Aaarrrghhh......please help

My surgeon's office called today.  My primary care doctor will not write a letter saying that I need surgery.........she thinks I am "not a good candidate"!!!!  WTF?  My BMI is 42!!!  I am on asthma meds, cholesterol med, and an antidepressant.........I have been on Weigh****chers, several times.........lost a few pounds, lost weight while going to Overeater's Annonymous, gained that all back and then some, worked with a sports trainer....did not lose weight.  Did I not try hard enough, am I just a fat idiot?  A fat lazy idiot?  I am thinking I am so dumb!!!

My primary care DR lost over 100 pounds on Weigh****hcers and has kept it off for about four years. 

Have any of you been here?  What was your "defining moment" when you decided you knew you wanted to have the surgery?

I have another local doctor who I will talk to about writing a letter for me.  I have talked to her about it before.......she seemed supportive.  BUT she also has lost weight with Weigh****chers.........ugh!!!!!!!I could JUST SCREAM!!!!!

Well, thanks for listening.  But really, and "defining moments" out there?

Thanks and hugs...........Vickie

I admire those who can stick with a diet AND really admire those who lose and manage to keep it off. However, we are all not cut from the same mold. Your doctor should know that.  I  had tried, lost, regained so many times that I just totally lost hope.  Did that make me a terrible person? No, but it did make me be one that really needed the surgery.  I weighed 377 lbs in Feb of 2005. I still would like to lose more but I am maintaining a185 lb loss almost 4 yrs later. I am not sure that I would be alive had I not had surgery. Tell your Primary Care Doctor to put that on her plate and chew on it. Don't give up. If you really feel that this is what you need to do, keep at it until you find an understanding doctor. They are out there. I totally agree that everyone is not a candidate for WLS and it is not something to jump into unprepared. That being said, you are the only one who ultimately can know what is best for you. Hang in there.

Actually, I never told my primary physician until everything was all set.   I didn't have to go through him to have the surgery.  It was my decision.  Of course, once I told him, he was okay with it.  He did not like it when this one weight loss Dr. put me on Phentermine, he is totally against that.
Do you have to have your primary Dr's approval?

Mickey

CHANGE DOCTORS!!!

No, I don't THINK I have to have my primary care DR's "ok" , but I was/am just so shocked that she said she didn't think I was a good candidate for surgery.......and no reason.

I do go to another DR who practices here in town so I think she will write the letter for me.......I hope anyway!!!

Thanks for the responses!

V

i went through the same thing.i lost 100 lbs with weigh****chers before havent the surgery.but gain it back.but it was mine fault for doing that/my primary had me to go to weigh****chers.but my life fell apart when i lost my sister. and everything seems to keep falling down hill.after that the dr dsaid i needed the surgery.since 2004 i kept it off until last year at this time i had knee in oct done.then again in dec.but the dr who done the stomach had me to get back to weigh****chers for support so i would not gain my weight.if not for the food weigh****chers but for the support group they have.i try going to my surgery dr meetings but have never got back to those.but its hard to do when you can not do much excrise but walk.at one time i was a excrise fool.i love my kicking boxing and steps class,weights.but now you can call a sitter.i try walking and do some weights but that not enough for me.i wish sometimes i never had knee surgery,but if i didnt i would not be waking today.not fast but slow like an a women in her 80;s.i have gain weight due not doing much but walk.yes im going to try getting back to weigh****chers for support.if not for food for people been around me to help.like this over 50 board.have a great wed.


marylyn

vickie-it is disconcerting to hear that one's own doc is not supportive-however-if you don't need the approval as a pre req for insurance-then go fwd without it! if you do-then change docs as was suggested!

part of me would stick with that doc just to prove a point after you successfully lose-however-the intelligent part will say that you need a doc who is supportive for aftercare because our needs do change-meds we can take and blood tests etc...example: a friend who had surgery when i did was recently very sick with cold and took come otc meds her dad had-burned her belly good --she is ok but she was in pain for several hours one nite!

i know this doesn't make you feel great but am sending special hugs to you! go fwd and conquer my dear!!!!!!

as for the other part of your post-my defining moment i addressed i think in my profile- i could no longer attend to personal care issues (couldn't wipe my butt)--and i could def not run and play with my granddaughters-heck i couldn't do anything with them!

I will send up a prayer that the other doctor writes the letter for you. Too bad your regular doctor is being such a pain right now.  Don't give up!!

Hugs...connie d