Heavy Heart...
Dear Donna,
I am so sorry for your loss! I certainly know the pain, as I had 12 miscarriages. Each is so painful and comes with so many feelings! The only thing that got me through some of them was to acknowledge them and make others acknowledge them! I hated to hear..."You can have another" or "It was God's will." Okay...to an extent. However, it was a baby and it was life! It is an extreme loss that will be in your hearts forever!!
I actually decided to have a pseudo-memorial service for each. I wrote letter to the baby and attached it to a balloon and sent it off to heaven. Somehow this seemed to ease the pain. To this day, I pick one day a year, (usually a sunny spring day), I go to a quiet place--sometimes a cemetary, sometimes a park, sometimes my backyard, and send a bright yellow balloon up to the heavens with one note to all of "babies" thanking them for watching over us here on earth.
This is a method that seems to help me deal with the devastating losses in a perpetual way.
Hugs to you and your son and his girlfriend!
Lora
Donna,
My heart goes out to your family, a miscarriage at any stage is sad and no words comfort, so my prayers go out for love and time to bring healing.
Hugs, Laureen
My Mantra is that I do not determine my success by the number hanging in my closet, nor will I let the scale determine that success either. . . It is through trial and error I will continue to grow and succeed. . . Laureen
"Success is a journey, not a destination." Ben Sweetland
I hope a gentle hug will help.
Aloha nui loa,
Maui Karen
JeanB
Donna, I am so sorry to hear about the miscarriage. I, like others here, had two miscarriages, and one was at 20 weeks, so I understand how sad your son and his girlfriend must be, as well as everyone in your family anticipating a new life to join you. It was heartbreaking for me, and I just want to offer you my deepest condolences, and wishes for some peace around it. Not much I can say will make it better, but please know I am thinking of you all.
Cara
Cara
When you get older, you realize it's a lot less about your place in the world but your place in you. It's not how everyone views you, but how you view yourself. - Natalie Portman
I too heard all of the "nice" words of "You can have others" and the such. But you can never replace the baby that was loss. They are an individual and deserve the respect that their life, even tho it was brief, mattered. They made an impact of people's lives and can never be replaced.
I will be keeping all of you in my prayers and I am sending love and gentle, healing hugs to all of you.
It's not what you gather, but what you scatter
that tells what kind of life you have lived.
