Terrible 2s at 1?????

Ok, my son, Kyan (pronounced like Ryan w/ a K) is 14 mos old. I am concerned that he is going through terrible 2s early. Background: This is my first child, first child in our family (first grandbaby, etc). I worked from home until he was 9 mos. He's not lacking in the attention dept. Then they called me to go back into the office, client obligations. So, one of my manager's suggested his wife as an option for keeping him. He saw how distraught I was searching for daycares. Long story short, she's been keeping him since May. I love her. She's awesome. She takes him on playdates, they have a beautiful home, she's inexpensive, he stays w/ 2 other kids (her's), a 12 mo. old boy, and a 4 year old girl. She's a teacher by degree but a SAHM by choice. Sweet, sweet, lady, young, active, involved, etc. Anyway, Kyan has had episodes of biting me before and swatting at me and I thought it was because he was teething. Now, it's beyond that, his teeth are in (mostly). He's not only hitting and biting me but he's being a complete and utter bully to the kids he stays with not to mention a terror when he's home w/ me and my DH. He walked in this morning and the second he saw the 4 yr old, he pushed her out of his way, pulled her hair, and hit her on the head. All she had done was open the door for us and say, "good morning sweet baby we get to play outside today!" Sidenote: I know she has been mean to him, I've seen her push him or hit him and the mom reprimands her and sends her to her room. I'd really not like to blame the 4 year old or the lady that keeps my child. I saw on Dr. Phil last week where a child was throwing tantrums (she was 2) and he said that that was learned behavior from her parents. Me and Kevin (DH) are nothing like that couple so I don't know where he'd learn that except from the 4 year old. Help in discipline ideas please?!?!?!? I do not want my precious innocent baby to be the bully. Besides, I'm going to have to put him in daycare come January (we are moving, I hope) and kids can get kicked out of daycare for stuff like this. And, w/ 2 babies on the way, I don't want him to hurt them. Is this a phase? What am I doing wrong? Me and DH are at a loss. Look at my profile and you will see a picture of my precious son, he doesn't even look like a bully. Khaki Kyan 07/14/05 EDD Twins 04/15/07

If you figure it out...let me know. Jackson hits and bites me all the time. Also if I say NO to sternly he throws a little fit. Jess

Kyan is a cutie pie and looks like you. I have no advice for you- Aiden is my first and he is 7 months old. I do have a few questions though. What age did he start biting and hiting? Im scared that Aiden may start doing the same. If Aiden is anything like me and his dad- Good Lord look out. Our home life is very peaceful , no yelling at all(we ignore each other when we are mad) But dh and I are both made out of **** & vinegar I know this poor child has our dna and I keep thinking this is the calm before the storm..

Thank you. I could not have asked for a better baby. Kyan was such a sweet good natured boy (never cried or fussed for anything****il the teeth came. Then he would bite at me all the time until I would give him orajel and tylenol. So, that's what made me think the biting was teeth. Then I read that was common, not normal, but common and that was how he was expressing himself. He started biting my shoulder (when I'd be talking to someone or making a bottle or something w/ him on my hip) around 6-7 mos. Then during play time he'd bite me (only me, he has yet to bite my husband). It didn't always hurt or seem to be out of frustration. Sometimes I even thought he was trying to give me kisses. But now, within the last month I've noticed it progressing, he hits me and leaves bruises and scratches and cries and throws things, no kisses about it at all. It's when he doesn't get his way.

I am truly sorry that i dont have any advice. But I understand what you are saying. Its like Kyan is showing you love and been playful when he does these things.

Well while he's at home with ya'll, ignore him when he does that. If you're holding him when he does it, put him down and walk away. He'll learn that you're not going to give him attention for that behavior. Just put him down, say "No hitting or No biting" whatever it was that he did, and walk away for 2 or 3 minutes. He'll get it......if I bite or hit, Mom and Dad don't pay attention to me. For some it works, for some it doesn't. If he bites, you may try giving him something to bite on and say, No biting Mommy or Daddy, bite this and give him a toy or rag or something he CAN bite on. Allie Mom to tyler 11 Allie 3 1/2 Alex 2 1/2 Noah almost 3 months!!

glad to see you. note to self if A bites or hits... i had heard to stop them & say a firm no that hurts. A pulls hair and I stop him and say no it hurts etc... I told my mom to do the same and she wanted to argue.. "Oh the baby doesnt know any better". She thinks I am punishing him, uggh.. Now look mawmaw I know by gentley opening his little hand and saying no Aiden that hurts _______ please dont pull hair- that isnt punishment. God love grandmaws...

I agree with Allie. I was told that you say in a firm voice "No, that hurts Mommy when you bite me" and put him down and walk away. I did that with Danny when he was going through his biting phase last month and after a couple of days of that, no more problems. I stuck him in the playpen so he really didn't have anywhere to go but he soon got the hint that biting would land him back in "jail" He was 9 mos old when the problem started. -Janine