OT: Clutter/hoarding ...whatever...update

a few months ago i came here asking for help with my clutter issues..i was, at that time, completely overwhelmed and -today- am not doing a tremendous amount better, altho at least i am not having anxiety issues today!!! 

i wanna brag on me for a minute....

in order to move the computer desk into the small bedroom, i had to move everything out of one corner -where i had neatly stacked boxes of "stuff"...one of the boxes was a huge, huge  box that a home and garden party had been delivered in a few years back...it was brim full of magazines, catalogs  and "free" newspapers , etc...i could barely move it and think i hurt myself doing so--now-that was what- two ??? weeks ago?? maybe three???anyhow- today i finally emptied that box!!! there are 8 doubled plastic bags of magazines etc going to the curb, two bags going to the post office ( there is a bench where ppl put books and mags to trade) ; i'm sending MORE ,Oprah, Birds and Blooms and Country (and those types) and Guideposts, Positive Thinking and Angels to the PO bench! now- i DID save some- my Mary Englebreit and Cottage Living, Midwest Living, Hawaii, Bird Talk and AARP's...also the Kraft Food and Family- Michael loves those!!! and i have some pertaining to weight loss and fitness.... i know that i am far from being decluttered but i feel so much better today knowing that i finally tackled that box!!!!

while michael has been painting etc the outside of the house, he has used the middle of the garage floor as his workbench and i need to reclaim that area to go back to cleaning out the garage--it's been over a month since i have been out there working and i really need to get back to it! that is where i will find boxes of "very important junk" that take a long time to sort thru...i will...i just have to get him to clean his mess....

one day at a time......this post is prompted, in part, by jean m's wonderful post about her mother's cr*p and by cheryl talking about her mom ....i grew up in organized clutter; i had a wonderful role model...my adopted mom was great at saving stuff! unopened mail, etc...my natural mother is worse! so i come by it honestly...and i don't want michael or my kids to have to ever deal with all of my stuff! tho i know that there will be some questions when they have to go thru my jewelry box!!! when my kids were growing up, very often our 8 ft dining table was full of piles- i knew exactly where stuff was til you moved it!!! and i still am somewhat that way--tho the piles have been moved too often lately!!!

my goal is to actually get the house presentable enough inside (michael has done exceptionally well outside) to put it up for sale--and i am trying...i still marvel at the thought of moving into a smaller place...this house is truly too big for us....and it seems that the more space we had, the more clutter we both allowed in here....

a realtor came thru last week to give michael an estimate of the house's potential listing price..she went into the back bedroom ( where i had moved stuff from the middle room and also have many boxes that my daughter and i had packed) ( i KNOW i have to finish cleaning and fix the bed up pretty again etc) - she kindof gasped and asked why we needed all this stuff! well; in her house, i am sure that her books are neatly in a book case or shelf NOT in boxes , her family pictures are on the wall or table NOT in boxes, and her Christmas tablecloths and dishes are in a cupboard or linen closet NOT in boxes, etc.....c'mon folks....

as i said, one day at a time.........
thx for listening.....this was cathartic......

I AM A PACK RAT ALSO!  I HAVE A HARD TIME THROWING ANYTHING AWAY.  ALWAYS HAVE BEEN THAT WAY.  I ALWAYS THINK THAT I MAY NEED IT IN THE FUTURE.   WHEN MY MOM DIED 2 YEARS AGO, I GOT A LOT OF ITEMS, ETC. AND JUST THE IDEA OF THROWING THEM AWAY IS TOO HARD.

JOY

My husband is the same way.  He loves newspapers, magazines, junk mail etc.  WE have a communter marriage.  I am a pastor and have a parsonage in one little town and about 45 minutes away he has his farm and farmhouse.  He is the 3rd generation to live there and I swear there are still things left from his grandparents! I feel totally overwhelmed when I go there and spend the entire time reading and sleeping.

Jeane

You are not alone. I am terrible about keeping stupid stuff. When I try to sort thru stuff I get overwhelmed. I have to look at each piece and decide if I need to keep it. I am talking  about junk. Pens, paper articles I could find online and stuff like that. I just have a hard time deciding. Now when it comes to big desisions I have no problem. I decide fast and stick to it. Its all the little things that get me. I would be a hoarder if it weren't for my husband. he hates clutter and thats what we fight about. I am trying to change and I believe my weight is holding me back. I think I am hiding behind my stuff. I am making a big effort to change. I plan on becoming a new person. I fully understand how good you feel when you are able to let go of things. It helps me to donate things,especially if I give it to someone or someplace I know will use it. I cring at tossing stuff out in the trash,my DH will sneak things out to the trash on pickup day hoping I won't notice and half the time I don't. I guess it wasn't important after all. Little by little it gets better and easier. CONGRATS on your progress.

Flylady.com is a nifty site.

I LOVE Flylady.  I've been "flying" with her for a few months, and it has really helped my clutter issues!

My in-laws were both packrats.  When my mother-in-law passed away we had to clean out the house.  Oh... My... Word.  The trash we threw out.  Magazines from 1950s.  Teacher training aids from the same timeframe (just a little outdated).  The worst was under my father-in-law's side of the bed there were several boxes.  Boxes.  Of scratched off LOSING lottery tickets.  Over $10,000 worth.

Now, Mary and I are packrats.  But whenever I start to think that, I say to myself "but not as bad as them."

HI Margo,

My great aunt was quite the packrat.  She slept in a recline for almost 20 years because she couldn't get to her bed.  When she died in the early 1980s it took my parents over 4 months to clean out the house.  They found National Geographic magazines back to the 1930s when the magazine first started.  I remember my mother calling me after about 2 months into this and telling me they found a car in the garage.  The problem was my aunt was known to hide money everywhere so my mother felt it was kind of important to go through most everything.

I know you are making progress and will continue to progress!  I was so happy to get through all our clutter when we downsized to the condo 4 years ago.  I don't have any place to keep anything so it's a constant battle to throw things away for me.  I've missed alot of things along the way but I don't regret not having tons of stuff!

Hugs,

Kathi

Having moved so many times in my life, I try not to keep so much stuff. I think the worst time was when I moved from South Dakota to Georgia and the guys packing me up actually REFUSED to pack me for a day because it was too dirty in the house (they were real jerks) ... I had to pitch in and help out ... they told the supervisor I wasn't ready for them. (like you had to have things in order for them to pack ... I found out when I was in Georgia you didn't do that; they just started packing and you supervised!) Anyway, I threw out so much stuff that the garbage pickup came by twice that week and I still had stuff on the curb on Saturday when I left. I have never left that much behind when I've moved since. I don't keep magazines that long anymore ... if I'm done with them, they get thrown out or given away (a coworker likes to have my Time magazines when I'm done with them). However, I really do need to go through my photographs and put them in a book ... I have so many of them and I know someday my relatives would like them in a book when I die instead of in boxes.

My psychologist and I have talked about decluttering and getting rid of "stuff" ... she wants me to sell my bobbleheads, but this is a collection and I'm not ready to part with them, or at least most of them. I worked hard to get them! But I really do need to sell or get rid of some stuff. And I'm not moving ... or at least I hope I'm not moving.

Margo,

It's great you are making progress. . .  I know how hard it is to part with things, that we are convinced once gone, we will need them for something. . .  when my Mom died 7 years ago, she had lived in the same 2 bedroom apartment for 29 years,  I had the fun chore of sorting through and getting rid of some of her stuff so I could make room for my stuff, a year and a half later, I bought my home, it is a small home and I then had to begin sifting through her and my stuff to decide what to take with me when I made the move, it took me close to 6 weeks and I parted with lots of things, now 5 and a half years later, I have done better, but I now have more stuff and lately I'm trying to purge what is not necessary, but it's an ongoing battle.  I do declutter my dining room table weekly though and like you I come by this honestly. . .now I have a roommate who is a bit of a hoarder and my basement is full of her stuff, as well as two of the crawlspaces in my attic, so I had to tell her to consolidate and get rid of things, as I don't like the clutter in my basement, so this coming Sunday I am taking her and a bunch of her stuff to the flea market, where hopefully, someone else will want to buy her stuff.  I always remember the George Carlin skit on stuff. . .  seems we are always collecting and then having to try to get rid of. . .

Hugs and best wishes on the job of getting rid of things. . .  Laureen