Old Pix of Me Before WLS and PS - I have not seen these in 11 yrs and looking at them HURTS

I don't know how I ever let myself become morbidly obese. My poor family. They loved me even when I hated myself. I am so sorry to have put them through that. Now it's payback time: I am going to make up for time lost! This girl's got some love to spread!

  My Bariatric Life "Before" RNY Gastric Bypass Weight Loss Surgery, Vishal Mehta M.D. mybariatriclifellc

  My Bariatric Life "Before" RNY Gastric Bypass Weight Loss Surgery, Vishal Mehta M.D. mybariatriclifellc

  My Bariatric Life "Before" RNY Gastric Bypass Weight Loss Surgery, Vishal Mehta M.D. mybariatriclifellc

  My Bariatric Life before RNY Gastric Bypass Weight Loss Surgery, Vishal Mehta M.D. mybariatriclifellc

   My Bariatric Life before RNY Gastric Bypass Surgery, Vishal Mehta M.D. mybariatriclifellc

I can't believe that is even you.  I look hard but don't even see you in there.  You have come a long way.

Thank you. It is so hard to believe I let myself get to that point. I was thin when I got married. Why I changed (physically and emotionally) into the person in those photos is something I shall never know. 

No!!!! this is not you, no way.

What a great job you did, amazing with RNY and PS.

Enjoy!

Alla

Thank you, Alla. Here is the pic my husband took of me the night before my RNY gastric bypass. I was 285 pounds, on 10 prescription medication for obesity related illnesses including injected insulin for diabetes and two meds for hypertension. I was headed to an early grave. I am so thankful to have had insurance coverage for weight loss surgery.

I am horrified to look at photos of myself at 293 lbs.  I know why I got fat, I was miserable and I emotionally ate.  I am in such a different place now (including losing 170 lbs of emotionally abusive husband!) and I have greater control on the emotional eating.  I posted my before photos in my profile, and I've added some along the journey, I'm not done yet (I have another 30-40 lbs left), but looking back does help me see how far I've come and encourages me to keep going now the end is in sight. I am too ashamed to post them anywhere else at the moment.  Maybe when I get to my destination I will feel strong enough to post to everyone.  Thanks for sharing!

Congrats on taking control of your health and your life. I am very very happy for you.

Never did I think I would post my before photos. But as you noted, once I reached my destination I found I was a much stronger, confident, fearless, and positive person. I wanted to celebrate my victory in defeating obesity and obesity related illnesses and inspire and motivate others that they, too, can achieve permanent weight loss. I is wonderful to no longer be ashamed of my body.

Keep up the great work! You are amazing!!!

Looking at old photos of myself does not hurt. I have forgiven myself. It's a very peaceful feeling. I believe that everything that I went through in the past helped mold me into the person I am today. And I think I am wonderful.

I hope you can find peace with your past.

In time I think I will make peace with the past. I need to get to a place of equilibrium, where I feel that I have made amends not only with myself but with my family. I just found these photos at my parents house when I was back in NJ. I have not seen them in something like 11yrs and I had forgotten just how I looked back then. And it is not just the way I looked, but all that goes with it -- the way I felt, the way I lived, in some kind of walking dead half-lived life. 

This is the person my husband married. I have the utmost respect and gratitude to him for seeing me through such a long and difficult journey. I honestly do not know how he stayed with me.

So cute!  I can recognize you in this photo, but not in the ones where you were heavy.  You look like yourself again. :)