Sunny Sunday

Good morning sistas,

I wish I could send y'all some of this glorious sunshine and warm weather!  It's absolutely gorgeous here today.  

Well, you know, my life is just full of those Oh Em Gee moments.  Most of them are not welcome either!  So.  Last Night.  OMG.  I've been having issues with my next door neighbor and all the dogs since we moved in.  (She's a widow and I'm a widow, and I had hopes that we could become good friends, you know?  But the damn dogs are pretty much ruining that scenario.)  We each have two little dogs and while they are not exactly friendly with one another, all they really do is run up and down our adjoining fence and bark at each other a lot.  Annoying but not really a problem.

However, now my daughter and her two dogs are pretty much living with me, including Lulu, who is little and scrappy and very aggressive with strange dogs. Y'all remember just a week back, Lulu got through the wrought iron fence (during the landscaping work) and attacked Bernice's little wiener dog.  It was awful.  But my yard guys put the wire guards back in place along the bottom half of the fence and I hoped the problem was solved.  

BUT.  Bernice's daughter has come for an extended visit and she has two dogs, including a big aggressive American bull dog.  She charges the fence every chance she gets and she's taller than the wire guards.  She cannot get her big head between the wrought iron posts, but Lulu can!  Last time they were here, Lulu bit that dog on the nose because her head is little and she can almost stick it through the fence.  A big problem and it caused some hard feelings the last time it happened. 

So, when I saw that Bree and her dogs had arrived a couple of days ago, I fixed a tie-out for Lulu in the back yard and she cannot reach the fence when she is on it.  But for some unfathomable reason, my mother will not put Lulu on the tie out when she takes them outside!  I don't know why.  Well, last night I was in the bathtub, Carrie was feeding the baby, and there goes Mom, out the back door with all the dogs.  Of course, she didn't put Lulu on the tie-out.  Lulu and that big dog got in a big fight in between the fence posts.  Oy vey!  Lulu had ahold of that big dog's nose and would not let go!  Blood was everywhere.

The ironic thing is I had just gone to Lowe's yesterday afternoon and purchased an electric fence to install along that side of the yard to prevent that very thing from happening.  Carrie and I had planned to put it in today.  You would think my mom could comply with the "inconvenience" of putting Lulu on the tie out for just one more day, wouldn't you?  But no.  So I had to go running over to my neighbor's house last night in my bathrobe and slippers to make sure their dog was okay and try to smooth things over.  Again.  

I tell y'all, these dogs are making my life hell!  I just want to give Maybelle back to my SIL on Tuesday and send Carrie's dogs back to Waco next week, and then all I will have left here is my little Patty Kate, who is easy to manage and doesn't cause me any problems at all.

I was so upset after all that last night that I went out to the freezer in the garage and ate a handful of frozen M&M's.  Some people drink, some people do pills--I do chocolate.  (No offense to anyone here--we all have our Achille's heel.)  And I liked to have never calmed down enough to sleep last night.

I hate conflict and I do NOT like to be on awkward or bad terms with my neighbors.  I just want to live here in peace.  Her dogs have a right to be out in their back yard and so do mine.  I'm doing my best to find a solution to the problem.  I wish my husband was here.  He was so good at solving problems.

No one is going to like the electric fence, but I'm going to put it up today.  Once my dogs learn to avoid it, I can unplug the electricity and just leave the wire up in place.  It won't be pretty (dammit!), but maybe it will solve the problem.

Sorry to just go on and on about this.  I'm just so upset with the entire situation.  Hell, I'm upset with my entire life right now.  Between the demands of caring for the dogs and my mom and my daughters and the baby, I feel about ready to fly apart at the seams.  All I really want to do is play in the dirt and sew pretty things.  You would think I could do that at this stage in my life, wouldn't you?  

Well, I'll stop now.  Whining never solved anything.  Sorry for the rant.  I love you all!

Good Grief Vic!!!!!!!!! I hope you yelled good at your mother for that!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know I would have!!!!!!!!!!! HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Well my company or should I say Rick's company is gone!!!  Now for next weekend...  I am not looking forward to that at all!!!!!!!!!!! Just might have a drink or two or three or four...

Went to bingo last night and I once again had to split the winnings...I ended up with $28.25 this time. Monthly drawing was also last night...winner drawn...not signed...jackpot gets bigger!!!

Had nasty weather yesterday here...SNOW & WINDS!!!!!!! OMG the WINDS!!!!!! Some of the roof came up on the big clubhouse and now we have that to contend with. Not sure if we have to fix it or if corporate will do that. Have to take some pictures and send in tomorrow.

Making baby back ribs in the oven today...oh yummmmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!! I am drooling for them already!!!!!!!!!!  

Anyhow nothing else happening here...so gonna go play my games that I couldn't do yesterday....

Thoughts & Prayers for ALL that need them!!!!!!

HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Judy, 

I cannot imagine how awful it must be for you to entertain your husband's family. I know that you have issues with them in the past and that they have not been nice to you so to have them in  your apartment and to have to be nice to them is awful. I tend to stay away front people I don't like and that includes my husband's family. His sister is a total ***** and I told him she is his sister and if he wants to have a relationship with her, he can do it out of my eyesight because I cannot stand her...she is racists, manipulative, ignorant, and a drunk and I am not required to entertain evil people.  

I am glad you are able to eat food again and I hope all of that  is working well.  

Enjoy your ribs and hopefully you will get some much needed rest. 

Vic,

It is so important to have a good relationship with your neighbors and it looks like you both could be of great support to each other. One of the reasons that I have cats instead of dogs is that dogs do require a lot of training and managing and I am too busy to invest in either.  Cats are happy to sleep in a chair next to me or to simply get an ear scratch from time-to-time.

I cannot imagine how hard it is going to be figuring out what to do with your mother. No matter what you do, it is not going to be good. If she stays, she is only going to require more and more supervision but if you move her into a home or retirement community, she is going to feel abandoned. 

Now this is my little piece of advice because I have had custody of my grandson when he was a baby and I spend a lot of time with my daughter's two younger children, but the sooner you can transition the baby back to full-time care of her mother, the better for her, her mother, and you. I suggest that you offer support in other areas such as helping her find child care for those times that she is working on her dissertation or the times she is doing research or teaching. If you are not careful, you are going to create a situation in which she won't learn how to be a single parent and because you raised your girls with your husband being gone so much of the time, you know how important it is to learn how to negotiate that process alone...and the sooner the better.  Your relationship as the baby's grandmother must be developed too and that cannot happen when you are the mother...and I know you are also realizing that your own life has been put on hold enough and it goes without saying that you need to take care of yourself.

Help your daughter by helping her find childcare, helping her pay it, and then you get your house back to being your space and heal...spend time doing the things you like without the interruptions of others. I know that is going to sound harsh but you are not handling any of this very well and it is triggering you to get your hands on sugar...I think it is time for you to do something for Vic... 

Hello Ladies,

I have to tell you that my trip to Denver was way too fast. I took two undergraduates and a graduate tutor with me.  Denver is beautiful and the mountains that are to the north west of the city are beautiful with their snow caps. I was so happy when the conference ended and we drove back...however, when we got to Kansas, our GPS rerouted us through Ks into MO and we couldn't figure out why but we were seeing huge smoke piles in the distance...then, we saw the wild fires...they were close and at a couple of points they were up to the highway. Apparently northern OK and a large portion of the grasslands of Ks burned---400000acres to be exact. I did take pictures and will try to post later. 

Well tomorrow DH has his gall bladder removed, a huge kidney stone removed, his pancreas fixed up, and a biopsy on his liver. We are hoping everything comes back okay...he did tell me that he is feeling better with the medication he is taking...his blood sugar is down to 116 so all is well.  

I will let everyone know what they find as soon as I can. I am not even speculating at this point. 

I would like to tell you about my larger than life walk while in Denver. I met up with some old friends of mine and we wanted to go eat at this incredible French restaurant that we visited a couple of years when we were there for another conference. So, we checked it was about 1 mile from my hotel and they were staying in the same hotel so we decided it would be a good walk...forget that I was a mile higher in elevation than I had been the day before and that I am anemic to the point of needing blood....so we walked the mile there and I hate this incredible bread and butter, then rainbow trout with green beans and sunflower seeds, and a cup of delicious coffee....we waited for an hour and headed back....we got halfway back to the hotel and I became very light headed...I told them I was going to sit for a minute and for them to go ahead and I would catch up...thankfully they didn't leave me because I walked toward a bench and everything went dark...I knew I was about to pass out; one of my friend's husband was there and thankfully he was young and strong and he picked me up like a baby and gently put me on the bench...a total stranger who was also a nurse came up and said, it's the altitude...you don't have enough oxygen....she felt my pulse and she sat there with me and as if everything wasn't perfect enough, a kid on one of those bikes with a little cart behind it came up and said, how far are you going and he drove me and one of my friends to our hotel...he wasn't going to take money from me but I said either he take the money or it would blow out because he helped me tremendously....All was well after that. 

Well, I am glad to be home and the bed is calling me for a nap. 

Ladies, enjoy your day.

Hello Vickie and jeveryone...

Just saying hello to everyone. Using a phone for posting is the pits.

Vickie....I do agree with Jeannie. You need to be a mother and a grandmother.

There are many single mothers out there working and raising their children alone. I was one of those. I had no money and lived in a small apartment. It was hard but I did it. You can't be in charge of your children and grandchildren. They need to make it on their own. They have been given so much. They have  nice places to live and have groceries and clothing. Their children will be fine. Help with daycare when you can. Let your daughters be in charge of their own lives. You be in charge of yours. 

Your mom and you can't live together. She might not like living in senior housing. She will make friends. You have tried your best. You are not letting her down. She will live well. 

I love you and want YOU happy. Take care of your needs. 

The Dog Saga, Part Two

Well, hell.  Carrie and I spent all morning putting that electric fence in place.  And we did a pretty good job of it, too, for not having any idea how to do it in the first place.  But there was a small gap at each end, maybe about 4 or 5 inches.  We thought it would be okay.

So we let the dogs out and after a bit, Lulu got curious and touched her nose to the wire.  Bam!  She yelped and jumped and ran back into the house.  Okay. Lesson learned. And none of the other dogs even went near the new fence.

Couple of hours later I was working in the back yard and here comes that big dog next door, charging the fence.  Lulu ran towards the fence too, but stayed back from the wire.  They were each barking like crazy, but they were apart.  Great!  I thought we had it.  But then Lulu found that little gap at the end and zipped right through it!  I had to reach over and grab her (and got shocked in the process--that was fun) and jerk her back over to the yard.

So I spent another hour figuring out how to block those gaps at the ends.  Bernice came out and Mom told her that she needed to put an electric fence up on HER side, too.  Go Mom!  And it's true.  If both sides had an electric fence the dogs would for sure be kept apart.  I feel like I've done all I can do on my side.  

Besides, I'm a little afraid that big dog might jump the fence.  I told Bernice that, too.  The wrought iron fence isn't high like those wooden privacy fences.  I told her my boys play out here and I don't want to be worried about your dog coming over the fence.

Anyway, I'm done for the day.  I'm going to take a bath and put on some pajamas and try to relax for the rest of the evening.  

And Jeannie, I'm thinking about what you said.  I've already been turning that over in my mind about helping Carrie to pay for day care in Waco.  I think it will depend on whether or not she's going to graduate in August or next December.  If it's August, I think I might can handle things for a few months.  But if it's going to be next December, we're going to have to do something else.  I'll gently broach the subject with Carrie this week and see how she feels about it.  She was pretty upset at being separated from Caralee for three days last week.  She might be re-thinking things herself.

I've done pretty good about sticking to my diet so far today.  I was so mad at myself for eating that chocolate last night.  I didn't eat very much.  Just a small handful of M&M's.  But it's the psychological dependence on chocolate when I get stressed that bothers me so much.  I need a better coping mechanism for sure.

Well, I'm hot and tired and covered in dirt.  It's into the tub with me!

Love you all!