It's Thursday - already. What are you up to?
Congrats on your children's success. Prayers for that little girl and Officer Smith's family.
Monica, yay on being sober.
I pressed the doc for more info about how long I have so I could know how quickly I need to schedule things. I said, "Two years?" He said the average is 6 to 12 months. He will know better when we see how the chemo is working at the end of Jan. So again, I will adjust my time schedule for getting things done. Husband is in denial. He thinks I can get longer. He doesn't want to think it could be shorter. He likes to be in control, but there is no controlling cancer. I have not been feeling right since April and getting doctors to test me took so long, so I've lost time there. Treatment didn't start until the beginning of December. I have to do what I want since it's my disease and my life. It just makes me tense knowing hubby is not facing it. He thinks I'm making the worst of it. I say I'm just facing reality. I'm not giving up, I have hope and faith, I just can't waste time thinking it's not going to happen.
Thanks for letting me go on about this.
I lost 2 lbs. this week. The dietician came by during chemo and told me not to lose any more. That's the first time in my life anyone has told me that! LOL.
Well, I've run my mouth long enough. Going to take a nap.
Happy New Year and hugs and prayers for all,
Bev
You have such courage and I wish you well. . . none of us know if we will be here tomorrow, as tomorrow is not guaranteed, but hoped for, so hope and believe and I will pray for your continued strength and peace amidst this life crisis your are experiencing.
Much love, Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
You are so right. We are even changing our wills just in case hubby goes before me for some reason. He'll leave everything to my son. Then my son can take care of me if need be.
Who knows, I could get killed in a car accident or something before then.
Thanks for all the support. I tell all of you my cyber friends because some of this really upsets my family and it's hard to tell them.
I'm not telling my Mom who is 82. We told her about maybe two years and she didn't sleep for a couple of nights. She is a real worrier and it could affect her health. So it's better she doesn't know the timetable has moved up. We haven't told our son either yet. I think we'll wait until the end of Jan. test results.
Love,
Bev
People always say they don't know what they should say in times like this. But as me on the receiving end, I have to tell you what you say doesn't matter, it's the fact that you took the time to say something to me means a whole lot to me. Knowing I am in your prayers is also a comfort.
Thanks and hugs,
Bev
Bev, you inspire me so much...you show such courage and tenacity. I am also a cancer survivor, twenty years at this point.
At the time, the hospital staff felt that I neded counselling because I dared to laugh in the face of cancer...making small jokes like " at last! Im finally going to get the body size I've always wanted- even if it's for just a few months"...chemo: "I have it all arranged..just the GREY stuff will fall out!"
I say: CHEERS FOR YOU!! You have *****! and I admire that! *hugs* I just lost a cousin this week to cancer..when he was told he only had several weeks, he said "SH** Happens!" and proceeded to spend the last few weeks laughing, telling stories and sharing his life and dreams with family. So my words can only encourage you to continue to make wonderful memories for your family and to live each day to the fullest as best as you can.
You are surrounded by angels, both in physical and spirit form, to bring comfort and strength.
Nancy B
You are living what most of us survivors worry about...and you are living it with grace and courage. When I thought that my cancer had spread I didn't take it so well...but I hope that if it ever really does happen that I can handle it with grace...I'm sure you still have your moments. Thank you for your honesty too. I hope that we can be friends as you walk this path.
Julia
I think it happens in stages - anger, grief, acceptance, determination. What I am determined to do is make sure that as many people I know, who have survived cancer once, be their own advocate and demand retests every few years - CT scans, CA-125 Blood Tests, PET scans, etc. I "fell through the cracks" of the medical system. If this had been caught four years ago, I would not be terminal.
I'm also determined to pack as much loving and living into the time I have left. I choose not to spend that time on regrets, revenge or anger. They do sneak into my head every once in a while but I quickly send them on their way, they are no help to me. Instead I want to thank the people have added to my life and spend the rest of the time loving my family and friends.
So thank you my friend. And spread the word to anyone you know who is at risk for recurrent cancer.
Bev
