through the rough patches.

You'll see, once your brain catches up to the reality and wraps itself around your new course in life, you will love it.  For me, it isn't about a wifes duty to follow her husband or a husband's duty to provide as much as he can for his family...but about what we, as partners do to support each other.  he'd move for me, if it came to it and I will for him, as well.  Each family dynamic works differently for each couple but you'll do what is right for your family because that's what mom's do. 

best of luck!