My mom passed away today
Jean, I am so glad to see you post again but not with these cir****tances.
Please know that my heart goes to you at this time. I know the pain that you are feeling and it is a pain like no other. No matter what your age your Mom is still Mommy to you. I know that when I lost mine 6 years ago one of the first things out of my mouth to Bill was that I was an orphan now. Sometimes I still feel like that but we know that our parents are always close to us and is there watching us with pride and love.
Know that you are in my prayers at this difficult time. Please feel free to come to us because you are a part of our family here.
Sending you love and warm and caring hugs....
Please know that my heart goes to you at this time. I know the pain that you are feeling and it is a pain like no other. No matter what your age your Mom is still Mommy to you. I know that when I lost mine 6 years ago one of the first things out of my mouth to Bill was that I was an orphan now. Sometimes I still feel like that but we know that our parents are always close to us and is there watching us with pride and love.
Know that you are in my prayers at this difficult time. Please feel free to come to us because you are a part of our family here.
Sending you love and warm and caring hugs....
It's not what you gather, but what you scatter
that tells what kind of life you have lived.
Sorry for your loss Jean. I know that time is coming soon for me and it can be such a bitter sweet time.
Did you have written instructions to the home about call the NY place? if so, then they are the ones that owe....not you. Have the wrong place send the bill to the home....
Again, so sorry for you loss.
Did you have written instructions to the home about call the NY place? if so, then they are the ones that owe....not you. Have the wrong place send the bill to the home....
Again, so sorry for you loss.
Women are angels.
...and when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick.
We are flexible.
Darlene
...and when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick.
We are flexible.
Darlene
Jean:
I'm so sorry for your loss. I've lost two friends and an aunt this year, and I know how tough this can be.
As for the nursing home, I wouldn't let them off the hook. If you had written instructions, I'd send them the bill for the embalming.
I had to chuckle about your mom's preferring a piece of chocolate over a whole pumpkin pie ... my sentiments exactly! A woman after my own heart!
I'm so sorry for your loss. I've lost two friends and an aunt this year, and I know how tough this can be.
As for the nursing home, I wouldn't let them off the hook. If you had written instructions, I'd send them the bill for the embalming.
I had to chuckle about your mom's preferring a piece of chocolate over a whole pumpkin pie ... my sentiments exactly! A woman after my own heart!
Jean...I am so sorry for your loss of your Mom. It doesn't matter how old they are or how old you are....the hurt is just the same. You had her for very many years so reflect on that. Although her mind was deteriorating, I am sure she loved you as her "little girl". I lost my Mom at the age of 88 and I was was 60 and it hurt like crazy. She is in a better place now and without confusion or pain. Please remember the good times and the wonderful memories. My heart goes out to you. I have missed you, dear Jean and wondered how you were and what had happened to you.
Love and Hugs,
Sandy
Love and Hugs,
Sandy
So sorry for your loss, Jean. I asked my Mom, who is now 91, hold old you are when you stop needing your Mother & you know what she said? She said "I don't know" and got some tears in her eyes thinking how she still misses her own Mother. It's so sad for you & I'm sending hugs & prayers your way.
Jan
Jan
Dear Jean.....your Mama is in such a better place now...peaceful and happy....not struggling to remember things and people...so frightened inside.
I thought when my Mama died I would just miss so much talking to her about everyone I loved that she loved also....surprise surprise....I still talk to her....but she only answers in my head and that is good, because she was beginning to have such memory problems she couldn't keep people straight....esp the nurses and CNA's...and it really was a strain for her keeping up.
I know she is so much happier now, I was sitting next to her when she left and she looked like a sleeping baby. She was amazing, she still didn't have wrinkles at 93. Her breaths just got further apart and finally just stopped. She just could not keep weight on....even though she ate two big meals a day....her diagnosis was "Failure to Thrive"....I personally had never heard of it.
I think it is quite wrong of the nursing home to ignore the families wishes. I think perhaps a written letter to them with the letterhead of an attorney should help you save that money. They might have a deal with the local funeral home.
Take care of yourself, you know your Mama would want that.
Love, Marti
I thought when my Mama died I would just miss so much talking to her about everyone I loved that she loved also....surprise surprise....I still talk to her....but she only answers in my head and that is good, because she was beginning to have such memory problems she couldn't keep people straight....esp the nurses and CNA's...and it really was a strain for her keeping up.
I know she is so much happier now, I was sitting next to her when she left and she looked like a sleeping baby. She was amazing, she still didn't have wrinkles at 93. Her breaths just got further apart and finally just stopped. She just could not keep weight on....even though she ate two big meals a day....her diagnosis was "Failure to Thrive"....I personally had never heard of it.
I think it is quite wrong of the nursing home to ignore the families wishes. I think perhaps a written letter to them with the letterhead of an attorney should help you save that money. They might have a deal with the local funeral home.
Take care of yourself, you know your Mama would want that.
Love, Marti
"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone is fighting some kind of battle"
Dear Jean-
I don't think any of us is ready to lose our mums. Mine died 18 months ago and I still miss her terribly. So many folks will say that she had a full life, that you should be glad she's at peace now and that any woman in her middle years is lucky to have had a mum that many years. However, the truth is that we never stop wanting our mum to be around forever, we'll always be that little 6 year old needing her mummy.
Blessings and prayers are winging your way.
Rusty
I don't think any of us is ready to lose our mums. Mine died 18 months ago and I still miss her terribly. So many folks will say that she had a full life, that you should be glad she's at peace now and that any woman in her middle years is lucky to have had a mum that many years. However, the truth is that we never stop wanting our mum to be around forever, we'll always be that little 6 year old needing her mummy.
Blessings and prayers are winging your way.
Rusty
Jean
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my mom last year this time. I still feel her with me and miss her every day.
Now - like Jackie I too am a bit upset with the final arrangements. You should be able to go to the funeral home that had the arrangements made previous and get a refund on your mom's investment. You should also contact the NY funeral association and Nursing Home regulation and report this if anything else to prevent another family going through this same thing. I am without words on this - Were her intentions written down? Were they kept in her file? Did you have a copy of the intentions or the funeral homes agreement? All these are documents in your case against the Nursing Home.
I am sorry you have to deal with this at a time when you deserve to deal with nothing more than fond memories of your mom. Take small steps daily to make sure your voice is heard in this.
You were so blessed to have a good day with your mom before she passed. Good in that you got a hug - shared a cookie and shared your love. We are never ready to let our loved ones go. They may be done with their work here but we are never done with them in our lives.
After my husband passed away (7 years ago) - I was left with my 2 young boys age 11 (twins). I told them life is short - eat dessert first Friday. And every Friday we would go to the store and buy icecream or a cookie and think of Dad. One day they told the clerk our motto - she was stunned but then smiled and said - yes - that's right.
So - you shared your story about your cookie I was reminded of our family motto - Life is short - eat dessert first
Mary - Vashon
Blessings and prayers to you and your family.
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my mom last year this time. I still feel her with me and miss her every day.
Now - like Jackie I too am a bit upset with the final arrangements. You should be able to go to the funeral home that had the arrangements made previous and get a refund on your mom's investment. You should also contact the NY funeral association and Nursing Home regulation and report this if anything else to prevent another family going through this same thing. I am without words on this - Were her intentions written down? Were they kept in her file? Did you have a copy of the intentions or the funeral homes agreement? All these are documents in your case against the Nursing Home.
I am sorry you have to deal with this at a time when you deserve to deal with nothing more than fond memories of your mom. Take small steps daily to make sure your voice is heard in this.
You were so blessed to have a good day with your mom before she passed. Good in that you got a hug - shared a cookie and shared your love. We are never ready to let our loved ones go. They may be done with their work here but we are never done with them in our lives.
After my husband passed away (7 years ago) - I was left with my 2 young boys age 11 (twins). I told them life is short - eat dessert first Friday. And every Friday we would go to the store and buy icecream or a cookie and think of Dad. One day they told the clerk our motto - she was stunned but then smiled and said - yes - that's right.
So - you shared your story about your cookie I was reminded of our family motto - Life is short - eat dessert first
Mary - Vashon
Blessings and prayers to you and your family.
Think of where you've been ~ Dream of where you are going
Share your goals with others and pay it forward.
Share your goals with others and pay it forward.
so sorry to hear of your loss. I understand lsot my mom 2 yrs ago she had alzheimer's so dad, terrible disease. I was with her when she passed.
friends ave told me it gets easier w time but so far it is still very hard.
I miss her so much.
my thoughts and prayers are with you and yours
friends ave told me it gets easier w time but so far it is still very hard.
I miss her so much.
my thoughts and prayers are with you and yours
pre op diet wt 293
Sending hugs and prayers to you.
I too lost my mom many years ago Dec 19 and I also still talk to her in my head. She will always be your mom.
I also woudn't let the nursing home off the hook - they are the ones who didn't do as they sould and they are the ones who should have to pay, not you.
Hugs again.
Sheri
I too lost my mom many years ago Dec 19 and I also still talk to her in my head. She will always be your mom.
I also woudn't let the nursing home off the hook - they are the ones who didn't do as they sould and they are the ones who should have to pay, not you.
Hugs again.
Sheri
RNY 
Nov 5, 2008
16 pounds lost pre surgery
Nov 5, 200816 pounds lost pre surgery
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