Sleepless in Michigan

my turn tonight. 

I can't find anything and the meds aren't working.

I'll post more in the morning.

Trish --You are not alone......

First, thanks everyone for your prayers, kind words and support.  They mean a lot to me.  I've been talking to my older brother and his wife, who live in California.  Maura calls too, but she has a lot going on with Taylor and work, she has not been feeling well on top of that. 

I've been doing "the drill".... made arrangements; going through paperwork; sorting through his clothes and belongings; etc.  

I struggle with the fact Jim was estranged from his family.  I believe if I notified his family, I would see them post comments on Facebook about him being no good and he got what he deserved, etc.  They are an amazing group of nasty people.  Jim had one cousin who lives in town, and I've got my fingers crossed that she does not see his death notice in the local paper. I know Jim would not want me to contact them.  

One thing I promised my brother is that I would try to find a church in the area to attend. Over the past several years, I became isolated from other people.  It was basically Jim and I, and Maura and Taylor.  I've got to get back into life and reconnect.  Today's paper will have a list of all the local churches and when they have services.  I found one on the internet that looks like it might meet my needs - they have services with a coffee hour after, plus they have a food bank and cook lunch two days a week, plus they give blankets/clothing, etc. to people in need and send care packages to the military.  They seem to be very active in the community.  I may also check out some Senior Centers.....not that I feel like a "Senior" -- but maybe I can volunteer.  I have to force myself to get out, otherwise, I'll sit alone watching tv and end up getting depressed.

Well, I've written a book -- getting back among my friends.  Again, thank you all for your kindness.  I have been reading the daily posts and see some new members -- Welcome ladies. OFF is a great place to be.

Good wishes to all.

Mary

Dear Mary, thinking of you and sending love. It is a good idea to volunteer at a church. I may do so myself. You were there for Jim and that is a wonderful gesture, out of love, and selfless. Bless your heart.  Arlene.

Hello Mary...so nice to see your post!!

I know you have had a lot to do in a short window of time. Please don't overdo or you are going to crash!! 

I will pray that Jim's cousin doesn't see that notice of Jim's passing. If they do ...you just ignore them. Change your phone number if necessary. Don't let their trash talk effect you. You are an great person and you don't need to here that!!

I am sorry my phone wasn't working or my internet for most of this last week and weekend.I wasn't ignoring you. I think it is all fixed now. Let me know if you still need FB info!!

I am so glad your brother and SIL have been such good sport people for you. It will be good to find a church. You will have a chance to make some new friends too. I would love to know you are not isolating anymore!!

Try to find something pleasant for you to do for yourself. Just a little walk in a park or even just sitting on a park bench. Enjoy the beauty around you!! 

You aren't alone going through this...we are all here for you!!! We love you and want to be here for your support! 

Love you much...hugs...and prayers....connie d

Mary, I pray that Jim's cousin doesn't see the notice in the paper.  If she does and posts negative stuff on FB, just try to ignore it.  Easier said than done, I know. 

Getting out amongst people will be good for you.  Stretching beyond your comfort zone could be a challenge -- but you know what is best for you and are developing an action plan. 

God Bless you, Mary.

Cindy P.

Mary, do check out the senior centers.  You may be pleasantly surprised.  All the ones I know have lots to do.  You may find classes in everything from quilting to belly dancing.  There are often trips scheduled as well, some day trips and even overnighters.  Remember in most places seniors can be as young as 55 and us older folks today enjoy active life styles that our  parents would not have even considered. GET OUT THERE

Good Morning Trish & Mary & all ladies to follow...

Trish, I meant to mention how adorable your grandkids are! I so miss Jasmyn being younger...the innocence is just so sweet at their ages. Now wonder you enjoy them so much.

Not good you joined the 'sleepless club!' I didn't sleep well last night, but I slept. Feeling awhole lot better today than yesterday.

Mary, sorry you are struggling with protecting Jim even in death. There are ppl out there that will not even miss an opportunity to speak poorly of the dead. No respect! As with Vickie, I hope you are able to get thru the arrangements and burial so you have time to think and grieve. This has happened twice now to you where your loved one passed very quickly. No doubt you're in shock, but good your brother is helping you reach out. You are not alone...all of us are here for you. I wish you peace over the next several days.

We finally got some rain last night and it is supposed to be stormy today. We really need the rain...have barely had any all summer...not even a passing storm! I enjoy a good thunderstorm.

I need to pick up Jazz's mom in a few. She is going to do some small projects around here neither Jim or I can do...like wash the bathroom ceiling. I am going to clean the house today so I don't have too much to do tomorrow except last minute shopping. Jim's daughter does not get into Philly until 11pm so I will have the whole day to finish up what I need to do.

Vickie, loved the rug & pictures you & your grandson colored. Too cute!

Cindi, had to giggle about your friend's driving! Jim & argue more about his aggressive driving than anything else. I hate going anywhere w/him! I have made him turn around & take me home on more than one occasion b/c of him 'terrorizing' me by speeding, tailgating, switching lanes back & forth, flipping the bird, etc. Add to that he blasts his 80's heavy metal music like a teenager and driving w/him is no fun. No wonder I am hard of hearing and have high blood pressure!

Eileen, hope you are making headway on your pitching & packing. Too bad your body picks this time to act up! But despite all the hassle it will be good to move and have a new place. End of a chapter!

Connie, you are always so supportive. Haha on don't worry about my cereal binge! I must confess I ate half the box! And wow I may not have had surgery yet, but boy did I pay for it. I hate that sluggish feeling, bad mood, and overall feeling like crap feeling.

Anyway, I know I am forgetting ppl, but I need to head out.

Everyone have a good day!

Good morning Kathy my ray of sunshine!!

So we all had restless lousy sleep again...it needs to stop!!! The only time I sleep really good is when I have to take my Vicodin and that will usually knock me out. Not a good way to do it!!  I pray you get a better night's sleep tonight.

It is nice of Jazz's mom to help you with cleaning. It goes so much faster when you have help.

Silly I wasn't worried about what you ate...I was worried you would be down on yourself because of it!! You are doing just great!!!! 

I need to go for now...I will answer more posts and post for myself when I get back from Grocery shopping. She will be here soon and I need to get dressed!!

Have a lovely day....love and hugs....connie d

Kathy, you don't suppose that Jazz's mom would come to my house and do some cleaning for us?  My go**** seems like the list of cleaning projects goes on and on and I can never get ahead of it all.  We really need to do some sorting of our garage sale pile in the garage and then actually have the sale.  Every time I think we have a good window of opportunity to do it, something comes up and we can't.  Perhaps if I put an ad in the paper, we'd be committed enough to go for it? 

Oh, my hubby likes to drive fast too.  I get really stressed out driving the freeway with him -- it's not as bad here in town.  He thinks that if you're not going seven miles over the speed limit there is something wrong with you.  Not bad in town where the speed limit is slow anyway but very stress inducing on the freeway where the posted speed is 55 to 65 mph.  Sometimes, I do take a tranquilizer before going on a trip!  So, I can totally relate to what you're saying.

Cindy P.

Hello Cindy...you taking a tranquilizer before riding with Ron on the freeway...I really laughed at that!

Love you much....connie d