Please help.

Hello all

I am feeling so discouraged.  I hope you don't mind me venting here. I really try not to, but if I know you all will understand how I'm feeling.
 
First I had to do the 6 month medically supervised diet and did that and then as part of the preop testing I had a stress test and that showed a 2 blockages in my coronary artery.  I had a stent put into one of the blockages and am now doing cardiac rehab.

My cardiologist said that it would  now be up to 1 YEAR before I can have my RNY and that I should  just 'continue as before, dieting and exercising".    I am so frustrated!   At first he said 6 months, now it's 12 months!

Last weekend my hubby and I were involved in a 3 car accident. I was taken from the scene in a neckbrace and on a backboard/. Fortunately, I have only whiplash and my back is hurting but the chiropractor is taking care of that.   My car is operable (we were rear-ended by a car that wa**** from behind.  we skidded about 10 feet!) 

So now I'm having problems doing cardiac rehab cause of my back and my diet is not as it should be because I find myself craving and going towards my old 'comfort foods' of pasta and bread.  I had ice cream last night.  I know I should not be having this, but i gravitated right towards it.

I am very concerned because I was so motivated, and if I go towards the emotional eating, after all I have learned, I now wonder if I AM a good candidate for this surgery.    I've never felt this way before and It frightens me.        I am usually so focused and now I'm not.

I'm on pain meds and flexeril so I'm flying high most of the time here.   My concern is if I have the surgery and something likke a car accident happens again or whatever happens, that I mess up and eat my way back thru the weight I've lost.

ugh.

I just ranted and whined.  so unlike me.   i want the me back..the focused me.    where did she go?  is she lost in the medications?   

please, help me get my mind back in focus.

thanks, Linda

 

I fear the same thing and I wasn't even in an accident. I lost my focus two months ago while waiting for my six month diet to end. I decided to look for something that would change my emotional eating habits. I belong to a group that helps with that but I needed something more personal to help me and I found a book which is helping me overcome my emotional eating. It's called "Shrink Yourself--Break free from emotiional eating Forever" Maybe in the year you have to wait you can conquer those emotional urges to eat. The book sure has me focused. It is written by Dr Roger Gould and I got it through Amazon.com. Maybe it will help you too. Love Nancy

Sweets.  You have had a lot happen to you in a short time.  You are under stress even with minor injuries from the wreck and your heart needs attention.  Do you have a relaxation regimen with meditation, visulizations, breathing exercises, or other technique?  Seek some out.  Get some short term counseling from a pastor or mental health agency.  Nancy's book sounds good, too.  Keep you eye on the prize of a healthy you & know that we support you.

Thanks, Nancy

I will buy that book this weekend.     I don't want to lose my focus.  I want to heal from both the accident and the heart stent placement.   I guess I may actually be stressed but either not knowing it or accepting it.

Linda

Linda,

I can so relate to your losing motivation.   It took me forever to get my medical clearance for wls.  The first was that I have bad lungs from a fungal infection, second even before wls, I ran a really low iron count and my blood count was never high enough for surgery and when it got even close they hurried up and did the surgery.  It took me a year of waiting and taking new meds and txs and more meds and on and on and I had all but given up when the doctor sent me for my last lung scan and said, let's get your lab done and hurry up before you get sick again.  I didn't tell but one or two people on the board that I was having surgery because I was afraid it would be cancelled like it had before.  So, imagine their surprise when my hubby called Jan and said, she's weak, she's on a ventilator, but she's on the bench, scoot on down.  YOu will too, you will get  here and the prize will be even sweeter than if you just had the surgery.

wow.  you folks are fantastic.  Thank you so much for your post.   I know I am not alone, and that has made such a difference!

Linda

Hi Linda,
It is sometimes a "rough damn road" isn't it? I can relate. During my pre-op testing my doctors found breast cancer and some heart "things" that required a deeper look. I had to go through more tests and cancer treatment, but lo and behold, I got my weight loss surgery- just later than I had planned. Try to relax and heal. And try not to be so hard on yourself!
Julia

Hi Julia

Yes, it is a rough damn road sometimes, but it's not impossible I know.  I am glad that you are a survivor and you are an insipiration to me.   

Thank you for your post. It means a lot to me.

Linda

Hi Linda,

I can relate to your post.  It seems it is so easy to get distracted and off our course and so hard to stay on track when life throws us a curve.   I did my 6 months med supervised diet and was "successful" on it,  then my doc decided because I was so successful I should keep doing what I'm doing without wls.  throw in a few stressful personal curve balls, and I'm all over the place the last few months

What I have learned from our very dear friends on this board (who have been where we are) is to start over again; focus on this moment, that for right now I will make healthy choices and stay on track, even if I have to repeat that to myself 100 times in a day or more to stay on track it helps.  Instead on eating a whole package of cookies, like before,  I can choose to have 1 or 2 or pick up an apple or cheese stick instead.  but I can't take it for granted.  If I had been able to have a "normal" relationship with food, I never would have gotten to 292 pounds.  So for now I am stuck at 240-244, still working on the things I have learned so far.  I figure I'm a work in progress and beating myself up over mistakes doesn't fix anything.  I just have to keep working on the choices I make and go forward on my journey.  I guess I am where I am supposed to be right now.

Good luck to you and just keep working at it.
Hugs, Paulette

I have worked so damn hard to get where I am now and to have the one thing I wanted snatch from me and moved so far away has been such an emotional let down for me.  
It took me forever to make the decision to have WLS and I was so close! 

You are right, though. No sense beating myself up over anything actually.  It's bad for the soul. I'll just keep putting one foot in front of the other and do my best every day. And if I slip up for an hour, I still have the next hour to get it right .

Thanks for your post Paulette!

Linda