Monday! Monday! What's Happening with YOU?
Oh my gosh Connie, that's exactly how I have felt most of my life. Like you're not really a part of things even when you're smack in the middle of some activity or group of people. It's a terrible feeling. I don't think one can explain to other people what it feels like. I was surprised to see you express the feeling. I always attributed it to lonliness, but lonliness that's very deep, probably with lots of other things connected to it. I'm sorry to hear there are other people who feel this way. Maybe our OFF friend Maui Karen would comment on it.
Barbara D.
Connie:
I often feel I'm alone ... that's why I come here, so I feel less lonely. Or why I call people so often. I have so few people who live close to me that I can depend on as close friends ... and there are days I just feel so alone and so worthless, and especially lately. So, yeah, I understand your struggles completely.
Please don't feel you're ever completely alone. If you need to talk, I'm home all day most of the time, and I'm there for you. If I can't be in Minnesota, well, I'm just a phone away.
I often feel I'm alone ... that's why I come here, so I feel less lonely. Or why I call people so often. I have so few people who live close to me that I can depend on as close friends ... and there are days I just feel so alone and so worthless, and especially lately. So, yeah, I understand your struggles completely.
Please don't feel you're ever completely alone. If you need to talk, I'm home all day most of the time, and I'm there for you. If I can't be in Minnesota, well, I'm just a phone away.
Every thing you do for your mom is great. You won't have regrets. I was happy I helped my mom and when she died, I knew I had done my best. We were able to become closer through her final illness and last days. I feel fortunate I had that time!
Back at work today and it's hard to be here. The weather in Minnesota has been really mild and beautiful lately. A reprieve from the cold October we had. Maybe it will shorten Winter a bit. The weekend was busy with Michael's art fair on Saturday (he did all right, not great). Sunday we did a cooking day and made ground turkey chili, ground turkey meatballs, and chicken curry stew - we are set for the week! I'll have a couple of meatballs with marinara or a half cup of the chili or chicken stew to take to lunches. Mmmmm - and healthy!
I have a sore on the back of my left leg that has plagued me too long, so I'm going to the doctor later today. Work is OK, not a big fan of Mondays here - but we have Wednesday off for Veteran't Day, so that helps!
Hope everyone has a good week.
Back at work today and it's hard to be here. The weather in Minnesota has been really mild and beautiful lately. A reprieve from the cold October we had. Maybe it will shorten Winter a bit. The weekend was busy with Michael's art fair on Saturday (he did all right, not great). Sunday we did a cooking day and made ground turkey chili, ground turkey meatballs, and chicken curry stew - we are set for the week! I'll have a couple of meatballs with marinara or a half cup of the chili or chicken stew to take to lunches. Mmmmm - and healthy!
I have a sore on the back of my left leg that has plagued me too long, so I'm going to the doctor later today. Work is OK, not a big fan of Mondays here - but we have Wednesday off for Veteran't Day, so that helps!
Hope everyone has a good week.
Mary
"Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you CAN do." John Wooden
I'm down 120 pounds - thanks to RNY! Working on the next 25. Then I'll tackle more...
"Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you CAN do." John Wooden
I'm down 120 pounds - thanks to RNY! Working on the next 25. Then I'll tackle more...
Hi Nancy and my OFF family:
A quick post to say I made it to my brother's ... learned how to feed his cat (she meowed at us incessantly ... she's hyperthyroid, so there's special instructions ... then she didn't even eat). Anyway, I'm here, safe and sound. Traffic and construction issues weren't bad, but I'm tired, my knee and back hurt, so what else is new?
Gary's surgery is at 9 a.m. tomorrow; he'll be in ICU post-op because of where they're doing the surgery (in his neck) might cause breathing issues. He might be home Wednesday, though.
I'll read more later. The computer is in my bedroom. But right now, I think I'll sign off in case we want to go out to dinner (hope so, because I haven't eaten since I stopped at Cracker Barrel in Stevensville, MI, this morning, on the way down).
Nancy, the situation with your mom sounds complicated ... I think my oldest brother is handling everything with my mom ... she trusts him (doesn't trust me, obviously, I'm the screwup).
Well, have a nice night.
A quick post to say I made it to my brother's ... learned how to feed his cat (she meowed at us incessantly ... she's hyperthyroid, so there's special instructions ... then she didn't even eat). Anyway, I'm here, safe and sound. Traffic and construction issues weren't bad, but I'm tired, my knee and back hurt, so what else is new?
Gary's surgery is at 9 a.m. tomorrow; he'll be in ICU post-op because of where they're doing the surgery (in his neck) might cause breathing issues. He might be home Wednesday, though.
I'll read more later. The computer is in my bedroom. But right now, I think I'll sign off in case we want to go out to dinner (hope so, because I haven't eaten since I stopped at Cracker Barrel in Stevensville, MI, this morning, on the way down).
Nancy, the situation with your mom sounds complicated ... I think my oldest brother is handling everything with my mom ... she trusts him (doesn't trust me, obviously, I'm the screwup).
Well, have a nice night.
Aloha Nancy and all my OFF family......
I just had a chance to read your post nancy this morning before zipping out for a meeting. I get tired thinking about all you do, and inspired at the same time. Taking care of mother who is fading has to be one of the hardest acts of love ever done by a child to a parent. We like to think of them as healthy, wise, strong, champions of our lives, etc. I was very lucky with my parents (if you can say their dying was lucky). My father was an alcoholic with 13 years in AA, and he died at an AA meeting. His funeral included about 300 people many of whom stood up and praised my dad for helping them and keeping them alive. Made me very proud of him.
My mother was a religious believer in prayer and NOT doctors so she ended up in a sanitarium with a bowel obstruction that the medical personell could easily have broken up and saved her...but she preferred to pray about it as was her way. She never got help and died about 4 hours before I arrived from Maui so I did not get a chance to say good bye to her or to forgive her for perceived harm she had inflicted on me growing up. I know now that she did the best SHE knew how and was parroting the teachings of my grandmother before her. I rebelled and denied her religion when very young and that caused great family friction for a long while.
So many of you are dealing with parents at the ends of their lifetimes and I really feel for you. In addition you are also dealing with challenges with your own bodies and lives and your own families. I feel such pride in all of you for doing your best and sharing here with us. One day I will open up and give you "the rest of the story"in my case....not quite ready yet.
Happily I'm back to baby testing three mornings a week, and start at 5:30 when it's still dark outside. My average babies lately is 7 per day, with 9 the other day but two who were on monitors or in an incubator. I always have a surprise waiting for me when I enter the hospital at 5:30 in the morning.........how many babies waiting for me???
My weight is a mystery lately. I am eating LOTS of good food.........in fact at a restaurant the other night I ate almost a whole 8 oz. prime rib with some cole slaw and green bean cassarole. I came home and had two skinny cow ice cream sandwiches, and in the morning I still weighed only 156!! I just am blown away by how my "tool" is working. It's like I eat lots and it just jettisons through my body and leaves the next morning without sticking around on my buh-tocks, legs, or belly. I feel odd complaining about this.....but naked I am skinny and scary to look at....and wish I could do a balloon trick and squish the fat on my hips and upper legs up, up, up to my deflated boobs and my scrawny shoulders. Mostly I'm grateful and feel healthy....so slap me for complaining at all!! I just don't understand how we are all so different in how we do after RNY surgery. "Tis a mystery.
I could write a page on each and every one of your shares...and should, but suffice it to say that I think about you all every day and m thankful for your successes and worry and send loving vibes to you when you are facing something unpleasant or downright painful. Hang on to these wonderful people, and you WILL make it through.
With so much aloha to you all.....amazing women/men in my life.
Aloha nui loa,
Maui Karen
I just had a chance to read your post nancy this morning before zipping out for a meeting. I get tired thinking about all you do, and inspired at the same time. Taking care of mother who is fading has to be one of the hardest acts of love ever done by a child to a parent. We like to think of them as healthy, wise, strong, champions of our lives, etc. I was very lucky with my parents (if you can say their dying was lucky). My father was an alcoholic with 13 years in AA, and he died at an AA meeting. His funeral included about 300 people many of whom stood up and praised my dad for helping them and keeping them alive. Made me very proud of him.
My mother was a religious believer in prayer and NOT doctors so she ended up in a sanitarium with a bowel obstruction that the medical personell could easily have broken up and saved her...but she preferred to pray about it as was her way. She never got help and died about 4 hours before I arrived from Maui so I did not get a chance to say good bye to her or to forgive her for perceived harm she had inflicted on me growing up. I know now that she did the best SHE knew how and was parroting the teachings of my grandmother before her. I rebelled and denied her religion when very young and that caused great family friction for a long while.
So many of you are dealing with parents at the ends of their lifetimes and I really feel for you. In addition you are also dealing with challenges with your own bodies and lives and your own families. I feel such pride in all of you for doing your best and sharing here with us. One day I will open up and give you "the rest of the story"in my case....not quite ready yet.
Happily I'm back to baby testing three mornings a week, and start at 5:30 when it's still dark outside. My average babies lately is 7 per day, with 9 the other day but two who were on monitors or in an incubator. I always have a surprise waiting for me when I enter the hospital at 5:30 in the morning.........how many babies waiting for me???
My weight is a mystery lately. I am eating LOTS of good food.........in fact at a restaurant the other night I ate almost a whole 8 oz. prime rib with some cole slaw and green bean cassarole. I came home and had two skinny cow ice cream sandwiches, and in the morning I still weighed only 156!! I just am blown away by how my "tool" is working. It's like I eat lots and it just jettisons through my body and leaves the next morning without sticking around on my buh-tocks, legs, or belly. I feel odd complaining about this.....but naked I am skinny and scary to look at....and wish I could do a balloon trick and squish the fat on my hips and upper legs up, up, up to my deflated boobs and my scrawny shoulders. Mostly I'm grateful and feel healthy....so slap me for complaining at all!! I just don't understand how we are all so different in how we do after RNY surgery. "Tis a mystery.
I could write a page on each and every one of your shares...and should, but suffice it to say that I think about you all every day and m thankful for your successes and worry and send loving vibes to you when you are facing something unpleasant or downright painful. Hang on to these wonderful people, and you WILL make it through.
With so much aloha to you all.....amazing women/men in my life.
Aloha nui loa,
Maui Karen
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