Dr confirmed my suspicions.

Holly,

My heart breaks for you, but my blood boils at the insensitivity of your doctor.  WTF?!  I wish I had advice or expertise in this area, but I'm clueless (which you already figured out from my other posts *wink*).  All I can say is that I admire your strength and perseverance.  41 is by NO means too old and terms like "advanced maternal age" and "old eggs" are just crap, IMHO.   There are so many factors that influence the quality and quantity of eggs, and age is only one of them.   I don't know what else to say, except that I support you and I'm here for you in whatever way you need.  It's been many years since I was in the care of a Reproductive Endocrinologist, but seeking out the best one I could find is what led me to be able to conceive 2 children over the course of many years pre-op.

Hugs and healing to you my friend,

Thank you Jo.  I am assuming that the fact the drs here keep harping about my age every time this happens is because a lot of the women here tend to start having babies at 13, so at 41, I could literally be a grandmother by now.  I know that my age is working against me..but it seems it should be more working against me in just getting pregnant in the first place.  Yes, it could increase the risks of down syndome and other birth defects...but it doesn't guarantee a miscarriage every time, either.  I'm hoping that if I can find a good dr in the U.S., they may be willing to look beyond my age for other factors since they're more used to having 'older' women come in to have babies.  I did bluntly point out to this ass that I wasn't 70 years old trying to have a baby like I'd read a woman in India did...and that even at 20 years old, women give birth to babies w/birth defects...and I just got the nod. 

I have an appointment Saturday to see the 'regular' ob/gyn I go to (the one who did the iui) because I still have to have the polyp removed.  I started to have the dr I was talking to earlier this week remove it since he was already up in there...but decided to wait for the other dr just because the first one annoyed me so much.

Overall...I know I'll be OK and that it just puts me back to square one in trying to figure out what's going on.  I try to remind myself that the fact that I can get pregnant is half the battle...now the hard part is staying that way.  The dr at my work told me I need to find a team of drs - an ob/gyn, a hematologist and an endocrinologist to all work together to find out what's up.  Endocrinologists and hematologists don't exist in Indonesia, but I'd assume that the fertility clinics in the U.S. already have the teams assembled and on-site.

Holly,

I'm so sorry for what you are going through.  I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Cindy 

I am so sorry!!!

I pray you will find an answer to what is happening and a solution!

You are in my thoughts.

Cindy