dysmorphia or reality? 7 years out!!!

Hi everybody!! I had WLS June of 2011. I have been SO satisfied with my life and body and being able to do the things Ive always loved, but more comfortably and freely. Lately I have become more concerned with my appearance. And I dont like it. And its uncomfortable. Its like that bible verse about the person that goes away from the mirror and immediately forgets what they look like. I can see myself, but I think that I am losing healthy body-perspective. I am working out regularly, staying mostly to a low carb way of eating, and still grateful and relieved for the increased freedom that my VSG has given me. I really like the way my clothes fit, I love all of the clothing combinations that I can create, and can purchase now and not break the bank, but lately I have been genuinely surprised that my pants are fitting, or I will literally look in the mirror in wonder at the person staring back at me...its like there is some residual pre-WLS notch in my brain that still hasnt truly accepted where I am. And it seems to be growing.

I am extremely sensitive and aware of exposed parts of my body - my arms especially. It is way too hot to be outside in long sleeves, so I will wear tanks and short sleeves, but I am extremely uncomfortable with the way that my skin pools to the front of my arms when I bend down to pick up something in a tank top or short sleeves, and I am hyper-aware of the way that peoples eyes gravitate to my arms when they are talking to me, even when I am not bending down, or even moving my arms much. If I drop something I will hold some object in front of me, like a piece of paper or anything, so that the arm that I am not using to pick up the object can't be seen. I will hold my arms really close to my body when reaching for things so that the skin doesnt swing, which still causes peoples eyes to gravitate to my arms. If I have to reach for something, I have this super weird and super obvious way of doing it, holding my arms super close to my body as much as possible while reaching for it...it reminds me of a tyrannosaurus. When I am inside at work I don a cardigan, long sleeved shirt or wear 3/4 sleeves, no matter what. It is the only way that I can not obsess about what my arms are doing. Bottom line is that Ive developed weird habits that I feel are better than my batwings swinging freely as I perform some activity. It all adds to the discomfort.

I can honeslty & freely say that I dont resent it, but it definitely causes some unhappinees. Granted, this unhappiness is nowhere near what I felt when I was morbidly obese, still, having dealt with 'background' unhappiness before, it can be very unhealthy for me, and compound, and lead to full on depression. I know that I will have to do something about this, one way or another. Because of WLS and a rotator cuff repair, I know that my body scars easily, and I have accepted that it is simply the way that my body heals and there is nothing that I can do about it. But I can do something about this extra skin and fat.

Does anyone else feel like this right now? What do you tell yourself to get through it?

I can definitely relate. My arms and legs bother me but I know it's mostly my thinking and perspective, as opposed to any notice by others. I still haven't worn shorts (go figure, as a bathing suit doesn't bother me at all . . .guess my love of going into the water far outweighs any stinky body image thoughts). I even have taken to only buying 3/4 sleeves (including scrubs for work).

Yes, I'd like to get my arms and legs done but have decided against it. At 60, I'm still relatively cute and I feel GREAT! For my height, I "should" weigh less but it takes a toll on my face and more stuff is loose and hanging. Sooooooooooo, I just thank the heavens that I had a vsg, I'm feeling great and I try celebrating the crepey skin (because once it was filled with ucky fat). I'm also seriously thinking of getting partial tattoo sleeve . . . .

You posted this on the plastic surgery forum so does that mean you are considering plastic surgery? Mentally the excess skin messed me up. I had to have plastic surgery to feel better and find inner peace.

Some people come to peace with their excess skin without surgery, others have to have their excess skin removed, I was a combination of both- I fixed the parts that I hated the most (breasts, abdomen, arms) and made peace with the rest (legs, face, neck). I love my body now. When I am older I will probably have a facelift, but I probably would have done that with or without weight loss surgery.

Yes I am considering plastic surgery, and have been looking at different surgeons on and off for the past few years. Other life changes have taken priority and now that life is settling down I am looking forward to this!

My WLS was about a year and a half ago, and I am scheduled for an extended tummy tuck, breast lift, and arm lift in early November 2018. I had lost weight on my own back in 2005 and knew I would have skin issues, and here we are. Last time after several consultations I allowed the cost of surgery to derail all of my efforts and instead gained the weight back because filling the skin back in was far less expensive than cutting it off. Unfortunately I wasn't thinking big picture, just had an emotional reaction to the grossness of my skin. Now I'm going to bite the bullet and cut that mess off of me, and hopefully I can live "happily ever after".

It is a horror that insurance companies don't recognize the emotional and psychological impact of significate weight-loss. I can't imagine living my life with this extra skin. I thank God that I am in a financial position to pay for this surgery out of pocket.

Good luck to you!

Hello, did you have your surgeries? How did it go? Who was your doctor and could I please see pictures? I am going to book with Dr. Sauceda for October we hope.

Tammy

Hi Tammy,

I did have my surgery! I'm very happy with the results! My surgeon was Dr. Joseph Michaels in Bethesda, MD. I can't figure out how to add a pic here, but I did upload one. Maybe you can find it somewhere in my profile? Let me know if you find it.

I found your photo by clicking on your name. WOW! Did they do that all in one surgery? What all did you have done. I can tell the arms, tummy, and breast...

How much did they charge you. Thank you

Arms, breasts, and extended tummy - all in one surgery, and paid a little more than $27k. Lord, I feel light-headed typing that!!! It's true that we pay for our overeating in SOOOO many ways... ?

Hello, I believe that what you are feeling is "normal" for what obese patients experience during their journey of massive weight loss. Everyone is different. The more we think about the things we do not like about our bodies, the more power that we give it and the more we will concentrate on it. A bad cycle if you will. I wear things over my arms almost regardless of how hot it is. I do not like my body. My ass is getting flatter and saggier with every waking day lol. However, I am 48 years old, have had my weight off for 12 or so years, and will finally have the money to fly to Dr. Sauceda this winter and have my surgery.

These are the procedures I will have. I will probably break them up into 3 surgeries.

Facelift

Lower body lift

Upper body lift

Breast reduction and lift

Arm lift

mons reduction

fat injection in my bottom

and lipo where-ever needed.

Will this make me feel better? YES!

Even if you can not afford this now, find a counselor that you work with well. Work on yourself in your heart and mind, exercise, drink lots of water, socialize with family and friends and build a strong support system. Yes, you do not like those areas of your body, right now from what you said I do not feel that you are out of the acceptable area for body issues, however, if you continue and go unchecked, this could get worse.

Take care, reach out if you want.

Tammy