OT - Mother's 90th Birthday-Afternoon Tea Party!
Hello, everyone! This is OFF TOPIC and far TOO LONG!
Goodness, I thought that everyone would have been sick and tired of all my rambling plans for Mom's surprise party but I've been asked to post details so here they are:
I'd called Friday to check in on her and she told me that she was dressed and waiting for "someone to pick me up and take me back to my old place for a family photo"...lol..poor Mom..got her days mixed up again.
Anyway, I assured her that I'd call and remind her that morning so she got back into what she calls her COMFY clothes and was content but confused.
On Sunday morning, I called her to remind her but she was already dressed and ready. I got to the location of the party and started the two young ladies (I mentor them and had hired to help me) working at setting up the tables and such and then called Mom again to say that JB and Derek were coming to get her.
When Mother finally arrived, dressed in her long black skirt (to her ankles because she hates struggling into pantyhose...lol) & a black lace top that has purple and a bit of white flowers woven thru the black lace. Her snow white hair was freshly permed and I'd had them give her a pedicure the week before.
I rolled her in her wheelchair into the huge fabulously-decorated lobby (my rental dollars at work) and set her in front of the Christmas tree and had Anne, the photographer, take photos..the entrance to the activity/party room was not in Mom's view where the girls had been working at setting up so it was still a secret.
Danny and Amy arrived...more photos..and in between photos, I sat with Mom and we talked about the new place and about the Christmas decor where we sat...in behind Mom, JB, Derek and Danny were slipping by, unbeknownst to her, with boxes and baskets filled with party supplies. More photos and then, as my niece and her two boys and hubby arrived, I revealed the secret..Mom had had NO idea!
She was startled but I wheeled her into the big activity room which was all decorated with purple (her favourite colour) balloons, ribbons and flowers. I put a beautiful wrist corsage on her made of white rosebuds and purple little flowers and purple ribbon...looked lovely with her outfit.
People started arriving and she knew nost of them including her sister-in-law from Sudbury, about 7-8 hours drive away (Mom hadnt seen her for 15 years) and three of Aunt Doris's four offspring (the fourth had come to see Mom several weeks before since they couldn't get here for the party), more cousins and more family from all over the province! We had forty invited guests plus a number of her friends from the old residence that she just moved from to the assisted living facility. So I'd say there were about 65-70 people there all told. Lots of hugs and kisses and laughter!!
The Dutch European Whipped Cream Cake was gorgeous..covered on top with fresh fruit..it measured about 3 feet long by 18 inched wide and 6 inches high! (I had one paper-thin slice, just to try it and Rufus seemed quite satisfed with that....besides, I had NO time to eat). Beside the cake, stood a shadow box with Mom's picture and wooden letters that spell out her name and 90 yrs old in pink with pink & purple skinny ribbons! This shadow box will fit into the small glass-fronted cabinet, in the hallway at the door of her new room.
I had baked brownies, buttertart squares, maccaroon squares, Nanaimo bars, and shortbread. I'd also bought some specialty imported chocolate biscuits and rolled "lace" cookies, Empire cookies and Litzen cookies from the bakery. The huge fruit platter came with fruit dip (okay, I dipped once and it was far too sweet for my liking!...who'da thunk it!?)
I had Christmas-wrapped boxes (about 8 inches square) scattered about the six tables, groaning with goodies, and filled with Hersheys chocolate nuggets, (some plain, some with bits of toffee and almonds) all wrapped in silver or gold foil..looked so festive! The tables were covered with my white, hunter green or red linen tablecloths and each had squat-looking scented candles lit and seated on mirror tiles.
We had fresh coffee, tea and a crock pot filled with hot apple cider as well as a huge cooler filled with crushed ice, two kinds of pop (soda) and water bottles.
At one end of the room, the trio, "Celtic Fiddle" (with electric fiddles and guitar and bass guitar) played Irish music for two hours..they wore red & green plaid ties and hats and sang wonderfully..even Happy Birthday to Mom and everyone sang along, much to Mother's delight (she had never had a surprise party before).
Other tables were set with comfy chairs and decor for guests to sit at (tho Dan & Derek wanted to sit at the CAKE table) and Mom sat like a Queen with her Court in the middle. I passed around a guest book and everyone signed and left comments and photos were constantly being taken all thru the party.
I had to stand up front and read all the emails and letters to Mom from those who couldn't get there and I'd printed them on pretty stationery to put into the special photo album I am making her with all her photos, letters and birthday cards and dried roses from her bouquets. She even got a beautiful bouquet of flowers, balloons and chocolates from my half-aunt and uncle & cousin in Argentina!
She had a stack of birthday cards like I've never seen...lol..and tho the invitations said "Best Wishes Only!", some brought her flowers or candy or both and she also got several bouquets of roses! Another guest made a donation in Mom's name to a camp for needy children! Now we are busy preparing "Thank You" cards *s*...that will keep Mom busy for a while.
The music was enjoyed by all and some relatives were even up dancing Irish jigs! That's my family! *s* There was alot of "catching up".
As each guest left, they were given a bag of my home-made chocolate bark (three different kinds- 1: white and milk choc w/ slivered almonds and dried cranberries, 2: white choc w/ walnut pices and dark choc drizzled on top, and 3: white & milk choc mixed with crushed Oreo cookies) and attached with ribbon to each bag was a laminated bookmark.
On the bookmark was a photo of Mom at 19yrs old, a real beauty!, wearing a pale pink dress she had made herself, so I used the same pink to do some of the lettering and accents and, on the bookmark, thanked the guests for making Mom's special day even more special with their presence as well as having Mom's NEW address and phone number so now all the relatives can contact Mom anytime and can keep the bookmark as a memento.
I had photos taken of Mom with all her grands and great grands and then with each family which I will forward to them later. I will try and figure out how to post photos..I haven't gotten them yet from the photographer.
By the end, Mom was exhausted as I expected..goodbyes were done then Derek and I took Mom back to her new home (a 35 minute drive in the rain) and JB led a caravan of cars to a nearby popular restaurant for supper before the out-of-towners had to start driving home, our treat...it was the least we could do since they came from so far away for my Mother..
Mom need alot of help getting settled but she was too tired to eat supper so I got her undressed and into bed and arranged for the staff to bring her some soup and sandwich later after she had rested a bit. Then Derek and I met the others at the restaurant and had a few hours of chat.I was also worn out but I was so happy that all went well. My legs ached something fierce but after two days, I felt human again.
But the BEST THING of it all was how Mom perked up SO much from then on! This past week, she is no longer depressed, confused and staring at the floor..she smiles and jokes with me and dressed nicely...no longer sitting on her bed all day but uses her wheelchair to "walk" herself in the halls, visit the SunRoom that has huge cages of birds and tropical plants, she is participating in word games and discussions, eating well and we have discussed outings she would enjoy! Yesterday I called her room but she wasnt there..she was out playing BINGO!! *s*
She proudly shows off her flowers, birthday cards and treats to the staff and shows an interest now in what she wears again. I have my MOM back! *s*
Nancy B
The party sounds lovely and your last paragraph says it all, it was just what she needed to bring her a sense of belonging to life! You are an amazing woman with an abundance of love and I can only imagine that your Mother feels that and I am happy for both of you!
Hugs, Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
What a wonderful day for you and your mother and what a wonderful outcome for all of your hard work!
My mother, who would have been 99 last August, died 26 years ago, and I have missed her every single day since then. There has been so much that I have missed of her life since she died so young. Your relationship with your mother has allowed me to live vicariously in a way that I can't really explain.
Thank you for sharing. Margaret
SW: 240
CW: 173.8
GW: 150
The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated.
Mohandas Gandhi
Wow when you throw a party...you really go the extra mile...it sounded like a real hit with everyone.....especially your wonderful mother!!!
I hope to see a few pics soon!
You are a fabulous daughter....your mother is blessed!
Your last paragraph says it all....it was worth every moment you put into that celebration!!
Hugs.....connie d
So glad everything went so well for you.
Happy that she has perked up again. Hopefully she'll get more involved with the people at her new home.
Jan
What I like the most is to hear how your Mother perked up afterwards. So glad she is taking an interest in her surroundings and taking care of herself again. You should be very proud of what you have done for her.
Thanks so much for making us a part of her party.
Millie
PS Your Mother must be a grand woman for you and others to love her like you do.
