8 months pp

I gained 40 pounds during my pregnancy. I got pregnant at 167 delivered at 207. I was devistated I went over 200 pounds. Initially after I had my son I lost 20 pounds and got down to 187. My son is almost 8 months old and I'm stuck at 190 pounds and fear if I don't get this figured out In going to continue to head in the wrong direction. :( I'm now realizing my real issue with food is back. I cannot trust it. My weight is beyond out of control. I try to make healthy choices but it seems as soon as I wake up in the morning it's bad choice after bad choice in excess. I keep eating because I'm upset at my original choice.i believe I eat out of boredom. I'm to the point at  190 pounds that I cannot look in the mirror. I'm thankful I'm at the end of pumping so I can indulge in diet pills and eliminating food from my life.  I did not have gastric bypass surgery 5.5 years ago to fail now. I've got to figure this out!!