Good Morning! It's Friday!
It is hard dealing with a husband with anger issues. Had that in my first marriage and finally left after 27 years. Made this very hard decision for a divorce and the road was very bumpy and scary for me but in the long run I'm glad I finally had the strength to leave. I survived, and God was walking by my side the whole time.
Stay strong my friend, you are sober and take each day at a time and yes sometimes it goes take each minute and struggle...I'm proud of you. Hopefully your hubby will get more help with his anger and PTSD. Sometimes staying in a long term marriage is hard. Right now it sounds like you have to be the rock! You are doing great. Hugs Debbie
Monica,
I am sorry to hear about your husband's anger issues. . . my 2nd husband was like that, though his anger was related to training for what he did, he was a professional kickboxer and like many athletes, the training works them up and they can't shut it off, more so in those who have underlying issues, as my ex was diagnosed as bipolar shortly after we married, he refused to take medication to deal with his diagnosis and after going back and forth for 7 years, I had no option but to get a divorce. I am simply letting you know that I understand how tough it is to live with anger, as I grew up with it too, my Mom was a ragealcoholic and her anger was something she needed to motivate her, so I've spent a good deal of my life trying not to be angry, because when I get angry, it is not pretty, it is why a drank and drugged for the years I lived that way, as it helped me suppress those emotions. For the most part, today, I am capable of handling myself differently, but it took years of being able to recognize what triggers it and learning to speak up when I had an issue and deal with it. I also have learned that oftentimes, anger is a result of either fear or not feeling in control of something. Anyway, just sharing a bit of myself here and how drinking helped me feel in control, which was an illusion.
Just try to remember that his anger has nothing to do with you and try to take Yoda for a walk or remove yourself from his presence when you start to see the signs.
Wishing you find peace within your storm. . .
Hugs, Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
Hubby went off to the Tampa VA, almost 60 miles away. I am here with Yoda. I called the home VA medical center to complain with the director. The patient rep, a friend of mine and co-worker for years called this am letting us know the new VA doctor hubby has will not renew the vicodin script without blood work and stuff. He has been on this medication for 20 years and does not abuse it at all. His artifical hip has been bothering him alot and therefore his back is out of whack. He is so mad that he is being treated like this. When he is mad he is mad at everyone around him. He has severe prolonged PTSD and has been in treatment for this for 20 years. He has made great strides, but it is easy to fall back into combat mode.
I will not drink, I can't afford to NOT be in control of me. Told one daughter about problem, but don't want to burden the other 2.
You all know how I OCD. I am trying hard not to be off the wall. I have Yoda to care for. Hubby will be gone for hours since it will be sit and wait to be seen.
I have the traveling bra on.......again thanks for your support and prayers.
Monica
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Glad you have Yoda, he will give you love and support in his own way. I know when I'm feel scared or low or depressed, there's Juliette for me. People who don't have pets don't understand that, but she does wonders for me. And we are here for you too.
If you ever need to talk and unburden yourself, I'm here (well, I wasn't all afternoon today, but I'm usually here during the day).
I get to babysit my new granddaughter Holly tomorrow, what a cuddler she is!
The snirt is almost gone, I just wore a sweater into work.
We are starting a weight loss challenge in our hospital for our Wellness program and I have 10 people on my team. Hopefully I can get them to walk during their lunch breaks and think up a cool name for our team. I'm excited about this. Hugs Debbie
Debbie, it would be interesting and fun to watch the sugaring process. You'll have to let us know what it's like!
Laureen, so happy your roommate situation is peaceful once again. No one needs that in their lives.
Monica, as always, so proud of your strength. Hang in there Honey!!
I'm off to the doctor's office on the way to work today. I'm going back to wearing a binder for a couple of weeks to help with this awful swelling I have in the afternoons. Good news, the arm is sooooo much better, down to band-aids now, so my sleeves aren't so bulky. Yipee!! He's going to do a bit of revising of the TT as I have a little "dog ear" on the right side. Just a quick office procedure and it will be done.
Off I go. Sure hope everyone has a peaceful and happy Friday!
Susan
