Thursday is Here!
Good Morning Ladies!
Thursday already...I don't know where the time goes!
Jim & I had an enjoyable day yesterday just doing routine stuff. Jazz was w/her mom so it was just the 2 of us. did our wkly grocery shopping, got our hair cut, had a nice lunch & dinner w/nap in between & started painting our deck last night.
I miss the days that were not devoted to having a child in the house & we could do things at our own pace!
Had planned on taking Jazz & her mom & Jazz's 2 friends to the beach today & meeting my other daughter there (she lives there!), but woke up to rain & really overcast skies & a forecast for storms thru out the day. All wk they forecasted today to be nice & sunny! So change of plans!
Just going to take Jazz out for some clothes w/her mom & chill most of the day...
Trish, read your late night post about traveling & an earache. That really sucks! I hate earaches & toothaches...just want to bang my head against the wall! And I prefer to be home if not feeling well. Sure hope you feel better soon as you have enough on your plate.
Eileen, you run around like crazy! I have never had an MRI & don't know if I could tolerate one. I am SO claustrophobic. Coincidentially I went w/Jim this past Monday as he had one scheduled on his kidney. 1st time I have ever seen the MRI tube 'in person.' NO THANK YOU! I don't know what I would do if I needed one...
Connie, when I go thru down periods I have to keep telling myself 'this too shall pass.' And I pray it does quickly for you. Depression is such an uphill battle...my Jim suffers from Major Depression & I get it in the dark months of Fall & Winter. Knowing you will come out of it helps. We're rooting for you!
Vickie, I really do not know how YOU are holding on this long. I remember the emotional toll it took on me during the bedside vigils for both my parents. I had to go home to my own bed to rest & recharge after a few DAYS...an of course they passed w/out me. So I cannot imagine a month of this. You will not regret the time spent, but keep in mind you are going to need a lot of time to recover physically, mentally & emotionally when this is over.
I am going to hop off for now. Everyone have a great day!
Kathy
Hey Kathy and Ladies,
This is my Friday and I am so ready. I woke up this morning with shingles...damn it. I thought I had some of the medicine that they give me left or at least a refill but nope, so I called the doctor and they are calling me stuff in. My left arm is killing me and the entire left side of my face. But, shingles is pretty easy to control, so I am glad it is just shingles.
I, too, admire Vic's strength and wonder where she gets all this from. I suspect, from what I read in her last post, he is now not drinking water so much and that, as we all know, is a sign of the end. For Vic's and the girls' sake, I hope he doesn't dwell too long in that last phase.
Well, here I am complaining about shingles when so many of you have far worse. Peace, guys and I hope your day is good.
Hello Kathy and everyone....
I am glad you and Jim had a nice day together yesterday. You sure got enough done!!! 
Sorry the rain has spoiled your beach day. Shopping for clothes for Jazz...always fun!! You must get along well with her mom. That is a good thing.
I have had a MRI before...I can't stand being in there!! I was partially sedated, blindfolded and had music playing in my ears. I still panicked. I can't have anymore as now I have a metal implant in my ear. No metal in an MRI...it would pull it out!
I have S.A.D. too...every fall and winter. I am okay usually the rest of the year with just little flare ups now and then. This is no little flare up!! I know why it has happened....now I just have to work through it. Laying low today....reading if I can focus.
I know you all understand if I don't reply to everyone. I love you all!!!! 
NOTHING but walking planned for today. I will check in again later.
Continuing with love and prayers for Vickie and Butch. They are awesome!!
Prayers for our amazing OFF Family and their families. Some special prayers on the way too.
Much more love and many more hugs to you...connie d
Hi Kathy...I only can have cat-scans...pray nothing goes wrong and I need an MRI. They are working on another kind of MRI because there are a lot of people can't have the original one. That is what a couple of my doctors told me.
My day sucks...thanks for asking. I am just trying to keep busy. I just balanced my check book and paid my cable, rent (which I pay a month ahead), electric, and renters/health/life insurance. My daughter pays for my phone. That is it for this month except for groceries and things like that. I live pretty simply.
Love and lots of hugs to you...connie d 
Hi Kathy and my OFF family:
Yeah, I woke to rain too but no thunder and lightning, although we had that last night. The White Sox-Cardinals game was interrupted by two rain delays and didn't get over until after 1 a.m. ... needless to say, I stayed up until the end, although I was started to nod off then. The White Sox, uncharacteristically this year, won 7-1 to sweep the first-place Cards. So I was happy. But then I didn't sleep all that well for some reason. I got up to my screeching cats alarm on my phone and dozed off for another 45 minutes before I dragged myself out of bed so I could get to the Y. No lightning, so I went and enjoyed the arthritis class, even though I'm sleepy now. I have tomorrow off for the holiday. I guess I can make it through tonight.
I wasn't able to get MRIs when I was 355 lbs., Kathy, and I'm not claustrophobic, just can't stand being cramped for that long. Especially recently. Last night, of course, my left elbow started acting up on me along with a few other body parts.
I guess I should work. I need to concentrate on something or I'll nod off here at my desk. Have a good day.
Hello dear sistas,
Today is more of the same. Sort of. Butch has been mostly unresponsive all day. He did awaken this morning and really wanted to get out of bed. And he kept calling for me. "Hey, Vic!" And I would say, "I am here." And he would look confused and call for me again. But a couple of moments he did know me, and whenever that happens I get such a sweet smile from him. Moments to freeze in time.
I have had a lot of company the past 24 hours. Butch's brother and his wife came yesterday and spent the night here in the hospice house with me. Butch's blood pressure dropped to 60/40 last night, and again, we all braced ourselves. But he has had higher BP all day today. However this is the third day without more than a tiny sip of water, and his urine output is almost negligible, and his poor ravaged body is running fever. It just cannot be much longer.
Anyway, today I had a special blessing. My sweet Aunt Kay and Uncle Wally came to see me. They had planned to come last week, but had some health issues and couldn't make it. So they came today and took me out to lunch, and I just cried and cried with them. Butch's family is and has been wonderful to me through all of this year, but today I got to be with some of MY family, and it meant the world to me. Aunt Kay was (is?) my dad's baby sister. I love her dearly.
So tonight sister Lisa is coming back to stay with me, and I suspect Rusty and Judy will stay also. We all just feel like Butch's departure is imminent, but he keeps surprising us. Tomorrow his brother Sandy and wife Karen (the ones we always stayed with in Houston when we were going to MDA) will be here. And Carrie is coming tomorrow as well. It's just so hard to wait and wait and wait like this. Everyone wants to help and no one really knows what is going to happen when. But they are a solid base of support for me, and for that I am so grateful. It's just that every now and then I long for my own family to be with me, you know?
Well, I don't have any other news. I'm experiencing some pretty unpleasant side effects from my poor diet and all the stress. I have dumping syndrome almost daily, but then I am drinking Cokes again (dammit) and eating sweets and what else can I really expect? And I've started to have little dizzy spells. It's just stress. I know it is. My vision will start to swim in my left eye and then I'll have the vertigo. It's unpleasant, but I think it will go away when things finally settle down again. At least I hope so. I really do not want to deal with any health problems right now.
I do plan to take some time to myself after the funeral and all is over. I'm going to rent a condo down on the coast and spend some days there. I've already told my mom and the girls and all the Poe siblings. I just need to have that time alone to process this horrible past year and to grieve and to try and regain my footing. Then I will come home and resume my life as Mom and Mimi and daughter and I will eventually be just fine. I bought my new little house with the expectation of living out my days there alone, and I'm ready for that. I'm really glad that I got that move behind me last spring. I will be okay. Butch left me in good shape financially and I will be okay emotionally, too. I have many things to look forward to, and Butch will always be right there with me in my heart. I just have to get past this part. It's plumb awful for things to drag on and on like this, but even now I can see small glimmers of blessings that are going to come from this ordeal. God can take the most awful situations and make good come from them. We just have to have faith and know that everything happens for a purpose.
Well, I will close for now. I'm going to try and take a little nap before Lisa arrives. Not much sleep last night. Probably won't be much sleep tonight either. I love you all!
Vickie
Hello Vickie...oh honey..I would do anything for you to make this easier for you. I hate you having to go through this. It breaks my heart. 
Things have been very, very hard for you especially the last few months. I am so glad your Aunt Kay and Uncle Wally were there for you today. I am so relieved to know you had some part of "your" family there. I do understand that need. I am happy you got to have lunch with them and have the opportunity to release some of the feelings you are dealing with. God Bless them for being there for you!!
I do know that Butch's family loves you and treats you well. I am so thankful for them. I am thankful for Butch for being such a wonderful husband to you.
I am hoping you did manage a little nap before Lisa arrived.
I am sending more prayers and many hugs and lots of love to you.
It just can't be much longer...God Bless Butch. His fever, not drinking, and his BP dropping so low is pretty normal at this time. Jesus is there....lean on him....he understands.
I thank God for putting you in my life every day. As always...and I am sure you are sick of hearing this...but...I really am here for you at any time for any reason. I love you like a sister.
Take care...you know you can count on our precious OFF Family for comfort. We love you so much.
I will be checking in as I do off and on throughout the day and night.
Always love and more hugs....connie d
