From a Piece of Work: It's my surgeryversary!

Tomorrow is my surgeryversary.  I usually try and account for all the things that I can do that I couldn’t do previous to surgery, but this year, I think I am going to review the last five years. 

Before my surgery, my highest weight was over 500 pounds.  After losing down from 500 pounds to 339 pounds without surgery, I realized that I was not going to lose another pound, so I began doing research, found this site and started my paperwork for our insurance.  Before surgery, I took blood pressure medication, oral medication for diabetes, heart medication to strengthen my heartbeat, and theophyllin for breathing.  I could barely walk and struggled to find a chair that I could fit into.  I could never sit in a booth because, well, my large abdomen got in the way.  I was the largest person in my family, probably the largest person in our town, and I remember the looks from people I met in public.  My husband and I still talk about the time that we were at walmart and these two women kept looking at me and shaking their heads.  One said something and they both laughed.  My husband is usually a very quiet and peaceful man, but he looked at the two women and said, excuse me, do you have something you want to say?  Embarrassed by his confrontation, they walked to the far end of the store.  Even today, fat jokes still **** me off as do any other joke that depicts groups of people in a negative light. 

I can do many things today that pre surgery I never thought possible.  Today I can and do run, hike, dance, jump rope, bend, stoop, squat, and walk for ever without tiring.  I wear a size 6 pants and that is a size 6 without elastic.  I would wear a smaller size if I didn’t have all of this awful hanging skin. 

This journey hasn’t been easy for me.  I was on a ventilator after surgery.  Even though I got out of the hospital on Sunday and went back to teaching on Monday, every step that I took felt like I had a hundred pound weight on each foot.  I thought I would never get my strength back, but I did and it was the kind words of Karen, Jan, Judy, Eileen, Margo, Darlene, and many others who said you will feel better—and I did feel better. 

I did have other complications: an ulcer that went undiagnosed for a year.  In that year the ulcer went from my pouch to my redesigned small intestine, and by the time they found the ulcers, I had lost down to 100 pounds.  They hospitalized me, put in a feeding tube, and began helping me gain the weight back.  I eventually had revision surgery in which they gave me a little larger pouch, and some extra small intestine.  Finally, they were able to take out my tube-feeding button and I gained up to 145—I won’t gain any more.  I have been cleared for plastics but my husband has been battling prostate cancer and last month, his eyes began bothering him.  They checked them and found that he had really bad cataracts.  The surgeon began removing the cataract on the right eye and found that he had something beside the cataract.  He is now on the transplant list to get two corneas.  He has a condition called Fugh’s syndrome.  He has been here for me in sickness and in health, so my plastics will be put on hold until he gets his corneas and recovers.  He keeps telling me to have the plastics, and I keep telling him to let me decide about that. 

In spite of all the problems that I have had, I would do the surgery again and have never regretted my decision to have WLS.  In the five years since surgery, I have  finished my doctorate and have a full appointment at UARK in Fayetteville—go hogs.  In addition, I have travelled all over the country and outside of the country, running through air ports, carrying my laptop and purse and pulling my luggage and never once lagging behind my travel companions. 

Today, I was leaving my office and caught my reflection in my window.  I stood there looking at myself, and for the first time in many, many years, I was happy at not just my reflection but at my accomplisments, at my life.  

I realized, like many of you, that I can manage without the encouragement from my friends here on the board.  My wls is successful and so coming here is more about saying hi to old friends and I do that in the private message section.  But, I have found that in spite of the negativity that I find on this forum (and I’m not the only one who feels this way) I can still come on here and connect with my old friends in private message and on here to a limited degree.  When I see new people who are either about to have surgery or who have had surgery, and they ask a question that I can answer, I do my best to provide information.  In the last few days, I have been called opinionated and small minded, and it was even said that having a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.  I don’t’ necessarily claim to be brilliant, but I do have two bachelors, a masters, and a PhD.  I teach at a R1 University and have taught both English and Latin.  My colleagues would argue against the comments made about my mind being small or that I am hypersensitive.  I try not to get involved in the day-to-day discussions on this board unless there is a topic that I can improve someone’s knowledge base.  Because this is a weight lose forum, it does bother me when people use this as a place to spread political or religious propaganda, and I am not happy when I read racists jokes. So, yep, I do open my mouth and cry foul.   So, this is my fifth year anniversary, and to all of those who I consider my friends, I will be back and to all those that I consider small minded and somewhat rednecked, I will be back.  

 

((((Jeannie))) CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You made it to 5 years along with me and its been one hell of a ride for you my friend!!!! WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!!!! We have had our battles but we have been there for each other over the years!!! I hope we will be there for each other in the years to come!!!!

I hope your hubby will get his transplant soon and will be ok with his prostate...my ex had prostate cancer and had surgery and did ok...it was his mind that went....anyhow...you get him well and then you get that plastic surgery to get yourself looking better ok? You do whats right for you!!!! You have come a  long way!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you and proud of you!!!

HUGS

Thanks Judy.  I remember those first few weeks in November 2006 when we were learning how these pouches work.  I discovered splenda and thought I had died and gone to heaven and then I put too much splenda in my tea and got so sick: I haven't touched splenda since. Hehe.  

Here's to the next year. 

Congratulations Jeannie on your 5th surgiversary! You have walked the walk... and I applaud you on your success. I love to see you post here. Balance is always a good thing in my mind. You are definitely a very intelligent woman. I hope that your loving husband can get his eyes "repaired" soon and that you have your plastics when you are ready. The weather should be lovely for your anniversary!
Julia

Thanks Julia.  

Over the last few days we have gone from freezing back up to the 80s, but anythng under 100 is fine for me.  My husband refers to himself as my blind date.  I tell him to stop.  His transplants are the cure for his disease, so we are waiting for the word that his right eye is good enough for the surgery.  They tell us that the eye banks always has a lot of corneas.  

thanks again.  

Congradulations on your wonderful successes in life. This journey has been difficult, but rewarding in many ways for you. Continued happiness in yourself and the life you now own.
Monica

thanks Monica. 

Jeanne,

Congratulations on your successes, there are many besides WLS and your input is valuable, as I've shared before, this is a very diverse group of people, who had we not met here, might never have associated with one another, we all have very different personalities and therefore there are times when there are things posted that I believe will cause an uproar, I mostly choose to overlook them, or deal with them in a manner that is private, but sometimes the people on this board will, just as in any interpersonal relationship, disagree and bicker, but the truth is there is more good than anything here and the support I've received has helped me immensely in my 4 years post-WLS, as well as before I had my surgery.  Could I do this without the board, probably to some degree, but why would I want to?   But again, that is where we all differ. 

Again, I applaud your many successes, am glad you survived all your complications and are living the life that at one time may have been only a dream. . .  Hope your husband gets his transplant soon.

Hugs, Laureen

Laureen, thank you so much.    It is the diversity that causes the contention.  As long as everyone agrees and closes their eyes to points of exclusion, then the sails are up and everyone is happy.  I do ignore an awful lot and have resisted commenting when I knew that what was being posted was wrong information or prejudicial, but sometimes, when the information is so incorrect that I have to say something or when it is something is insultive, I just cannot sit by and not say something.  

 My first year after surgery, this board gave me so much information, but the board at that time was a wls board.  We tended to talk about our personal lives and that was okay, but our personal sharings were usually on the lines of what we could do now that we couldn't do before.  I guess about two years ago, the board began to change as one by one the older gals checked out.  The ones who are gone or who only come by now and again have stayed in touch with me and say the same things that I say: they find the political, religous, and racists tone one of the largests reasons for leaving.  

Like I said, I come by to check my messages and to maintain contact with old friends. Since surgery, I have not had the same types of problems that some of the others have had.  When I was getting so sick, I was told not to post about my problems because the new people were being discouraged.  In fact, one person said to me to go to board that is for complications.  That was pretty much the end of my postings about my wls complications.  So, I found out that my complications weren't on topic enough but religion and politics and dating (no offense to those who date) and any other topic were topic enough.  I guess my complaint was then and is now that this board is not diverse:  those of us who are not conservative or christian are really supposed to sit quietly by.  

Anyway, thanks again for the congratulations 

I hope you did not misunderstand my post to you, because what I was saying is that I don't agree with some of what goes on here at times, however, my choice is to go behind the scenes in a PM to have my say, I often get annoyed at the political commentaries and as for the racist stuff, I think when it is in the form of a joke, I don't really pay it much mind and perhaps that is wrong, but then again I just don't think in terms of racism, even though I experienced being called things as a child because of my Italian heritage, as well as bore unkind comments about the size of my ears, my weight, etc., and I was raised not to be accepting of all kinds of people. Somewhere in life, hopefully, once we become of an age of reason, we make choices and mine was to accept people on their own value, not ethnicity, nor color, nor any other background, some would call me a pollyanna type, I see myself as a person who lives in reality, but with the hope for better in all things and that means I need to accept others right where they are, because the truth is I can change no one, only myself, which is not a cop out and does not mean I don't have opinions that differ and/or times when I feel the need to express them to others, it is just my desire not to hurt or humiliate others, as all my life that was something I so experienced, that make me choose to do things in my manner, you have every right to express your educated opinions and I, whilst sometimes, I know it is going to open a can of worms, I welcome your insights into things, it is through the expression of your intelligence that I often gain a new perspective and I truly thank you for that.

Also, one last thing, that you had complications and were told to go elsewhere is sad to me, because I think, no matter how new, the obvious is that there can be complications and that people should know about them.  I also believe in the idea that regain should be spoke about, which is why I am championing that one lately, because what I've found through the things I do, is that it is real and that this journey is a lifelong challenge and some of us need the encouragement and others of us just need to be aware.

I am glad you are healthy and living your life fully in a manner that, for you, prior to surgery was not possible. 

I count you among people I would consider a friend and hope one day to meet you.  Laureen