Happy Monday Morning...what is new?

Hi Connie and my OFF family:

It's my Friday but it'll be busy because of the national championship game for college football ... late story, late game. Will be hectic at the end. 

Connie, swinging chickens for you and Nic.

Not much going on here. Last night was OK. Tired today but all right. It rained yesterday and is raining today. My body doesn't like rain. 

Anyway, hope everyone else is OK. Have a good day.

Hi Eileen....thank you for the swinging chickens!! I appreciate that so much.

I hope your night is organized and falls into place easily tonight!!

Love to you and HUGS too...connie d

Sorry Eileen that you have to work late tonight!!! But I just want to say GOOOOOOOOOO BUCKEYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I hope they win tonight!!!!! LOL

Hope your weather changes soon so you feel better!!!!

HUGSSSSSSSSSSSS

hello sweet sistas,

We are still in the ER waiting for the x Ray results.  Butch is napping a bit.  I am so thankful that the pain has lessened enough for him to sleep.  He's so terribly frail and weak right now.  I can just see him slipping further and further down.  It's killing me. 

So I have made a difficult decision this morning but I haven't had the nerve to voice it yet.  I think we b have to back out of buying that house.  Oh I hate to even think about doing it.  We have never backed out of a deal before in our lives.  But it just feels really wrong to me right now.  Butch is so walk and frail and I'm very much afraid we are in the final stages.  He might have a month left it he might have a year,  But either way he's not going to be able to garden and raise animals the easy we had planned.  And I don't want to do it without him! I like the house but I don't want to have to keep all that land and equipment.  It's one thing to live on a farm with Butch; it's quite another to live h there by myself.  I just don't think I can do it.  But how on earth do I tell him that without causing him hurt and distress? He'll think I've given up on him. And what do I say to the realtor?  Oh this is such a mess butI think I have h to do it.  What do y'all think?  Any advice? Opinions?

Oh my Vickie....such a hard, hard decision to make. I know you and Butch really had hopes of having that place. Personally, I think you have made a wise decision to end it. I was worried about you and all that equipment, garden,mowing and animals. I know you feel bad about letting the the house go. You just can't do everything honey. You are only one person. Telling Butch will be hard. I think he knows with his health he can't do what it takes to keep it up either. Just let him know he isn't letting you down. Keep positive as you can. Pray on it tonight. God is there listening. Don't let the guilt of this decision wear you down. I love you and will continue to pray.

Much love and oodles of hugs....connie d

Vic...HUGSSSSSSSSSSS I think I would do the same thing right now...BACK OUT. When Butch is better...IF he gets better...there WILL be another house for you. Now is not the time to buy that house. You can't do it alone. I am sure they will ALL understand. If they Don't...shame on them!! We are all here for you...NEVER forget that!!!! I am sure Butch will understand...he is a good man. GOD Be with you both....PRAYERS and More PRAYERS!!!!!!!

HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Hi there. I have read your blogs, ladies, yes a lurker, and was touched by many of your stories. My dear Vicki, you are so strong to confront your husband's illness in the manner you have.  I am older than you, 66, and I would be too busy crying my eyes out. I am divorced. I have a cousin slowly dying of cancer, but he is 78 years old and has lived a long life.  Still I pain for him. Please know there are people praying for you and Butch. God bless.

Arlene G

Thank you Arlene and welcome! it is so sweet of you to post. I will pay for your cousin.  Cancer is a monster.  so many of us are fighting it. Please keep posting. 

Dear Vicki: always wondered about the wisdom of buying another house and moving at a time when Butch's cancer requires all your energy. But you have always had so much more energy than the rest of us! So figured you were doing what you thought best for the both of you.  

Go with your gut feeling is the best advice I can give.  You need to be there for Butch, and have space and down time for yourself, or you will get terribly rundown physically and emotionally...don't complicate your life needlessly in this super stressful time if you can get out of the purchase without monetary penalties. If your penalties will be too onerous to break the purchase agreement, can you flip the house? Or can you financially carry both houses, neglecting both properties as you concentrate on Butch and his treatments?  Now is the time to check you are JOINT owner of all your bank accounts, property, etc, to avoid unnecessary taxes.

Make sure nothing is exclusively in Butch's name, use your Power of Attorney for Finances to make yourself JOINT owner, don't rely on "communal property"to cover you in the event of worst case scenario. Talk to a an Estate Planning lawyer asap to make sure you have all bases covered as his pension will  be halved in worst outcome, and you will have to cope with reduced income for all your expenses. Not so good  if you have to pay taxes and upkeep on multiple properties. 

Again, only you can make these decisions re buying the new property. Go with whatever seems best for you . My heart goes out to you, so many decisions for you to make, including Butch's health planning. Wishing you tons of energy and courage.

hugs,

jennifer