Here we go again

dit657
on 1/19/12 9:05 pm - Boothwyn, PA
No words of wisdom from me, Lisa, since I didn't raise a teenager - just sending good thoughts and prayers your way (and hers) that you both get through this - counseling seems to be your best option, and hopefully Kids Peace can get her into a program that will help turn her around.

One thing I do know from your posts and the way others speak of you is that you are a GOOD mother - don't ever question that - if you weren't you wouldn't give a damn where she was or who she was with.

Hugs, Kathy

ps: while turning to sticky buns isn't the greatest option in the world, it beats the heck out of drugs or alcohol!!


'One shoe can change your life'...Cinderella
R K.
on 1/19/12 10:10 pm
I've dealt with a couple boys from a local home. Structure, consequences that are clearly define and carried out and a system that allows them to earn privilege. These are boys with no family support and other behavioral issues then add ADHD to the mix.

The other thing that works on dog training and kid raising is NILF. Nothing in life is free. You start with no privileges and earn them a little at a time. You want a movie then you need to do this.... could be a perfect week at school or on time everyday.

Structure and consistency are key plus you have to set it up so they don't feel like anything they do is a waste of time or they will give up.

Question, why KidsPeace?
*
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
Randy Pausch
Lisa H.
on 1/19/12 10:25 pm - Whitehall, PA
 I chose Kids Peace because we have been seeing them for therapy for a couple of years for therapy and med checks.  We have had some success with them and they are a reputable organization for dealing with kids with behavioral issues.  

We started there after we had a rather physical altercation followed by a trip to the Muhlenberg psych ER.  

Is there somewhere else you are thinking of, Roger? 

My tracker

hers 

Laureen S.
on 1/19/12 11:00 pm - Maple Shade, NJ
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Lisa}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}  {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Lisa & Siehara}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

You're doing a wonderful job, all the right moves and I agree with what has been said.  Hope your talk went well. . . more importantly, I hope the help you ultimately get, helps Siehara to get to a more even keel for herself. . .


My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . .  It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . .  Laureen

"Success is a journey, not a destination."  Ben Sweetland

R K.
on 1/20/12 8:36 am
I will ask around but I'm not in the Lehigh Valley.  I am a big fan of religious based aka value based therapy. Either through the Church or Synagogue it seems to add an extra dimension of moral responsibility.
*
"If I only had three words of advice, they would be, Tell the Truth. If got three more words, I'd add, all the time."
Randy Pausch
(deactivated member)
on 1/20/12 12:08 am

Lisa, I am sorry you are going through these rough times with Siehara. I am scared for her myself deep down because when you spend time with her you would never know she has these troubles.

You ahve been very proactive in working with her. You make a point of spending time with her when you are not at work.  I think she is just going through a very rough emotional time and with you being away from all of us we can not offer the physical support only the emotional support in words.  I am with Steffi have you thought about moving closer to all of us so you can get the help in person.

As I was readung I ws thinking I guess we're locking up the laptops and desk top in a few weeks and we will do anything you need when she is here with us. Which you know we will do for you if you ask.

I get so scared for her not being a parent I take on the worries of my friends in the kid department,. I think all the things she may do thinking it will be acceptence and not the right thing. THen find herself in a place she really doesn't want to be.

Love you and Den and I are here for you

LindaScrip
on 2/10/12 1:55 am
just wanted to say the day I ever have to call a store for safety of my child and get told that all hell would break loose I would have the police and the media involved and Apple would be embarassed!  No damn way would that fly in my book. I cannot believe Apple would make it where someone can get on the internet in their store unsupervised especially a teenager wow thats nuts!   Practicing having to live outside? Wow here is Mom busting her ass to make sure that doesn't happen and she said that? Thank goodness for Blake.  I know you have had her in therapy but has she actually been diagnosed with any type of disorder if you don't mind being asked that.  I haven't been on here for a long time as I am going through marital issues wow I actually said that.. I see myself having a parting of the ways after 22 years but it is what it is.  And I hate to say it but hisbehavior is the same as hers.  the support you get here is wonderful but keep in mind that even if you moved here do you really think that it would stop her from doing things? Yes someone would keep an eye on her but people are resourseful. My issue here is I am tired of living with a knot in my stomach and yours is its your child I think thats tougher I have such a crazy suggestion here so hold onto your panties have you ever thought of finding a riding program for her to go to I mean horses I know you are probably ready to commit me but at this point what can it hurt don't give her a choice she has taken that option out of your hands but I know someone who had similar problems and she got her daughter involved in a riding program her daughter has done so wel with it. she actually takes care of the horses and shows and trail rides like we do.  There are programs that do not charge you.
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