It really was my son!
Dear Betsy,
You are a sweet wonderful woman who is a great mom. Now is the time to really sit back, take a deep breath and analyze your situation. What is best for you and your family right now? What to you expect the outcome to be if you and your daughter go see your son? Yes, he's your baby and always will be but you don't want to become an enabler or worse put your family in danger. Right now you know he's being taken care of.
Please be careful if you go the route of guardianship. Do you really want the responsibility of taking care of your son and dealing with anything he might do. You raised him the best you could. You stated you tried to get him help but at that time nothing was available. Your son is an adult and now has to deal with the consequences of his actions. Drugs have taken it's toll on him. He's mentally unstable.
All ready you have described yourself as being stressed out to the max. Stop right now, be quiet and listen to God. Take in the Peace. Really listen. No one knows the answers except for God. Let God embrace you right now. He's surrounding you right this very minute with His love and acceptance.
I too know what your going through. My nephew who is 20 is in rehab. He is unstable, threatened his family, stole money, lied, he is not the boy we knew but a drug infested person who is blaming others. I too worry someday we will find him dead. You love them but you can't live their life. He once was a very bright child but no more, he is a shell of a person, not to be trusted and needs to be watched. There are a lot of people just like my nephew and your son. They can destroy the whole family if you let them. So don't. Worry doesn't help either. Worry is such a useless emotion. What's better? To honestly give it up to God, once you do, life will be better. I'm sending you hugs and will keep you and your family in my prayers.
You are a sweet wonderful woman who is a great mom. Now is the time to really sit back, take a deep breath and analyze your situation. What is best for you and your family right now? What to you expect the outcome to be if you and your daughter go see your son? Yes, he's your baby and always will be but you don't want to become an enabler or worse put your family in danger. Right now you know he's being taken care of.
Please be careful if you go the route of guardianship. Do you really want the responsibility of taking care of your son and dealing with anything he might do. You raised him the best you could. You stated you tried to get him help but at that time nothing was available. Your son is an adult and now has to deal with the consequences of his actions. Drugs have taken it's toll on him. He's mentally unstable.
All ready you have described yourself as being stressed out to the max. Stop right now, be quiet and listen to God. Take in the Peace. Really listen. No one knows the answers except for God. Let God embrace you right now. He's surrounding you right this very minute with His love and acceptance.
I too know what your going through. My nephew who is 20 is in rehab. He is unstable, threatened his family, stole money, lied, he is not the boy we knew but a drug infested person who is blaming others. I too worry someday we will find him dead. You love them but you can't live their life. He once was a very bright child but no more, he is a shell of a person, not to be trusted and needs to be watched. There are a lot of people just like my nephew and your son. They can destroy the whole family if you let them. So don't. Worry doesn't help either. Worry is such a useless emotion. What's better? To honestly give it up to God, once you do, life will be better. I'm sending you hugs and will keep you and your family in my prayers.
HI Betsy,
I am new to the OFF...but not to OH. I am so sorry that you found your son in the situation that you did. But hey....he is alive and seems to me that God did protect him from harm while he was incarsarated. Where there is life there is "hope". Miracles do happen everyday. Hopefully God will send someone to touch him in a moment when he will listen and change his heart. People everyday do totally turn their lives around with God's help. I have a 23 yr old who does drugs and trust me....I totally understand the hurt and dissapointment that you are feeling. I know I pray for my son daily. Sometimes he goes weeks without calling us. He says that he only smokes pot but hey....I am not stupid and I know that it can and sometimes does lead to harder things. I too expect a call daily that he has ODed or died. I pray for him and his ( livein ) girlfriend daily. He is NOT living the life that he was raised in nor does he have the values that my husband and I instilled in him growing up. Trust me....I feel your pain. I will pray for you daily along with James. Praying also that you will be able to contact the judge in charge and explain that you think ( or rather know ) that James would be better off in a institution when he can be safe. Please keep us updated....praying for your family !!!! Hugs to you my dear !!!!
Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian
I am new to the OFF...but not to OH. I am so sorry that you found your son in the situation that you did. But hey....he is alive and seems to me that God did protect him from harm while he was incarsarated. Where there is life there is "hope". Miracles do happen everyday. Hopefully God will send someone to touch him in a moment when he will listen and change his heart. People everyday do totally turn their lives around with God's help. I have a 23 yr old who does drugs and trust me....I totally understand the hurt and dissapointment that you are feeling. I know I pray for my son daily. Sometimes he goes weeks without calling us. He says that he only smokes pot but hey....I am not stupid and I know that it can and sometimes does lead to harder things. I too expect a call daily that he has ODed or died. I pray for him and his ( livein ) girlfriend daily. He is NOT living the life that he was raised in nor does he have the values that my husband and I instilled in him growing up. Trust me....I feel your pain. I will pray for you daily along with James. Praying also that you will be able to contact the judge in charge and explain that you think ( or rather know ) that James would be better off in a institution when he can be safe. Please keep us updated....praying for your family !!!! Hugs to you my dear !!!!
Hugs and blessings ~~~ Vivian
GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CAN NOT CHANGE; COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS THAT I CAN; AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE !!!! THIS IS MY DAILY PRAYER.
Vivian Prouty Obesity Help Support Group Coach "LOSE IT 4 LIFE"
Oh, Betsy. . when I read your topic subject my heart did a leap into my throat. Through an amazing act of kindness, you located your son! God bless you for never giving up. Like all the others have said, give it to God and he will lead the way. Your steps will become clear with God at the reins.
Take care of Yourself.
Elaine
All you need is the plan, the road map, and the courage to press
on to your destination.
on to your destination.
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