What would YOU say...

I feel sorry for your friend then.  I was in eating disorder treatment with women who had binge eating disorder, like me, anorexia, and bulimia.  At first, I was not sure I would find common ground with the anorexics and bulimics, but when we got to talking about our feelings and childhood issues, it was like we had all read each others' minds.  We all suffered from the same negative experiences and emotions.  We just used the food in different ways, me to consume it, they chose to control it and either purge it or just not consume it at all. 

All of us were literally trying to kill ourselves with our distorted eating behaviors.  This is why I get extremely angry with jerks, like your friend's boyfriend.  Obese people, like the anorexics, are in a lot of emotional pain, and on the verge of killing themselves, and deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, not scorned or laughed at. 

Sorry for my rant.  If your friend is ever in need of treatment, I can recommend the Eating Disorder Treatment Center. in Feasterville, is run by the psychiatrist who runs the inpatient program at Friends Hospital in Philadelphia.  He has been named one of Philadelphia's Top Docs for Women by Philadelphia Magazine in years past.  They are excellent and accept all types of insurance.

Hugs,
Trish

you werent ranting. ...and i didnt take any offense. she is in treatment and was sent to rehab a few years ago. she's okay now...although i sometimes wonder.

this isnt the first time i've gotten angry over society and its discrimination. i wish there was something i could do...but i think i'm learning to let it go so i dont get all worked up about it. i get pretty fired up.  i laughed at the guy who proceeded to chase me out of the bar and ask me for my number...a few months ago i would have been PISSED. so....i guess i have to let it go and be a little more quick with sarcasm next time.

I understand your desire to change the world and their view on certain issues.  I guess that is why I was so determined to get my Masters in Social Work, and try to get a job in mental health.  (Hard to believe I would even suggest kicking someone in the balls when you realize I work in a psychiatric hospital.)  I see people who are hurting all the time, and so want them to find inner peace and the ability to make the changes they need to make to become healthy, whole and happy.  Your friend's jerky boyfriend probably has some unresolved issues and is using his ignorant mouth to vent his pain in an ass-backwards sort of way. 

One of the things I learned in my treatment program was how to really apply the One Day At A Time philosophy I learned in AA in a real life situation.  In treatment, I had to journal my food and emotions, as well as my exercise.  My food was examined weekly by a nutritionist and we discussed my successes and my failures.  In group sessions we did the same on a daily basis.  Where I used to beat myself up for a slip, or binge, I was taught to be gentle on myself, and see the big picture of my progress, instead of the blip on the radar of a slip.  I hope that your friend is experiencing more progresses, and successes, and fewer blips.  But, the one thing I learned that was SOOOOOOOOOO hard to accept was the reality that there would probably be blips for the rest of my life.  Keeping them few and far between was my goal, not the total elimination of them. 

Have a good day, and tons of blessings to you and your friend.

Hugs,
Trish

Someone like him doesn't even deserve to be entertained with a response.  If your friends have any class, the way you seem to, then they were all secretly mortified at his ignorance and immaturity.  The sad thing is, that since this guy didn't know you before, he thought he was sounding "cool" with his remark to get the pretty skinny girls in the group (and guys too) to laugh.  Society is full of people like him, and sadly, they won't go away.  We need to remain the bigger people, even if not physically bigger anymore, and try to let some things just roll off of our backs.  Some just aren't worth our precious breath.....and after what we've been through, believe me, those breaths are definitely precious! 

i agree...and well put. i didnt really fight it becuase it just wasnt worth my breath.

funny though- another guy literally chased me out of the bar and asked for my number.  i told him i had a boyfriend and was flattered...and said to myself (from Borat movie) "You will never get this...la la la" !!!

You could suggest going there....You've heard that (Pick any of the following) dine there, and he'd fit right in!

suggested choices:
Dickless Wonders
********
Jackasses
etc...

Great answer.  I think yours is the best by far.  Thanks for making me smile.

Hugs,
Trish

hahaha...LOL

      Did he look like this?



just kidding......i couldnt resist, as soon as I read that Peter Griffin popped in my mind.....LOL

That's hysterical!!!