DIY Plastics -- Could this work?

 Two observations:

 1)      Quite often, I look around the Plastic Surgery Forum page and see “Massage" where it actually reads “Message Board."  And then I’m always a bit disappointed when I realize my mistake;

2)      Deep in my heart, I’m longing to create a fictitious troll post on the Plastics Forum that says:

I really need a lower body lift, breast lift, thigh lift, upper body lift, and brachioplasty.  But the costs are high.

Many of you have bravely posted about removing your own drains and sutures – so this got me to thinking I should try a DIY surgery.  So far I’m pretty sure I would need the following:

A bottle of vodka
X-Acto knife
Band-Aids

Is there anything else I will need?

Thanks for all your feedback!!!

Anyway, that’s been on my mind.  Feel better now that I’ve got it off my chest.  Have a great evening everyone!!!   I'm off to an evening at the theater with my husband, and his childhood friend (who will drag along his obnoxious wife who spent years reviling my weight loss successes while eating herself into oblivion).  While there, I will exhibit tact, diplomacy, and saviour faire.  Well, maybe not all three at once.  (I'm going to think about trying each one in alphabetical order).  

I'm still "on the boards," reading away and enjoying all of you, and wanted to say hi ... so hi!!!

you are too funny, don't forget the antibiotics

 Generic neosporin?  or would the stuff left over from my last bladder infection eight years ago suffice?

Charming is back !

Now, the DIY idea is really got me going here. 

I think it will probably work although you may need to add a little rubbing alcohol to wipe off the X-acto blade.  Of course, the Vodka could double here....

On a negative note, this DIY idea makes me realize I probably wasted 14 years of college, med school, and surgery training and then another 4 on my fellowship. And all this "continuing education" they require here...sheesh ! 

Theater for you tonight...I'm off to work on the DIY manual.

Dr. L, you are too funny.  Makes me wish I lived in TX.

Lisa Mc

The play was crackpot b*llsh*t ... I spent the whole time working on the script for our brand new product in my head, Dr. L ...

What WILL you DO with the MONEY you Saaaaaaaaaave . . .

X-Acto knife . . . whiskey . . . bandaids . . . . But WAIT . ..  there's more!!!

Act now, and we'll throw in our own copyrighted edition of Doctor El's "Plastic Surgery for Dummies" . . . NOW how much would you pay?

Plus!  A  tube of generic  bacitracin, neomycin, and polymyxin B . . . the same scientifically proven antibiotics used by real physicians to treat actual bacteria . . . What is that worth?  THREE hundred dollars?  Howabout TWO hundred?

Would you believe . . . $99.99!!!

Call now, and we will include before-and-after stock photos of Hollywood starlet wannabees, imprinted with YOUR name, to show your friends and neighbors.  It's your body . . . show it off, but without the shame and embarrassment of ever being seen by a real physician ...


Gosh, Dr. L . . . don't feel bad.  It took fourteen years for you to become a top flight plastic surgeon, but if we really brainstorm we can have this product ready to be hawked by the next Billy Mays in time for next Christmas!  And THEN think of the money we'll make!

If only...it sure could have saved me many hours in travel time, as well as a boatload of money.

Oh well, perhaps next time... Dr. Sauceda was worth all the trouble and cash this go-around!

I think you might need a bullet to bite on :)

Nancy

and surely some whiskey.

That's what the vodka is for ... though whiskey I'm sure would be fine.

Bet they both make a fine antiseptic, too!