It's been two years (XP w/ PA forum)
Today marks the end of my time in FL, and also my two year surgiversary.
Two years ago, we vacationed here as well. I 'hit bottom' so to speak, not knowinig if my approval for surgery would go forward....and mostly in fear of not knowing what to do if I did NOT have surgery. At that time, if you had told me that my weight would "only" end up in the 150's, or that I'd end up wearing mostly single digit sizes...I'd have simply looked on in stunned disbelief. If you had told me I would ever enjoy the gym, I'd have shaken my head to say, "No, it's not possible."
For those who don't know me - I started at a high weight of 258 lbs, and was 245 on my surgery day. My lowest weight was 153; today I fluctuate from 155-159. I am 5'4 and 55 years old, so had my surgery at age 53.
Yesterday was a huge NSV for me. I have become friends with the woman who was my realtor here, and we met at a very nice mall to browse and have lunch with her 2 teenage girls. As we roamed around, it hit me. I was shopping with a friend. I can't recall EVER shopping with a friend. Shopping for clothing had to be a solitary pursuit - no one else wore plus sizes, and I didn't want anyone to know what size I really wore. But yesterday, I actually bought a pair of pants (on sale) and needed the SMALLER of the two pairs I tried on!
And then, I did something I haven't done in years. Some of you know that I write. But yesterday I wrote a poem that I hope captures some of this. The form may seem a little odd - it is called a Villanelle (19 lines with a set rhyme scheme).
So here you go - it doesn't have a title yet. (And you don't have to feel obligated to read it at all!)
Now is my time to be alive!
Lift my eyes, enjoy the view,
Not just to exist - but truly to thrive!
My spirit and my strength reborn, revived,
I do what I need and want to do.
Now is my time to be alive!
To live is more than to simply survive.
Explore this existence and all that is new,
Not just to exist, but truly to thrive!
Victory mine, no longer deprived!
Embrace the blessing of each day anew.
Now is my time to be alive!
Breathe deep with gratitude, focus and drive
And clear vision of where I am headed to,
Not just to exist, but truly to thrive!
Success as every day arrives,
Learn who I am - go deep and speak true.
Now is my time to be alive,
Not just to exist, but truly to thrive.
(c) 2011 L. McLean
Two years ago, we vacationed here as well. I 'hit bottom' so to speak, not knowinig if my approval for surgery would go forward....and mostly in fear of not knowing what to do if I did NOT have surgery. At that time, if you had told me that my weight would "only" end up in the 150's, or that I'd end up wearing mostly single digit sizes...I'd have simply looked on in stunned disbelief. If you had told me I would ever enjoy the gym, I'd have shaken my head to say, "No, it's not possible."
For those who don't know me - I started at a high weight of 258 lbs, and was 245 on my surgery day. My lowest weight was 153; today I fluctuate from 155-159. I am 5'4 and 55 years old, so had my surgery at age 53.
Yesterday was a huge NSV for me. I have become friends with the woman who was my realtor here, and we met at a very nice mall to browse and have lunch with her 2 teenage girls. As we roamed around, it hit me. I was shopping with a friend. I can't recall EVER shopping with a friend. Shopping for clothing had to be a solitary pursuit - no one else wore plus sizes, and I didn't want anyone to know what size I really wore. But yesterday, I actually bought a pair of pants (on sale) and needed the SMALLER of the two pairs I tried on!
And then, I did something I haven't done in years. Some of you know that I write. But yesterday I wrote a poem that I hope captures some of this. The form may seem a little odd - it is called a Villanelle (19 lines with a set rhyme scheme).
So here you go - it doesn't have a title yet. (And you don't have to feel obligated to read it at all!)
Now is my time to be alive!
Lift my eyes, enjoy the view,
Not just to exist - but truly to thrive!
My spirit and my strength reborn, revived,
I do what I need and want to do.
Now is my time to be alive!
To live is more than to simply survive.
Explore this existence and all that is new,
Not just to exist, but truly to thrive!
Victory mine, no longer deprived!
Embrace the blessing of each day anew.
Now is my time to be alive!
Breathe deep with gratitude, focus and drive
And clear vision of where I am headed to,
Not just to exist, but truly to thrive!
Success as every day arrives,
Learn who I am - go deep and speak true.
Now is my time to be alive,
Not just to exist, but truly to thrive.
(c) 2011 L. McLean
Congrats on your 2 year surgiversary, wishing you many more thriving moments... I am happy that I know you personally and hope to see you at Barix sometime soon. . .
Laureen
Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
Lynn,
Beautiful Poem!
Congrats on your new life and enjoying the exercise. You are Free!! Whhhooooooo!!
How fun for you to be shopping with your friends.
Continue down the path of wellness and keep spreading your wings...we are like butterfly's emerging from a cocoon...learning a new way of life. Hugs Debbie
Beautiful Poem!
Congrats on your new life and enjoying the exercise. You are Free!! Whhhooooooo!!
How fun for you to be shopping with your friends.
Continue down the path of wellness and keep spreading your wings...we are like butterfly's emerging from a cocoon...learning a new way of life. Hugs Debbie
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