Off topic- Mom situation

I don't want to clog up the thread with this but I need to take a minute from my day and process my sadness. It turns out that my Mom won't qualify for the Vetarans benefit that I thought she would get. My Dad (the veteran that we thought would qualify her) died in 1975 at the age of 51. My Mom remarried several times after that and her final husband was also a veteran I think (which would have worked) but I'm almost sure that they divorced before he died which cuts her off from the benefit. I'm just overwhelmed and sad... I want her to have a decent place to live but the options are not good. And I'm trying to work and handle it all. So I cry and work and cry. This process is hard. I pray that I die quickly.

Sorry things are going so badly with this. I have the same feeling ... I don't want to linger, either. Unfortunately, cancer runs in the family, ugh. Julia, feel free to vent.  If you need to talk, I'm here.

Thanks Eileen... I know you understand...

Julia, when we applied for benefits for my DH & I, we were told that if we divorced the benefits would stay in place. If I remarried I would lose them, & if I divorced a second time I could get them reinstated. I am not sure wo you are dealing with, but we had the help of a VA rep. This was 7 years ago so things may have changed. Please don't give up, some times the government makes you really fight for what you have worked for. Good luck.
Nan

I am sorry to read about your sadness Julia, wish I had words to make you feel ok, perhaps someone on here has some experience with this that they can point you in another direction.  Also, please know that in most any facility, when they see caring family members the care is usually better for those individuals. 

Sending you cyber hugs. . .

I am so sad to hear this! There are just not enough programs in place to care for those who need it. And worse, when you think you are covered and then find out you aren't! I hope something can be figured out for your Momma. My prayers are with you!

I am so sorry you are having to go through this.  Having ailing, elderly parents is so hard and sometimes the resources seem very scarce.

                            Hugs, Sharon

Hey that is why we are here to help carry each of us thru the good and bad. Oh I am sending hope, prayers of strength, and hugs of humor at this sad time. Which veterans officals have you spoken with? What options are open for her to qualify for nursing care facility or medicaid? love Monica

Dear Julia!

I am so very sorry to hear that you are having difficulties with these things and your dear Mom. Having recently been through much of what you are now going through, I can only feel such compassion..the stress and the worry that is on your shoulders.

I know things are much different here in Canada than it is where you are but I also had to fight and to get darned LOUD and demanding for assistance for my Mom. It isn't easy and it isn't fun but it worked for me!

*sending love, comfort, strength and courage*

Nancy B

I am so sorry you are dealing with such beauracracy.  Have you checked with a congressman's office?  My mom has gotten her boyfriend help with veteran's issues with the help of our senator. 

I will be praying for you and your Mom in the meantime.

Hugs,
Trish