New Years Eve

Happy New Year.

Be right back.

I'm back.

I have to finish packing, and organizing.  I'm also in the middle of washing the bedding I used, coz Kathy's Mom is staying here tonight.  I'll head over to Ellen's, and hang out there for New Years Eve.

Mom and Eileen were here last night.  Things got weird coz Mom and I were talking and it got heated.  Then, my sister kept telling me to drop the subject, but I got tired of her doing that.  She did it on Christmas.  I wanted to help Mom understand something, and it gets heated when she interrupts me, and talks over me.  I told Eileen to stop censoring me.  I relate to Mom my way.  Right or wrong.  We ended up having a good discussion after I got Eileen to back off.

Must scoot.

Hugs,

Trish

Good Morning Trish & OFF Family!

I feel disconnected from the group due to not having time to post! I do read everyday, but my schedule has been whacky! My job is requiring more hours than I anticipated and then all the extra stuff we do around the holidays has really taken up my time.

I, too, am anxious for this week to be over and move into the New Year, but I was blessed in having many high points in 2015...my weight loss being at the top of the list!

However, I have been SO bad the past several weeks, and the past week in particular. Cookies, chocolate...loads of bad carbs! My stomach is definitely telling me to stop although these type crappy foods don't seem to make the restriction any worse. I must get back on track. I am disgusted with this 'binge.'

Gotta love how families interact over the holidays. I got into it via text with my daughter, and I am afraid she will cut me off for yet another year. I don't want to go into detail here b/c I am paranoid of 'stalkers,' but I really cannot control my mouth when I feel Jazz is being affected by her mom's behavior. I question whether I am supersensitive and overreacting, but I don't think so. Dr. Phil says we should never be more concerned about being right, but when morales and principles are involved I have to question that.

Oh well...enuf said.

I wish everyone a Happy New Year...as emotionally and physically painfree as possible!

I gotta run!

Kathy,

I know how big a role stress plays in our food choices and amounts. Our body sends out signals for sweet high energy food to provide us with stores of energy just in case...it's real. Don't beat yourself up over it but make some sound plans for dealing with stressful events. I keep pretzels near me in the car so that when I am stressed, I can eat three or four pretzels and it satisfy the salty craving, the crunchy, and the immediate need. It's better than any other type of chip and definitely better than getting cookies. 

Find some really good safe foods that you can eat in a pinch and keep them at your finger tips. Also, and we have all talked about this but try and avoid the stressors that put you in a state of stress. If that is impossible, learn some quick and easy yoga posses and do some quick meditation. Just working on your neck can cut out a ton of stress...

My psychologists and I have discussed plans for me dealing with my daughter and one of the most important that I have found helpful is for me to avoid texting her. While that won't stop her from texting me, over time, with me not texting her back, she will stop and has. The idea is that when we text, we tend to respond differently than if we were face-to-face or even on the phone. You are like me with your granddaughter. We have to teach our babies strategies that they can use to alert us and how they can avoid conflict with their mothers. My grandkids are old enough they can call me or my sister and can text...they also have an older brother who won't leave them if he thinks my daughter is being too obsessive. They know to retreat to their rooms and let her cool off, which works. Write your plan down and when you are around your granddaughter teach her what she can do.  

Also, you know this; you have to take care of yourself first. There are so many great websites and books that deal with adult children who either abandon their parents or who emotionally abuse their parents and I have benefited so much from reading what others are going through...we are not alone. We should start our own blog so we can support each other...you know? 

Be safe, my friend and Happy New Year to you....

Good afternoon Trish and everyone....

Kathy.... I haven't been posting much either. I try to at least just check in.

My head and my heart is not in it. I am serious when I say I am LOST and cannot find my way back. Don't get me wrong, it isn't that I don't care or don't love you all. You know I do. Something has happened. I see my therapist on the 7th....we will go through it all again. I hope I can start feeling better or at least see a light at the end of the tunnel.

I will check in later when I can. I love you all!!

Prayers for our beautiful OFF Family and their families.

Lots of love and tons of hugs....connie d

Connie

I know how hard it is for you. The cost of all the holiday cheer is bitter sweet for so many of us. I think we can all relate to the idea that when we were young women and had our children and friends and family, we all had enormous amounts of support and love or at least love. Then our children grow up and even on their good days, we are second or third or fourth on their list of people that they decide needs their support. They have their friends and you know, it just seems so fast that we are their worlds and then we become that person that they use for a crutch or an obligation or both. I know you have a good relationship with your children but sometimes the holidays remind us of what was and what is now. 

It's also very hard to open the door when we are so sad and depressed and even though the door here is a cyber door, it is still very hard to open...if all you can do for a while is read, we get it. But, remember that we are here to support you as much as we can and if you are not around a lot of people, you need us...we need you.  I hope your doctor can give you the meds you need to get through this.  

Happy New Year to you and I will check at midnight to see if anyone is on and I will send a special message to you...

Thank you Jeannie.... I really am trying my best.

A lot of painful things have come to mind. 

I love you and I always know you are there for me and so many others.

I wish I could afford to go somewhere warm and regenerate. There is a lot of winter here for us Minnesota people! 

I love you and thanks again you are a very sweet friend!!

Trish,

Good for you. I am so happy that you and your mom had a chance to really talk and I do hope it works.  

Happy New Year to you too

Good morning!  I swear, trying to get my daughter and grandsons out of this house on time is like herding cats!  But I think we are almost there.  I wanted to leave at 9 a.m. and it seems we might get out by 9:30 a.m., so that's not too bad.  

Anyway, I'm shutting down my computer.  It might be a couple of days before I get back to post.  I expect I'm going to be rather busy!  LOL!

Love you all!

Vic,

Have a good visit. Herding cats is about the best description for my daughter too. When she is supposed to come pick the kids up, we know better than to expect her on time...she always has fifty things she has to do on her way up the mountain. Happy New Year....see you in two days.