Sending up the white flag, throwing in the towel. It's time to ask for help

Oh Mary, thanks, you're very sweet.

I guess in a way, my posting about this struggle might help someone, so yes, I suppose I do have something to contribute.

Hope you have a great new year. Thanks for thinking of me!

Hi Susan,

I began my new year's resolution last November (why wait?) I decided after many years gone to return to OA (Overeaters Anonymous). I'm a compulsive overeater, even if I'm thin and don't overeat today. Doctors have successfully operated on my stomach (RNY 2007), Hip replacement (2008), and even 2 surgeries to get rid of excessive skin. But NO doctor has operated on my BRAIN, my main problem all along.

I love OA and the spiritual aspect, thus I returned. When I attended my local bariatric support group meeting in November I wanted to scream, because the meeting was devoted to sharing recipes for the holidays. For me, food is NOT the answer. I find solace in the 12 steps today and am making this part of my recovery plan.

Much love to you on your journey to finding the peace you desire. You're not only accepted, but loved.

Kathie, my husband did OA for quite some time and was very successful with it. I didn't feel that I should encroach on that, so I never went to a meeting with him, even though he invited me to go.

I'll certainly think about it.

Thanks

Oh Susan,

I'm sorry you feel that your post would be "insignificant", funny thing though I usually feel that way too, but I push past it often enough, but just this past week, I have not been online as often and there are also the days when I don't have time to post, so I try to poke my head in, read a bit, but then I too am "struggling" with a weight gain and while I am only 27 months post-op, for me it's about the choices I've been making, the holiday's were just overwhelming to me this year and I don't mean at home, it was all the food in the office and while I always bring my own food and snacks I found myself eating the stuff I should not be and with little consequence, though I do not mean LITTLE, I just mean no dumping or that, because the consequence showed a 5 lbs. gain and that is something I just can't abide for many of the same reasons you voiced. . .  so even though I did not want to, I went to my support group on Saturday and when I got there I ratted myself out and it helped to know that I was not alone and the exercise we had was about it being a new year and setting new goals, one of which I met this morning when I got up and could not find one good reason not to get my lazy butt in the gym, something that went bye bye because I did not want to take time away from Dillinger, well Dillinger has been gone for over a month, but my butt had not been to the gym but one time.  I made it there and I am going to be eating on plan and if I falter, I will start over and over, as many times as I must start over, I will do so, but I know that this must be done according to the rules and so I am logging my food again and doing what worked for 2 years. 

I have no clue why you would be gaining weight if you are doing all the right things, perhaps you need to shake things up in some fashion, adding a different routine in or foods. 

As for people not missing you, you are missed, but when people go missing on here, oftentimes, it is an indication that they are busy, however, I think we should form a posse and round up those of us that are not posting for a week a longer, just as a sort of check see what one another is up to. . .  sometimes, I have felt as you do though too.

Anyway, I hope you feel better and get some resolution with what is going on and I hope to see you later this year. . .

Hugs, Laureen

golly Laureen, I would SO like to see you again! I could use a Sistah hug  

I have succumbed to the temptation of holiday goodies, but you know how I am, I still logged it on fitday...lol!  So, I rat myself out to myself!  This will all work out, I'll find a way to make it happen!

Thanks so much for always being here. It's all about love and support, right?

Laureen

I'd love to be part of the "posse".  It would be a great improvement on the winter "blahs", and crawling back into bed and pulling the covers over my head every day....

Candy

Then let's do it, if we don't see one of our posters online for a week at a time, let's do a shout out for them, though what that means is we kind of have to be around to see who is posting regularly. . .  I think it helps to know that, especially, as many of us seem to have the same damn issues, you know, "the well I haven't been posting and no one notices kind of thing", though sometimes we just simply get too busy and I know that routine well enough, however, I usually manage a quick looksee once a day or at the least every other. . .  it's about caring and staying on track and let's face it no one quite gets it like we do. . . 

So consider yourself deputized (lol) and whoever wants to join in let's do it, perhaps even do a weekly roll call where everyone just kind of posts, even if it's just one line to let us know they are around. . .  call it the weekly round up. . .  pick a day and we'll start it up. . .

I'm soooo jealous that you are going on a cruise soon. . .  enjoy!

Susan:

I too am in the same boat as you are ... so we can help each other row. I have now gained 20 pounds ... I can say some of it is fluid retention in my legs but certainly not all of it. I know a lot of my eating lately has been emotional eating ... and certainly I have been through my share of downs (I won't say ups because there haven't been any this past year). I sure hope the antidepressants help with that, although I know they have a side effect of weight gain, I will happily take that if it helps with my mood.

And my other thing has been exercise, or lack of it. I had hoped by getting the knee replaced, I'd be able to walk more ... well, that hasn't worked out. I can't swim because I can't afford the Y fees, at least not until I'm out of bankruptcy and getting more in my paycheck again (which should be soon). Even then, it will still be tight. So I don't exercise other than to walk around Meijer once a week for groceries (and Meijer is one big store, let me tell you). I don't eat right ... I eat late at night when I get home because I'm hungry (and bored). I try not to eat at work, but someone is always bringing in something. I am trying to get back into the habit of not buying all the sugar stuff. I never have liked writing down everything ... it was my downfall in Weigh****chers and every other diet I was ever on. I do drink my water religiously, and take my vitamins ... I was very good at that always. My problem has been exercise because the only thing I ever enjoyed was swimming. It freed ... it made me feel good ... it relaxed my body and opened my mind.

Don't ever feel so bad about yourself that you can't post here. If I didn't have this forum, I would be certifiably insane. I would never have survived these past few years.

We are all in this together, even if no one responds.

Isn't it funny that there are now so many responses to my post....so many rowing the same boat with me. Almost makes me feel good about it....NOT!  LOL

When I get too busy at work to eat I panic and try to catch up with the calories in the evening. So, there might be the answer. You can't call it grazing because it's the food that I should have eaten during the day, just at a different time, all planned, just rescheduled.  Hmmmm.

 Susan,
You have been missed. I have been running around like a maniac and haven't had a chance to return your calls. I'm sorry.

We have talked about a slight weight gain and both know it is frightening. 10 lbs feels like a ton.

When the doctor put me on the new med my appetite went haywire. I had to go back to several tiny feedings each day. Hunger wasn't a problem but I'd get all shaky without a small bit of food.

Son of a gun, I am dropping weight again. Maybe you should shoot for more frequent meals? If you are going too long without food, does your body decide it is starving and hang on to calories? That's just a total guess on my part.

I KNOW you are not going to be anything but a successful statistic. No big girl panties for you. 

Many hugs and kisses
Annette