New to this forum, have delicate question

Hi, I usually hang out on the VA form since that's where my Dr. and hospital are, but as my surgery gets closer (Wednesday, the 21st) I'm getting scared so I'm turning to you all for help.

I've had several people ask me why I would have such a major elective surgery at my age (53).
As a nurse I know the statistics and risks, and I thought I had come to terms with them. But one little voice keeps saying, what if you die from this?

It did't help that my mother (who lives with us) asked me today if my "wishes" were known by my husband just in case?

I know I could be sitting here and have a plane crash into the house and die just as easily, when its time its time, but for some reason my mortality has come to stare me in the face. I feel guilty taking this risk even for my health and the wellbeing of my family.

Any words of wisdom would be welcome.

Thank you,

Barb


Thank you

Welcome to the Over 50 forums Barb. I had my surgery when I was 55. I figured my chances on death where far greater and sooner than if I chose not to do something about weight, Yes like all the others, have done and tired all the other diets.

If given a change to change my mind would I? heck no. My life now is of such a better quality. It is  a lifestyle we have to make and be committed to.

Good luck to you and I wish you an uneventful surgery.


Darlene

Barb, you don't mention your comorbidities, but if you are like most of us were pre-op, your health is not very good.  I believe if I had not had wls, I would have been dead in five years anyway.  It is normal to have doubts, fears, and concerns about your decision.  Girl, the odds are in your favor!  Take a few deep breaths, try to relax, and know we're here for you.
Debbie

I just had my rny this wednesday. I'm home and in one piece and none the worse for wear, Yea, speed bumps present a problem, but other than that, its a go. I'm 61, so age is no excuse. I had the same thoughts go thru my head as well, your not the first or will you be the last. Its a life altering change, no doubt about it. But you take chances with anything you do in life, walking outside to get the paper and being struck by wayward driver, but you can't dwell on these. Sure, I made my wishes known, but they were known before hand. It's when your pregnant, you always get the stories about the horrers of labor and birth. Well...this is the same thing. I came thru fine, no complications at all. If you have the confidence in your surgeon, he will do good by you. Worry if you must, because we all do, but go thru with it, you'll be glad you did. Even a close friend of mine had the surgery and what would or could go wrong, did. But she recovered, lost more than she weighs now, and says she would do again in a heartbeat. So hang in there, think the good thoughts, and all of us on the board will be praying for you.

Sherry (already lost 7 lbs.)

I laughed at the speed bumps remark - I cringed over every speed bump for the first 2 weeks after the surgery. 
I am 54, had the surgery 4 1/2 months ago, and have already lost 67 lbs. (I'm down to 141 lbs. on my 5'1" body).  Size 20W down to 10 petite! 
I only wish I'd done this sooner!

I was 54 when I had my RNY May 2008. I am down a total of 140 pounds since 1/1/2008. I didn't tell anyone until I absolutely had to, since my son and sister were so opposed to it 3 years ago (I made the mistake of telling them). This time I just went for it!

I have had a lot of difficulty with eating but I am a rare case. I am finally able to eat now (still have an occasional problem). It was all so worth it! I am wearing size 10 jeans (was crammed into size 26). It is amazing how this surgery changes your life. This procedure has become so well tuned that major problems are rare.

Because of my eating problems I do have low iron adn have to take an RXd iron supplement.

Best wishes to you!

I had my surgery when I was 54, & it was the best thing I ever did for myself, My diabetes & BP were out oc control, now the only meds I take are suppliments & vitamins. I am 56 now and 5 weeks ago I had a tummy tuck and in april I am having a thigh lift and I am doing this all for myself becaus I want to I had RNY to get healthy now I am healthy and I want to look good. I am married to a wonderful man who fell in love with me @ 270 lbs and loves me the way I was and am.
 I have no problems Thank God, this surgery changed my life for the better I feel 20 years yonger.

Good Luck with your decision
Susan

Hi and Welcome to the OFF bunch.  I am 66 and had RNY on November 19th, 2008 and have lost a total of 51 pounds.  I feel great and have had no problems with anything and I would do it again in a heart beat.  I am down from a size 24-26 to a 16 and the pounds continue to fall off.  It is natural to be a little apprehensive with any kind of surgery.  I did this because of High Blood Pressure, Sleep Apnea, High Cholesterol and I just plain wanted my life back and to enjoy things like I used to.
You will do just fine and keep posting so we can see how you are doing, okay?

Sandy

 Hi...I was glad to read your post, as I was feeling just like you were. I too am 66 years old and will have the surgery January 23/09 I hope I will do as well as you are.  I too just want my life back so thanks for your post. Lola....Nervous and excited to begin a new year. Wish me luck!

Hi Lola!

My name is Joyce, and I am scheduled for an RNY Jan 26th. I am 61, but I am tired of having my 92-year-old mother able to continue to shop when I need to sit down. LOL.

I have not had this fear yet, but you are three days ahead of me!!! Maybe this discussion and the great responses will prevent me from having to worry so much!

My best to you, and I will be so happy to read that you are home again and doing well.

Joyce of Joyceisready