I've been working with an eating disorder therapist for the last 9 months.  My sessions have dropped to about once a month.  Since my LBL is coming up on July 8th, a lot of our discussions have centered on that:  fears, expectations, logistics, etc.  

One of the things I've struggled with is that everyone (especially family) thinks I look just "fine".  They have no idea about the amount of excess skin I have camouflaged under my clothes.  The plastics guy knows, obviously, as does my husband.  But I really, really needed someone to SEE me - the real me, if you know what I mean.  

So today in therapy I asked her if I could pull out all my excess skin to just get her reaction and affirmation that I'm not just vain, that I'm not crazy and wasting good money.  She said sure (there was no disrobing required of course!).  So I stood up and pulled out the handfuls of loose skin from all around the waistband of my dress pants.  As I kept pulling and tugging and releasing all the skin her eyes got a little bigger and she said, "Wow, you really DO camouflage it well with how you dress!".  

I don't know why but it was super important for a neutral 3rd party to see this and affirm that there's good reason to want it gone.  (I don't count the surgeon as neutral because it's his job to cut and he gets paid good money to do so.)  The therapist has been working on the emotional part with me but I wanted her to see the physical part - and today she did.  An image I'm sure she won't be able to get out of her mind anytime soon - LOL!  

I plan to take lots of "before" pics so when I'm dealing with post-op issues -pain, swelling, regrets - that I can look back and remind myself how bad it REALLY was.  

I understand how you feel.

im getting my tt on Wednesday and

everone feels I don't need it but they

never seen what's under my clothes. 

I feel we work hard to loose our weight 

we deserve our plastic surgery.

I'm so glad you got this affirmation.  It sounds like you really needed it to help you over that last little bump to surgery. You deserve this and just THINK how great it's going to be!  I'm really excited for you! :) 

Hi Tracy - where did you decide to go for your PS? I am hoping to get LBL and Arms done this fall - I live in Lincoln so we are fellow Nebraskans!!

Good luck to you and I completely understand what you mean - I hide things well in clothes too -

Renee

Dr. Joseph Barnthouse in Kansas City.  

Thanks for sharing, Tracy.  I understand your desire for validation.  I am having breast reduction, and my mother and sisters just don't get that, yes, I'll look better, but the reason the surgery is medically necessary is the constant rash and oozing sores from where my large and now deflated breasts rub against my torso.  Especially in the summer when I sweat more it is sometimes awful- I have to cut up old tee shirts and wrap them under my breasts to protect my torso.  Makes me angry that I have to justify this surgery- my health insurance would never cover just cosmetic, this is medically necessary.

Good luck, and remember we are doing what we need to do to have healthy bodies- that they'll look better is just a fringe benefit.

Dee

Tracy,

I totally understand what you are saying. Good to get a 3rd opinion for your therapist. Just stay on your path and keep us posted when you actually have your surgery. I understand the healing is very painful but well worth it.

I am 60 and had a RNY 5 1/2 months ago. If I were younger, I would totally have the surgery. Good luck my pretty one.

Robin 

One of the things I've struggled with is that everyone (especially family) thinks I look just "fine".  They have no idea about the amount of excess skin I have camouflaged under my clothes.  The plastics guy knows, obviously, as does my husband"

-I totally get this. I have saggy skin around the tops of my thighs. Other areas of skin are "relaxed fit".  No one seems to understand how HARD I work to cover up those thighs. I would love to be able to wear running shorts, or any short, but end up in these hot long exercise capris.

I can squeeze two handfuls of "relaxed fit" skin. When I stand, it doesnt look bad (due to all the exercise) but I know it is there.

You arent being vain by getting the excess skin removed.  If anything, you are asking for a body that represents the amount of work and time you put into it.  That is reasonable. For example, for a reasonable amount of work, you would want a reasonable income/compensation. You wouldn't work hard, tirelessly for a slave's wage would you?

Also, you are returning your body to the state it was meant to be. While some sagging is expect with age, if one were NEVER MO they wouldnt have handfuls of excess skin would they.

It  isnt wrong or vain to request the body you worked for an earned. It is fair.

Before plastics, I also hid my excess skin well. I remember going to my bariatric surgeon after getting to goal for a follow up appointment and when examining me said, "Wow!! You DO have a lot of excess skin." It also made me feel validated in seeking plastic surgery.

I am exactly the same size I was pre-plastics, but I no longer have to wear shapewear to keep it all in place. I also know that plastic surgery gives me even more determination to stay at goal. I am not going to screw this up.

You deserve this, Tracy.

Thanks, Laura!  I don't expect that I'm going to be a smaller size after plastics either.  Even as a healthy teenager I had a boxy shape (no waist).  Plastics isn't going to change the shape I was born with.  

After the swelling goes down I hope the clothes I wear now will fit better and I won't have so much muffin top spilling over the sides.  

Thanks for your words of encouragement!