The High Emotional Cost of Plastic Surgery that No One Tells You About

I've followed your journey for quite a while on realself and no matter what has been happening you always have been able to rise above it.  I could not believe how positive you were when you were dealing with all the complications from your arms...Others (even our own spouses) will never understand what we have been though...Each time I go in for a surgery, those thoughts of "what if..."  since it's a elective surgery, or the feeling the money should go elsewhere...all those thoughts not to mention the emotional  and physical pain involved and then the disappointment when a procedure doesn't turn out as we had hoped...It's not just the plastic surgery, but the whole journey, how did we ever end up so obese to begin with....Hopefully we have dealt with those issues by the time we get the  PS, but only those who have travel down the same road can truly understand...I think you are great and deserve to shine!!!   

Thanks AZ. I was at my parents this past Saturday. There I looked at some of my old photos. I do not own any that predate my WLS. As I am looking at the photos from high school when I was thin and pretty and then looking at the photos from 12 years or so later when I was super MO, I asked myself how the hell did I let this happen? What was wrong inside of me? I just don't know.And that is why I like to inspire obese people so that they can find there way as I finally did, and overcome obesity and all the crap that goes along with it. 

I am afraid of the what ifs, especially this time around as I have crappy insurance. 

Man girl my heart goes out to you.  I didn't realize how ruff you have had it.  You have always been so up and helpful to me.

I may well write a "tell all" book with all the details -- it will leave you stunned. 

That would be something.  I read your blog and didn't see/guess anything like that was going on.

I guess, then, that you missed this post http://www.healthcentral.com/obesity/c/276918/167141/plastic-surgeon-sexualized/ 

I have always been grateful for your honesty and advice. I am so sorry you have had to go through so much. To an extent I understand, after my anchor tummy tuck I was very depressed. I suffered from an anchor that my PS was not prepared for due to my lap band port (he did not feel comfy moving it so no muscle plication was done, even though he knew I had it and never voiced concern during appointments). I had a small opening that mentally drain the hell out of me. My results were awesome despite the top above my belly button there is still extra a lot extra but I still look 100% better than before. 

I still suffered from really bad depression, pain and feeling like I could not take care of myself and my family took a much bigger toll on me then I thought it would. I am just nearly a year out and still am not sure if I would do it all over again. It is done, and I do my best to be happy and love myself but I struggle with body image, food anxiety, and overall I border on OCD with diet and exercise. I have taken steps to reduce my symptoms, I realized I cannot track my calories and exercise the numbers kill me to a point I cannot sleep. So this month I started not counting all calories, I am still mindful of what I eat, nearly no carbs, and no snacking.  And just this week I started exercising with tracking, I do my walks at lunch (nearly 3 miles) then a few days a week I can squeeze in a 20 min run (or slow jog) but no more apps! I need to let myself feel worthy enough, I am enough. I struggle with balancing the "but you risked your life and all that money" with "live in life rather than running through it". I dont want to get so comfy that I abuse my tool (I have the band and you have all heard the horror of band abuse and how it can permanently damage your body) but I need to really chill.

Thank you again I really hope one day those caretakers get what they deserve.

Well, I have been vindicated in most of those scenarios. Not being believed was very hard. I was victimized all over again and again. I thought I had found peace with it all but each surgery brings new hurts that bring up the emotional pain from the prior surgeries. I really wanted this last surgery to go wonderfully nice and be the way it is supposed to be. That was so important to me. 

And I know that I will go through with the surgery as planned. Bt I just wonder what the cost will be to me emotionally? What more can go wrong -- and boy, that is a train of thought I do not want to have late at night when I cannot sleep? My surgeon has already told me he will do the surgery himself and keep me safe. 

As for the other surgeon, he can go f*ck himself and rot in hell. I published an article all about what happened and one woman *****ad it told me privately of her plastic surgeon who had assaulted her. She told me that the second time it happened she kicked him hard! As for me, I froze... Both times. But if I ever see him again I hope I will kick him. My husband told me to slap him across the face and then dare him to have me arrested because if he did then I would tell everyone what he did to me. I like that idea.

The evil-hearted medical assistant no longer is employed *anywhere* as far as I know. 

As for my husband and the PA (hate to lump the two together) I guess they each are speaking from their own points of emotional pain. My husband supported me through this for a very long time but this incredulous journey has taken its toll on an already tenuous situation (relocating out of state, starting a new business, and renovating a 6600 sq.ft. House). He did not deserve to be further burdened with the "**** storm" that surrounds my plastic surgery. As I wrote at the beginning of my original post, everyone has their breaking point. 

I am sorry that you also have difficulties to work through. There really is a lot to be joyful for with plastic surgery, but people should know it is a difficult journey physically, financially, and emotionally. I wish you peace and happiness and a long and healthy life ahead.

I'm shocked and sorry about the hurts you've experienced. I read about your experiences while I waited for my recent surgery, but had no idea how much you'd been through. I, too, hope you find peace and healing. {{{hugs}}}

Thank you. I truly appreciate the show of support from you and everyone else who posted. It really made a difference. I will be OK in the end. If one thing I have learned about myself through all this is that I am strong... Bt even I have my times of despair and that is what you witnessed above. I think I cried myself to sleep last night.