My Just In Case I Regain Dress

After work, I went to the grocery store, and my hubby, who is about to get another transplant and who has really bad diabetes, sits down and waits for me.   I walk all over the huge super center and I push my cart and I stand in line and I think how wonderful that I can do all of this walking because not that many years ago, I couldn’t walk from the car to the door of the store without sitting down on a bench. 

 

 

I have a point to this madness, and it is simple.  Years ago, when I weighed over 500 pounds, I could barely move.  And my best friend and I began talking about marriage and even though I weighed so much, he and I still talked about it.   I began walking a little and eating better and from over 500 pounds, I dropped down to 300.  But I could not lose any more weight. No matter what I tried; no matter how little I ate or how much I moved, and finally, I began gaining weight and was creeping upon 350 pounds so I knew I had to do something or I was going to lose all that weight I had lost.  So I had weight loss surgery and while it hasn’t been easy for me, I have kept the weight off. 

 

While I was in the grocery store, running around, thinking I was just about the cutest 58-year-old chick in the store, I saw who I was.  She was probably in her late thirties and she was riding on one of those mobile devices that they have in Wal-Mart and that are never charged.  Her belly hung almost to her feet and her side fat hid the seat beneath her.   She had that look that I remember having whenever my son would take me to the grocery store so late at night that I could avoid the “normal” people.  I smiled at her and she suspiciously smiled back.  I say how are you and she says fine.   I say I’m glad the weather is warming up and she says me too.  Then a young woman walks over with a frown as if she thinks that she may have to defend her mother.  I smile at her and say it would be nice if they kept these things charged, and she says yeah.   Then I say when I had to use one of these things, my son would call in advance and ask them if they would plug one up so it would not run out of electricity.  She says did you have a health problem and without hesitation, I say well, yes.  I weighed over 500 pounds as a result of being confined to a wheelchair.  The daughter says you weighed over 500 pounds, and I say yep.  She looks at her mother, whose mouth is wide open.   I say yes, I lost down to 300 by walking a little and trying to stay on a 1500 calorie diet but my body began accommodating that diet and I started gaining the weight back so I had WLS.  The daughter, who was by far the most curious, says my mom has Medicare.  I say the doctor who did my wls takes Medicare, but fortunately for me, I had insurance too.  I also say to her there are doctors, I think, in Little Rock who takes Medicare.   The mother says I would love to have wls.  I say come to obesity help and check everyone’s story out.   Do some research.  Talk to your doctor.   She says omg, I have been so fat for so long, I cannot imagine.  I say imagine, you can do it.   I gave her my card and told her to call me and if there was anything I could do, I would try.   I get a call about an hour ago and it’s the daughter and she tells me her mom is so excited with the prospect of losing weight that she has not stopped talking.  She also says that she and her brother have agreed if Medicare will not fund the surgery, they are going to pay for it.   I told her it may well save her mother’s life. 

 

Then I remembered the box in my closet and I went and pulled the box out and my sweet hubby says what the hell are you doing and I say looking for my blue jean moo moo (a moo moo that I loved and that was a 5 XXXX and it was made out of denim and was the closest thing to blue jeans that I would get into until after wls.  I hold it up and hubby says, I thought you burned all those clothes and I say I didn’t burn anything.  I gave them to people, but this I kept.  He says, what are you going to do. I say make a phone call so I call my new friend back and say, I have a dress that I saved, and I think your mom can wear it.  Tomorrow, other than pictures that I never look at, I am getting rid of the last thing from my super morbid obesity days and I cannot think of a better way to end my obsession with holding on to that one dress just in case than to give it to a skinny woman who is about to bust out of that prison she is in.   Lou, if you drop by the forum, welcome and jump in and say hi to us all.  If you are a little hesitant, lurk.   

Aloha Jeannie....so great to see you posting. I LOVE the seeds that you planted in that woman that could not only save her life, but give her freedom in her body, her mind and her spirit. I, too, often see women who look like I used to look.......BIG and confined to a wheeled machine in stores. I try not to look at them with distain, but sometimes it's hard. I KNOW how they are feeling, and want so much to encourage them to get WLS. I work at the hospital, and am always amazed at how many nurses are HUGE, and have trouble just navigating the hallways and stairs. When it comes up that I used to weigh well over 300 lbs., and now weigh around 140, they can't believe it. I forget sometimes to be grateful for the whole person I'VE lost and no longer have to carry around, and struggle with stairs, cars, restaurants, airplane seats, etc.

Keep us updated on this new friend....I so hope that she finds a way to get WLS and a life free of all that "luggage."

Aloha nui loa,

Karen

Good morning Jeannie!!!

I am so happy to see you here today! I love to read your posts!!

What a wonderful thing you did for that lady. I hope she does come and join us here on OFF.She sounds like a very nice lady. She would fit in well. I wish her the best of everything!!

I pray all is going well for you. Have a great day my friend!!

Love and hugs to you.....connie d

Jeanne,

Thanks for this wonderful post.

 

I sure hope your friend finds her way to stopping in and finding that there are many people who once were largely invisible to the society we live in, except for the stares of others who wanted to see what the "fat person" was eating, or the snide comments that people said just loud enough to make us feel really small. . .  Today I see obese people and want to go up to them and share what life was like before WLS and what it is like today, whenever an opportunity presents itself, I willingly share my experience and while I have not maintained my lowest numbers, I am still 70 lbs. less than I was 6 years ago and am living my life in a manner that is healthy and engaging.  I am going to the gym and here is a real biggie for me. . .  while I've never developed a love of working out, I have, because of a temporary situation, not been able to get to the gym, like I had gotten back into the habit of doing and it has caused me irritation not to be able to go (so I go when I can), after next week I will be back to my normal routine. . .  I have absolute faith that I can take off the 20 lbs. that stands between me and my personal goal, it's just a matter of right choices and exercise, either way, I am living today, not sitting on the sofa wistfully wishing for my life to be different. . .

Have a great day!

Laureen

Jeannie

WOW!  That story has inspired me and I'm already in the process toward wls!  I so want that feeling that I am the cutest 50 something i nthe place!  I don't ever remember weighing less than 160 pounts and I'm 5'3''. And that was in 9th grade at that!!  I hope your new friend works her way in here because I have only been around for a few weeks and I already feel like one of the family!  : )   It helps so much to have other people to ask questions of that have been through this and know exactly how you feel.  Keep up the good work and I look forward to hearing more about your new friend.

Take Care

Karen

Perhaps God knew all along what wonderful good you could do with that dress! What a great story - you are blessed that you have the good sense to recognize what you've accomplished and how good you feel, and blessed with the compassion and the encourage to reach out to Lou when it was needed - and Lou is blessed as well. Thank you.