Body Image - Best Anniversary Present

Hi Everyone. I am wondering if I will ever feel content with my body. I was 275 lbs and lost down to 160. I had my beautiful daughter who is now 19 months but gained a lot of weight during the process. I am currently 185 lbs. I just had breast lift/implants and a tummy tuck. I finally have accepted the fact that I needed to purchase pants with buttons.  I've been trying to lose enough weight to fit in my pre-pregnancy clothes. I went downstairs with my renewed vow to lose the last 20 lbs and my husband said to me, "You can do it if you put your mind to it but you do realize that you aren't fat, right?" He then asked me if I thought my mind would ever catch up with the fact that I am not seriously overweight anymore. It was our anniversary and those words were the best present he could have given me. I wonder if someday when I have my arms & legs done (if I ever do) and lose those last 20-30 lbs if I will feel "normal" or will I always feel overweight. I'm not delusional I realize that I have come a very long way but I still feel like people look at me like the "fat" girl.

You are not going to want to hear this, but it's just me being honest about what I feel. I weigh 110 lbs. I'm 5'4". I'm bordering on the "underweight" (line is 107 for me). I can see ribs and hip bones and mentally i know i look GOOD in a swimsuit now (i've had LBL, BL/BA, lots of thigh work and my arms done). My fiance' freaks out if I lose a pound anymore, tells me everyday not to lose any more. However, when I look in the mirror sometimes I still see someone who's over 200 pounds. I will probably always feel this way. I KNOW I am one way, I FEEL I am still heavy.

Cass

Here I was thinking I was crazy! I have lost 98lbs, gone from a 24 to a 10, but when I look in the mirror, I see the same old me! It is very hard to get our minds wrapped around the idea that we are not as large as we used to be. I still step back if I feel someone is getting "too close" in my personal space. One day I noticed that I would stay about 6 feet away from people, because I thought I needed that extra room. Our image of how we view ourselves is so different from how others see us. I was talking to a friend about the dreaded PS pictures I took to send to DR S and how I had a knee jerk reaction as to how I viewed myself in them thinking that is how others see me as well. She keeps insisting that I'm not fat, but I think of the pictures and tell her clothes camoflauge us very well! lol!!

Congrats on the best words we can hear from our hunny bunnies!

Gail

HI
 I am 5-4 and 170 lbs and I feel fat, I can look in a picture & see I am smaller, people say I am thin and I said to my husban am I thin or do I look thinner compared to when I was 270 lbs and he said I am thin, I can wear a misses size 10 or 12 so I must be thin, I would have been happy in a 16 and then a 14 but the pants I have on now are a 10 I am just amazed.
I had a TT, inner thigh back & butt lift and now I will have my arms done in 4 weeks, my husband thinks I am crazy but he loved me @ 270 and thinks I am perfect now why do I want more plastics. We started out this journey  to get healthy then the vanity struck
Susan

I know exactly what you mean.  I still look in the mirror and see the fat girl and imperfections.  I am 5'6, 157 lbs, and a size 8.  I am 2 week post op from plastics and have a ton of swelling still.  What I see in the mirror is not what I see in pictures.  I can see why people think I am skinny when I look at pictures, but I just feel fat at the moment with the swelling.  Dr S said I should be a 4 or 6 after all the swelling is gone, and that completely amazes me!  I thought my mind would catch up with my body after the plastics, but it still hasn't. 

I'm sure we've all heard about the patient who loses a limb and can still feel the pain or the itch ... our fat is our lost limb - it's gone, but we still feel it there.  I'm sure it will take some time to get over the fact that we are not fat anymore.  I remember (as I was going up) walking down the hall and seeing the fat lady coming towards me and realizing (with horror) it was a mirror.  If it takes the same amount of time on the way down, I figure in about 10 years I'll look in the mirror and see a skinny lady coming at me.
L.

I really liked your limb analogy.

I was just trying to explain this to a friend who has NEVER been overweight and she looked at me like I was nuts!! I know in clothes I wear a med. top and size 4-6 pants, but naked, I still see all the fat and stretch marks and I look gross.  I am still nervous when I go clothes shopping like the alarm in my *ss is going to go off and the store employee is going to come over and point me to the womens department...Crazy I know...but I am glad to here others "get it".  Maybe some day our brains will catch up to our weight/size. :)

Thank you all for the posts. I'm not glad that others have the same image distortion but it is very nice to know that I am not alone. I do think part of it is that I have some excess weight to lose but 90% of it is a mental thing. I can certainly identify with the mirror. I have seen myself on camera and wondered who it was at both ends - 275 & 160.  I find myself nervous that I won't fit in a desk or that I will be too big for a seatbelt. I am very much amazed at the power of the mind and how it shape your/our percepetions of ourselves. I don't have any family or friends that struggle with their weight the way that I do or have been as heavy so sometimes it is hard to find understanding from my loved ones. They care and love me but don't always understand why or how I feel the way I do. Thanks again for listening.