Crappy Tuesday (sorry!)

Ugh.  Well, I'm up at 3 a.m. and can't go back to sleep.  Sore throat, itchy eyes and ears, stuffed up head, and the headache from hell.  Cheerful good morning to you all!

Sorry, I'm feeling lousy and more than a wee bit sorry for myself right now.  Let's start over:

Good morning, sistas!

Like I said, not feeling my best right now.  I have to admit, I'm not surprised that my immune system gave it up and let me get sick.  I certainly haven't been taking the best care of myself lately and all the stress of the move and Butch's illness has taken its toll.  If only I had the luxury of staying in bed, but I don't.  So many appointments and obligations this week.  What else can I do but power through?  There's no one else to do it all but me.

Well, now that sounded pitiful, too.  Geez.  I'm usually not so whiny.

So, yesterday I took my mom to the bank.  She needed to go last week, but of course, I spent last week at the hospital with Butch.  Anyway, my mom is a very sharp lady.  She watches every penny and she understands money and banking very well.  (She worked in a bank for years.)  BUT--she's old school.  I took her to Bank of America to open a new account because that's where I bank and both my girls bank there, and it's just easier if we all use the same bank, you know?  She absolutely refuses to even look at a computer, much less embrace on-line banking.  It was quite an experience, let me tell you.  That young Hispanic guy who was helping us didn't know what to make of Mom!  She asked him some very  sharp questions, and it was so obvious that in his training, he had never been taught "old school" banking.  LOL!  Anyway, I am always on all of her accounts (and have been since I turned 18--ask me if I would have ever done that with MY daughters!  Oy vey!), and I kept telling both of them, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it from home on the computer."  My mom trusts me, of course, but I can tell she's worried about a hacker getting into her account.

Well, then we had to go to the post office.  We haven't received any mail since last Wednesday.  Again, I was at the hospital with Butch and didn't have time to go check it out.  'Bout to drive Mom up the wall.  So, it turns out that the people who used to live here called and put a "hold" on the mail.  Now, I don't recall if I've mentioned that these dumb clucks didn't leave a forwarding address when they moved out?  I've been getting all their mail for the past few weeks.  (Which is just stupid, you know?  Who moves without leaving a forwarding address?)  But instead of asking the post office to FORWARD their mail, they put a HOLD on the address?  I ask you--how is that even possible?  They don't live here anymore!  So they bring out this tub of mail and we have to go through it and pull out our stuff and resubmit the form saying who lives here now and to PLEASE deliver our mail and hold THEIRS.  (And the USPS wonders why people prefer email?)

I should have gone out to the lake house and hooked up the trailer and gone into San Antonio and picked up my patio furniture yesterday afternoon, but I just couldn't do it.  I slept all afternoon, got up and watched the news, fixed Butch a bite of supper (he wanted biscuit and gravy), and went right back to bed.  Geez, I feel lousy.  And I'm so afraid to get near him for fear I'll give this crud to him.  

That's all we need.

Well, let me briefly tell the saga of Christie and Mike.  For once, I think my daughter is entirely justified in her actions, although I would handle things a bit differently if it were me.  I'm sure y'all realize what a financial struggle this young couple has been having to afford day care and groceries and pay their bills.  They never seem to have enough money to make ends meet.  Well, when Mike's grandmother died in February, it seems that she left Mike $6000.  But Mike chose to hide it from Christie, and while they spiraled deeper and deeper into the hole, he just never said a word about it.  I didn't know it, but Christie started taking out those pay day loans trying to rob Peter to pay Paul.  OMG.  You can NEVER get out from under those things!  And they got behind on the daycare, the electricity, the water, etc.  Mike had the wherewithall to have avoided all of that, but he jus****ched it happen.  Chris borrowed money from us, from her sister, from the payday loan place, and then took a second job, trying her best to pay all the bills and that SOB just let her do it.

So, when all of this came to light last week, she told him that they were done.  And in some ways, I don't blame her at all.  You can't have a relationship without trust and honesty (much less commonsense and brains), and she feels he lied and betrayed her and the boys.  BUT--and this is where I would have handled it differently--I would not have kicked him out until he helped dig them out of that hole!  But Chris never can sit on her emotions.  Anyway, Mike has moved out and it's a big royal mess right now.  And they both work at the same place, so that's tough, too.  And he keeps calling me, telling me one thing, but then Chris says he tells her another, so I don't know what to believe.  I just want to protect the boys as much as possible and stay the hell out of the rest of it.

And my poor sweet Carrie!  Y'all remember that her ******* of a boyfriend broke up with her on a text?  Ass.  That was bad enough.  Well, it seems he drove by her house the other night and saw two cars parked in her driveway and leapt to the conclusion that she was "entertaining" someone.  Well, hell.  The second car is my mom's.  Carrie drove it to Waco from Nacogdoches when we moved a few weeks ago.  Anyway, I guess it fired up his jealousy or something because he showed up at her door the next day.  Now, it's not my place to disclose someone else's private life, but let me just say that first he talked her into going to bed with him (i.e., he came back in and established his "rights" to her), and then he calmly told her that he still didn't see things working out between them and they had no future together.  *******!!!  It's really rare for me to say I hate someone, but I HATE that boy!  I haven't told any of this to Butch.  He would be so upset.  Like me, he would want to drive up to Waco and kicked that sorry ass into next week.

Well, that's what is happening with my girls.  And y'all know what is happening with Butch.  And my mom keeps apologizing for "being a burden" to me.  And frankly, sistas, I'm about ready to just run away from home.  Of course, I can't do that.  But not even Calgon can "take me away" from this mess I find myself in.

All I want to do is unpack my stuff, settled into my new house, and sew curtains and cushions.  Ha!  Not bloody likely, huh?

Well, I've griped and whined enough.  I have much to do today, so I'd better suck it up and get it done.  I need to go get the trailer from the lakehouse this morning and go get my new outdoor furniture.  Chris is off this morning and she can help me unload it.  Then I have my well woman exam this afternoon.  And then I plan to collapse again.

I hope everyone is safe from all the horrific weather today.  We had terrible tornados in Texas yesterday.  I'm glad I don't live in tornado alley.  I can ride out a hurricane without blinking an eye, but I've never been in a tornado and hope to never experience one!  

I read every day and think about y'all way more than you can possibly know.  I've been a rather selfish poster this past several weeks, never responding to anyone else's posts.  I hope to get back to normal soon.  Love you all!

Good Morning Vickie and everyone.....

Oh Vickie...lets run away. That sounds wonderful to me!!

OMGoodness how are you dealing with all this crap? You do not sound whiny!! Anyone else would be in a locked unit at the hospital after the weeks you have been having!!!!! 

I am glad you finally got your mom to the bank even if she doesn't feel very secure about her money.That bank employee was probably very confused. I am sure he didn't know what your mom was talking about at times.

As for Leo and Mike....GRRRRRRRR!!! I seriously would have kicked their ass and a few other things as well. I tell you men are getting worse all the time. They know nothing about women or relationships!! I think Carrie should think seriously about getting a order of protection. She is young and he probably sweet talked her. I pray she never speaks to him again!!!! What a jerk!! Then their is Mike!! Oh Boy!! He is so fortunate that I don't live close by. I would do more the same to him (like Leo). He really has no clue. I feel so bad for Budder and Benny too. I am sure he will want visitation. What a horses a$$!! Who knows what else he has been up too. Chris better check her accounts!! I am so sorry this is happening with everything else that is going on!! I always pray for your family.  Mike should give her money for bills he made and 1/2 the daycare for Budder.

I wish I could be of more help. You know I would if I could.

You are not being selfish....we all know what you are doing!!

I will continue to keep Butch and you in my daily prayers!

As for me.....well I went to bed at 8:30 PM last night. I was so exhausted and in  too much pain to think straight. I slept all of 45 minutes and the neighbor next to me (our bedrooms connect) was in bed. I know because her bed squeaks so loud I always know when she turns over or gets up. She was on her phone screaming and crying to someone. This went on and on. I finally got up and have not yet gotten back to bed. 

I don't have a clue what I will be doing today. No appointments so hopefully I can sleep at some point!! 

I will check in later....I hope you get to do all you want to get done today! Please take a bit of time for yourself. Have a cool drink and sit outside for 15 minutes...it will do you good.

I love you much...gentle hugs to you....connie d

Oh, goodness, Connie!  If I had known you were up, I would have just called you!  I'm so sorry your neighbor kept you up all night.  Geez, I would have been tempted to bang on the wall and yell for her to quiet down.

I sure hope you get a nap today.  

I am going to take a hot bath in the walk-in tub and get dressed for the day.  My schedule is hopelessly screwed today.  Nothing I can do about it at this point but muddle through.

Love you, sista!

Vickie...that neighbor is so paranoid, has chronic depression and she is major bi-polar!!  She will come out screaming!!! She gets so violent and mean! No one can ever touch her door or handle. I wish she would move. She got evicted out of the other building so she came here. I wish she would move again!!

I am done with my walk...that made me tired....now I am going to try to sleep again. Even a couple hours will help!!!

Love you much...HUGS....connie d

Vic,

I see why Chris kicked Mike to the curb. I was a single mother and spent some time working an extra job to make ends meet or to buy my kids' Christmas or birthday gifts.  I know how tiring it is to spend more time at work that at home, so she is so justified in kicking him out.  How could he sit on that money and watch their life spiral out of control?   However, I am like you; I would have taken his money to catch up and pay back those who helped us and then kicked his sorry ass to the curb.   And poor Carrie, I think the guy she loves is a narcissist and enjoys hurting her.   I know  how hard it is to give advice to our kids but if my Meagan were in that situation, I would tell her that a man like that is dangerous and his stalking her and then getting mad because he thought she was seeing someone is a classic sign of control but to cap it off with him doing the last part and walking away again...narcissist. 

My sister is like your mom.  She is in her mid 70s and she does not do online anything and recently, I helped her get debit card because she likes to order from those stores that still send out catalogues but some only take online orders...so no more sending checks in the mail. My DH spent Sunday afternoon trying to teach her how to use her debit or credit card online...she finally said, I'll call you and you do it for me.   Bless her heart. 

Well, DH and I spent half of mother's day with my daughter and the last half we spent with my sister (the one I mentioned above).  Then, around 8:00PM we headed home and drove straight into a tornado...My daughter called us and said, Mom please tell me you are not driving in this and I said, yes and she told us which way it was headed (she saw it on TV) and so I drove away from the damn thing and the detour took us an added thirty minutes to get home.   Winds were hitting us at 70 MPH...let me just say that my DH was having a heart attack.   I'm happy he couldn't see the clouds that I could see.    

Well, today is a crappy Tuesday for sure.   I am meeting with my deans and I always hate doing that because this is the time of the year I submit my yearly budget and justify the budget.   Our financial needs for this coming up academic year are way exceeding what they have been in the past because I am hiring an assistant and a technology person which added almost 80,000 dollars and I am adding a communication specialists who will add another 30,000.  Then my regular tutor budget has been upped to 79,000.  One of my tutors is blind and he needs special software (he is an ESL specialists who will create resources for our OWL) anyway, my budget looks crazy...but I can justify the entire thing.   I just get really nervous about budgets and money because my education is in the humanities and not business and I often feel like the deans and administrators of our department think I am wasteful with money which isn't true.   They never turn me down and I did write a proposal for a tuition increase to pay for my department which turned out adding millions to our budget so much so that we are now supporting two other departments with that money but still....I stress.

Ladies, I hope you all have a better Tuesday than I project mine to be.   

Jeanne, I'm glad you were able to avoid tthat tornado!  I would have been scared to death.  Good luck with your budget meeting today. I worked in academia for 15 years. I understand the stress you are feeling. You can do it!  Whoever said money is the root of all evil knew what he was talking about, huh? You just go in there and wow 'em with your preparedness! 

Hello Jeannie...I agree Leo is a narcissist!! I hope Carie never talks to him again! Mike can just go and enjoy his money. He should be ashamed. Keeping that money and not even paying any bills. I guess he doesn't realize it is his child he is hurting the most!! 

I am glad you didn't end up driving into the tornado!!! God was watching out for you! 

You will do great in the meeting with the Dean. I am sure your budget will be perfect!! You do so much good for the staff and students. You deserve the extra money!!! 

I am going to crash now....45 minutes of sleep all night is not enough for me!!!!  

Lots of love and hugs to you.....connie d

MEN!!    Well, "MOST" MEN, not all of them.  But the bums in your daughters' lives can't even be called men -- they are Losers, Weasels, Rats, Pieces of Sh*t, I could go on and on.  The Poe Women are sure going through hell this past year - I pray for all of you, and will continue to do so.  "Why do bad things happen to good people?"

Once things resolve with Jim, I swear I will never get in another "relationship" again.  I don't want to be anyone's "mother" and I don't want anyone trying to put me on a leash.  I will never co-habit with a man again!!  I've discovered I can do very well on my own. Sure, it would be nice to have a dinner companion, and someone to swing a hammer for me once in a while in exchange for a home-cooked meal, but that's about it.  At this stage in my life, I don't need to shoulder other people's self-made burdens.  

You all remember last week I went down to NY to visit with family, and some pictures were taken, and I'm posting one I was able to copy, along with my pre-op pictures....... Needless to say, I am very proud of myself.  Now I have to get off my a$$ and get to goal.  

 The pictures show up on my computer -- hope they show up here.

Hello Mary....the pics showed up for me....I love the wall color!! You look awesome!! You need to believe in yourself. Get out there and do something fun this week...just for you!!! 

Thanks for sharing the pictures!! 

Love and loads of love to you....connie d 

Thanks Connie -- the pictures were taken at my daughter's place.  My place is all paneling (which I plan on painting.)