OT: Diva
For those of you who know me and have followed the saga of my cat, Diva, know she has been at her former mommy, who runs a cat rescue. Diva had been pooping outside the box for awhle late last year for no apparent reason. Since I was having knee surgery and knew it was going to be too difficult to bend down to clean up any messes she made, Jeanine (former mommy) and I agreed it was better if she took her back for awhile, had her checked out and tried to retrain her.
Well, Diva is fine physically. She has some dental issues and is scheduled for a cleaning next week. But she is still pooping outside the box at the cat rescue shelter, so apparently it is a behavioral problem. Jeanine has tried to retrain her, to no avail. At this point, it appears Diva will live out her life at the cat shelter. It is a no-kill shelter and she will have plenty of attention and love there. But I can't have her back here.
I feel like I lost her, like she's dead, even though I know she's not. I love her so much, but I know I can't deal with her issues, not now and probably not in the near future, unless Jeanine can retrain her (which she has tried to do and will try again). I know it's not same as Annette having to put Joey to sleep and I don't pretend that it is. Still, I miss her a lot. She is such a smart cat and so affectionate, I don't know why she is doing this. Only she knows, I guess.
I know she will be well-cared for at the shelter. She will live in the senior room, where it doesn't matter where she goes (it's very cleanable ... the senior cats often have kidney problems and bowel issues, so there are no rugs to worry about).
For now, I'm not getting another cat to replace her, just staying with Scooter and Nettie, who are very content, although I know they miss Diva, too.
Well, Diva is fine physically. She has some dental issues and is scheduled for a cleaning next week. But she is still pooping outside the box at the cat rescue shelter, so apparently it is a behavioral problem. Jeanine has tried to retrain her, to no avail. At this point, it appears Diva will live out her life at the cat shelter. It is a no-kill shelter and she will have plenty of attention and love there. But I can't have her back here.
I feel like I lost her, like she's dead, even though I know she's not. I love her so much, but I know I can't deal with her issues, not now and probably not in the near future, unless Jeanine can retrain her (which she has tried to do and will try again). I know it's not same as Annette having to put Joey to sleep and I don't pretend that it is. Still, I miss her a lot. She is such a smart cat and so affectionate, I don't know why she is doing this. Only she knows, I guess.
I know she will be well-cared for at the shelter. She will live in the senior room, where it doesn't matter where she goes (it's very cleanable ... the senior cats often have kidney problems and bowel issues, so there are no rugs to worry about).
For now, I'm not getting another cat to replace her, just staying with Scooter and Nettie, who are very content, although I know they miss Diva, too.
Eileen,
I know just how you are feeling and I digress to share my story of Max...
One day, my now exhusband, came home with a 9 week old rottweiler puppy, my initial reaction was like, are you nuts? Within hours I fell in love with that puppy and we named him Max, he became my shadow and even followed me to the bathroom. My exhusband was an emotional and physically abusive man and one day after an drunken episode of his physcial abuse, he was passed out and I called my Mom and told her I needed to leave, could I stay at her place until I figured out what to do, she said yes but was adamant that I could not bring the dog with me, Max was 11 months old at the time, I very carefully secreted out as much of my personal things as I could and luckily got away before my husband woke up to see what I was doing. I found a loving home for Max, a couple who had a home, with a backyard, the wife worked from home so the dog would not be left alone all day long, it was a great home for Max, my heart was broken though, I was more upset over having to give up Max then my husband, he was the first dog I had ever really had. For a period of time, through phone calls, I checked to see how he was doing and then finally I had to let go. So while Max lived, I still was heartbroken over the having to give him up, but it was necessary for all concerned, just as you giving up Diva is. It does not diminish the nature of the loss and you had Diva's company for the time you did and now she is in a place where, as you said, she will be cared for, so try to focus on the good part, she is still alive and loved and you were part of her loving life.
Hugs, Laureen
I know just how you are feeling and I digress to share my story of Max...
One day, my now exhusband, came home with a 9 week old rottweiler puppy, my initial reaction was like, are you nuts? Within hours I fell in love with that puppy and we named him Max, he became my shadow and even followed me to the bathroom. My exhusband was an emotional and physically abusive man and one day after an drunken episode of his physcial abuse, he was passed out and I called my Mom and told her I needed to leave, could I stay at her place until I figured out what to do, she said yes but was adamant that I could not bring the dog with me, Max was 11 months old at the time, I very carefully secreted out as much of my personal things as I could and luckily got away before my husband woke up to see what I was doing. I found a loving home for Max, a couple who had a home, with a backyard, the wife worked from home so the dog would not be left alone all day long, it was a great home for Max, my heart was broken though, I was more upset over having to give up Max then my husband, he was the first dog I had ever really had. For a period of time, through phone calls, I checked to see how he was doing and then finally I had to let go. So while Max lived, I still was heartbroken over the having to give him up, but it was necessary for all concerned, just as you giving up Diva is. It does not diminish the nature of the loss and you had Diva's company for the time you did and now she is in a place where, as you said, she will be cared for, so try to focus on the good part, she is still alive and loved and you were part of her loving life.
Hugs, Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
Thank you, Laureen, you do understand!
I am not even telling my mother about this. When I first told her Diva was pooping on the rug and how upset I was, I said, "I'm worried about Diva." She said, "I'm worried about your rug." I told her, screw the carpet, it can be cleaned. I'm worried Diva is sick and I can't do anything for her. My mom is a caring person, but doesn't understand about pets. She thinks carpets are more important than animals. My pets are my children ... I don't have children, and these are my babies. She wouldn't understand how upset losing Diva makes me, even though I know she will be well-cared for and loved at the shelter. But she won't be here with me.
I'm glad you told me your story ... you do understand how tough it is to surrender your pet, even though you know it's the best thing for the pet. Thank you!
I am not even telling my mother about this. When I first told her Diva was pooping on the rug and how upset I was, I said, "I'm worried about Diva." She said, "I'm worried about your rug." I told her, screw the carpet, it can be cleaned. I'm worried Diva is sick and I can't do anything for her. My mom is a caring person, but doesn't understand about pets. She thinks carpets are more important than animals. My pets are my children ... I don't have children, and these are my babies. She wouldn't understand how upset losing Diva makes me, even though I know she will be well-cared for and loved at the shelter. But she won't be here with me.
I'm glad you told me your story ... you do understand how tough it is to surrender your pet, even though you know it's the best thing for the pet. Thank you!
Eileen~ My heart goes out to you. We are animal lovers here in my family and extended family as well. We have one dog, a border collie/american eskimo mix and he will be having his 12th birthday the end of January. He is old, hard of hearing and cannot see too wll anymore and sheds terribly all over the house. He is so devoted to my hubby and me and also to our Son, DIL and Grandaughter. We vacuum very frequently and friends (animal less, I might add) wonder why we put up with hair all over. I always tell them "Jake" is a part of this family and I'll care for him just like I would any member of the family. We have also had a couple of cats but my DD and I became allergic a few years ago and cannot have felines around anymore. "Max" and "Callie" (Calico cat) had passed on before I became allergic so we didn't have to get rid of them just because of that. I've always maintained that you can tell alot about a person by how they treat their pets. Pet people seem to have more compassion and caring for others. But if a person has never been around pets or had any of their own does not mean they are not good people. Do I make any sense? Well anyway, I just thought I'd put in my two cents worth. LOL
Lover of Animals....Big or Small....Tame....or Wild
Sandy
I am sorry to know Diva is having issues and can't come home. It is always hard to lose a furry child,however it happens. DH and I are the founders and guardiane of a sanctuary for elder furry children and just today one of our dog children went for a trial visit with an adopter. It will be great for her and we hope it works out but I am walking the floor like a nut,can't settle to anything,etc.
Has the foster mom tried a completely brand new box? There is also a product called "Cat Attract" litter that is guaranteed to attract a cat back to the box. Was her box at your house near the washer and dryer? TSome don't like that;also elderly cats sometimes get arthritis in their hips and it hurts to step up and into/out of a tall box;a shallow box might be better or one with a ramp built into it.
It is good to know she will be happy and content there if she can't come back home and she will always live in your heart...
Holly
Has the foster mom tried a completely brand new box? There is also a product called "Cat Attract" litter that is guaranteed to attract a cat back to the box. Was her box at your house near the washer and dryer? TSome don't like that;also elderly cats sometimes get arthritis in their hips and it hurts to step up and into/out of a tall box;a shallow box might be better or one with a ramp built into it.
It is good to know she will be happy and content there if she can't come back home and she will always live in your heart...
Holly
Diva was only 7 years old and very agile, jumping all over the place. She had four litter boxes from which to choose, one of which was a kitten size box ... yet she chose to go outside the box many, many times, and apparently still is doing it at the shelter. My boxes were all in the spare bathroom, which is not far from the washer/dryer, but not that close; also, I had one in the spare bedroom, which was near the cat tower that Diva started pooping on late last year. I tried so many things ... didn't try the Cat Attract litter, but I'll bet Jeanine did, because she does this for a living and knows all tricks. I don't think Diva was arthritic, though ... she was very acrobatic.
Thanks for your concern.
Thanks for your concern.
Eileen,
I am also sorry about your loss and glad Diva is in a good shelter to go to.
We have a cat named PK who adopted us about 6 years ago. I had never had a cat before and wasn't too sure I wanted this one, but we have gotten very attached to him. I know how much love and attention we give him, and therefore know a bit how you are feeling.
Thinking of you.
Jeane
I am also sorry about your loss and glad Diva is in a good shelter to go to.
We have a cat named PK who adopted us about 6 years ago. I had never had a cat before and wasn't too sure I wanted this one, but we have gotten very attached to him. I know how much love and attention we give him, and therefore know a bit how you are feeling.
Thinking of you.
Jeane
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