my letter to Siehara

I have not given this to her yet.  I wrote it out today and want opinions.  I typed it up because it's easier for me to think and change things.  But, I am going to hand write it before I give it to her.  It is that important that I think it should be written out.   Please let me know what you think and be brutally honest, as I know you will be.

Changed a bit

Dear Siehara,

 I love you always.  I love you when you make good decisions.  I love you when you make bad decisions.   I love you when you are smiling and laughing and I love you when you are crying and yelling.  I love you always.  

There are times when I do not like the decisions you make or the way that you act.  This does not mean that I do not love YOU.  You are at a point in your life where you have to make a lot of hard decisions.  Your friends are going to want you to do things that you may know in your heart are wrong, but you are going to want them to like you so you will do them anyway.   Just remember that everyone in your world may have an opinion, but only YOU can decide where and who YOU want to be.    

Always remember that no matter how bad of a mistake you may make, no matter how much pain and regret it may cause, the people who truly love you will see past it because you matter to them more than you may ever know.

If you make a mistake, have the courage to admit it.  It doesn’t matter if you are forgiven or not, what matters is that you took responsibility for it.  If a choice you made was wrong, then do something about it.  Accept the responsibility for your actions and the consequences that are bound to follow. 

Siehara, you are a beautiful person inside and out.  You are an amazing role model for all of the little children whose lives you touch.  When you are helping out with all of our “little friends", I see the joy in your face and in theirs.  I love watching you playing and interacting with them.  You work hard in school and your hard work shows in your grades.  You have also been working very hard to change your behaviors.  I can see the improvement in the way you act every day.  You have shown great responsibility in helping to care for Skecher and with other household chores you have taken on.  Your cooking skills are probably better than mine. (not that it would take much.. lol)  

There are many things that I want to say to you.  This is only the beginning.  I want you to know that you can come to me with anything, any time.  If you want to talk, vent, cry, laugh, whatever.. I am here for you.   

Just remember that I love you always! 

Love, Mom 

Lisa,
Beautiful and touching. I would keep this letter forever if my mom wrote it for me. Even after she was no longer in this world. I really really think this will help her tremendously. You did good kid.

Lisa, this letter will be a keepsake for her forever.

I might make 2 suggestions- maybe use the word consequences rather than punishment, since sometimes the consequences are not in the form of being punished.

And I might give her a few added examples of her strengths and the things you are proud of her for doing or being.

You are such a good mom!

I picked over this with a fine tooth comb....I decided that I dont want to make any changes or suggestions.  I think it gets your message across perfectly.  These letters dont have to be perfect or encompass all aspects of your relationship with her, these letters are only the beginning of this new chapter of open, heartfelt, encouraging communication.  Mission accomplished.

Swede

I think this is a beautiful, heartfelt letter, Lisa. And I agree that it should be handwritten.

Handwritten. Not spelled checked or reviewed for any errors or opinions. I hope you gave it to her already. because a heartfelt letter from mom, should be ust that......and not any type of reconstructed version from strangers on the internet. Friend or not...........we are ALL strangers in the context of the relationship with you and your daughter!


Love & hugs from another mom of a pre-teen pushing buttons!

 I have not given it to her, mostly because I have not had a chance to hand write it yet.  

She will be home by 11:30 today.  It will be on her bed by the time she gets home from school. 

This perfectly conveys that yes, she is good enough and she is loved unconditionally.

xoxo,

Maura

wonderful letter, I would cherish any kind of words like this from my mother.

It is perfect. From a monther's heart - there's no better thing.

And you are right, she is / will be an inspiration to many children. She is great with Mia! Does she have any idea what she might like to do - I could see her being a teacher or nurse or something where she deals with kids.