Vic,

It is so important to have a good relationship with your neighbors and it looks like you both could be of great support to each other. One of the reasons that I have cats instead of dogs is that dogs do require a lot of training and managing and I am too busy to invest in either.  Cats are happy to sleep in a chair next to me or to simply get an ear scratch from time-to-time.

I cannot imagine how hard it is going to be figuring out what to do with your mother. No matter what you do, it is not going to be good. If she stays, she is only going to require more and more supervision but if you move her into a home or retirement community, she is going to feel abandoned. 

Now this is my little piece of advice because I have had custody of my grandson when he was a baby and I spend a lot of time with my daughter's two younger children, but the sooner you can transition the baby back to full-time care of her mother, the better for her, her mother, and you. I suggest that you offer support in other areas such as helping her find child care for those times that she is working on her dissertation or the times she is doing research or teaching. If you are not careful, you are going to create a situation in which she won't learn how to be a single parent and because you raised your girls with your husband being gone so much of the time, you know how important it is to learn how to negotiate that process alone...and the sooner the better.  Your relationship as the baby's grandmother must be developed too and that cannot happen when you are the mother...and I know you are also realizing that your own life has been put on hold enough and it goes without saying that you need to take care of yourself.

Help your daughter by helping her find childcare, helping her pay it, and then you get your house back to being your space and heal...spend time doing the things you like without the interruptions of others. I know that is going to sound harsh but you are not handling any of this very well and it is triggering you to get your hands on sugar...I think it is time for you to do something for Vic... 

Good morning sistas,

I wish I could send y'all some of this glorious sunshine and warm weather!  It's absolutely gorgeous here today.  

Well, you know, my life is just full of those Oh Em Gee moments.  Most of them are not welcome either!  So.  Last Night.  OMG.  I've been having issues with my next door neighbor and all the dogs since we moved in.  (She's a widow and I'm a widow, and I had hopes that we could become good friends, you know?  But the damn dogs are pretty much ruining that scenario.)  We each have two little dogs and while they are not exactly friendly with one another, all they really do is run up and down our adjoining fence and bark at each other a lot.  Annoying but not really a problem.

However, now my daughter and her two dogs are pretty much living with me, including Lulu, who is little and scrappy and very aggressive with strange dogs. Y'all remember just a week back, Lulu got through the wrought iron fence (during the landscaping work) and attacked Bernice's little wiener dog.  It was awful.  But my yard guys put the wire guards back in place along the bottom half of the fence and I hoped the problem was solved.  

BUT.  Bernice's daughter has come for an extended visit and she has two dogs, including a big aggressive American bull dog.  She charges the fence every chance she gets and she's taller than the wire guards.  She cannot get her big head between the wrought iron posts, but Lulu can!  Last time they were here, Lulu bit that dog on the nose because her head is little and she can almost stick it through the fence.  A big problem and it caused some hard feelings the last time it happened. 

So, when I saw that Bree and her dogs had arrived a couple of days ago, I fixed a tie-out for Lulu in the back yard and she cannot reach the fence when she is on it.  But for some unfathomable reason, my mother will not put Lulu on the tie out when she takes them outside!  I don't know why.  Well, last night I was in the bathtub, Carrie was feeding the baby, and there goes Mom, out the back door with all the dogs.  Of course, she didn't put Lulu on the tie-out.  Lulu and that big dog got in a big fight in between the fence posts.  Oy vey!  Lulu had ahold of that big dog's nose and would not let go!  Blood was everywhere.

The ironic thing is I had just gone to Lowe's yesterday afternoon and purchased an electric fence to install along that side of the yard to prevent that very thing from happening.  Carrie and I had planned to put it in today.  You would think my mom could comply with the "inconvenience" of putting Lulu on the tie out for just one more day, wouldn't you?  But no.  So I had to go running over to my neighbor's house last night in my bathrobe and slippers to make sure their dog was okay and try to smooth things over.  Again.  

I tell y'all, these dogs are making my life hell!  I just want to give Maybelle back to my SIL on Tuesday and send Carrie's dogs back to Waco next week, and then all I will have left here is my little Patty Kate, who is easy to manage and doesn't cause me any problems at all.

I was so upset after all that last night that I went out to the freezer in the garage and ate a handful of frozen M&M's.  Some people drink, some people do pills--I do chocolate.  (No offense to anyone here--we all have our Achille's heel.)  And I liked to have never calmed down enough to sleep last night.

I hate conflict and I do NOT like to be on awkward or bad terms with my neighbors.  I just want to live here in peace.  Her dogs have a right to be out in their back yard and so do mine.  I'm doing my best to find a solution to the problem.  I wish my husband was here.  He was so good at solving problems.

No one is going to like the electric fence, but I'm going to put it up today.  Once my dogs learn to avoid it, I can unplug the electricity and just leave the wire up in place.  It won't be pretty (dammit!), but maybe it will solve the problem.

Sorry to just go on and on about this.  I'm just so upset with the entire situation.  Hell, I'm upset with my entire life right now.  Between the demands of caring for the dogs and my mom and my daughters and the baby, I feel about ready to fly apart at the seams.  All I really want to do is play in the dirt and sew pretty things.  You would think I could do that at this stage in my life, wouldn't you?  

Well, I'll stop now.  Whining never solved anything.  Sorry for the rant.  I love you all!

Hello Nancy...thank you for the very nice post. We all need loving, healing, energy and prayers.

 I so appreciate all of these kinds of posts. We can never get enough of these blessings.

I will not be answering any other posts today or tomorrow for sure.

My computer all of a sudden doesn't want to type all the letters. It was not spilled on or any other thing. I can't type much on my phone. I will be reading all posts.

I decided I will let it set for the weekend. Monday I will make some calls. I don't want to ruin my weekend over this. 

Loads of love and hugs !!

Sending much loving and healing energy & prayers for clarity

and uplifted spirits. *hugs*

Best Of Luck With All You And Your Hubby Are Facing Prayers And Best Wishes Heading Your way