I lost a brother....

My brother that lives in so cal called me.... our brother Mitch died yesterday. He has lived in Kauai for the past 20 years and I think I have talked to him maybe 5 times in all those years... He was 59. My sister, who also lived on Kauai died a few years ago at age 58....

When we were growing up Mitch was the athlete... strong, fast, an excellent swimmer... but then the 60's got him and drugs became the thing... and he never let them go... neither did my sister.

He was pretty much a bully, being 6 years older than me... the only thing we ever did together that we both loved was surfing and frisbee... After I went into the military we never really saw much of each other or had anything to do with each other... I was in the Coast Guard and a Federal Law Enforcement Officer as one of my principal jobs and he was smoking or snorting drugs and working only long enough to get some money and he was off again...

But I am so sad it is killing me right now...

Sorry for laying this on you but I feel like I need to talk to someone about this and I don't have anyone... so thanks for listening....

Marc, I am so sorry for your loss.  I feel your pain and hope that you are able to grieve for him and get past this. I know that it is not much comfort right now but you must remember that the ultimate reward for living is dying.  I have a brother who has had some problems with drugs also and I understand the pain for not being able to help them.  I will keep you and your family in my prayers.  Sending good thoughts your way.

Hugs

Dear Mark,

I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my prayers. I lost a best friend because of drug use. I too lost touch with him over the years and I wish I could have seen him at least one more time. I was sad he had wasted his life. He was smart, kind, and generous. I still think of him with sadness. Hopefully your sadness will lesson as you share it.


God bless you, Nancy

Marc, I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I know nothing I say can make thngs better. Just know you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Nan

Marc, I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Death is always something that is hard to understand no matter the cir****tances. The death of a sibling is especially difficult since that brings to us our own mortality. Siblings are also our first friends and that is always hard too.

I personally think that part of the sadness that you are feeling right now is not only for the loss of your brother but also the sadness of what could and should have been. We never like the thought of those that we love wasting their time on this earth. Maybe the whole thing happened so that he could be used as a example. Maybe that way you won't feel that his life was for naught.

I will be keeping you in my special prayers. I pray that God keeps you in the circle of His loving and healing arms and brings to you understanding, and healing with this whole situation. It isn't going to easy but you will get through it and you will be a better person for having to go through this. I am sending love and hugs to you dear brother. Please remember that we are here for you when ever you need us for anything.

Marc, nobody can truthfully say they know how you feel.  We can however relate to what you are going through.  I had a brother who was 3 years older than me.  In the early 70s he married a girl who did not like our family.  She forbid him to have anything to do with me.  The only contact we really had was the day I was best man at his wedding (I think she reluctantly agreed to that).   About 3 or 4 years later they separated.  He would never divorce her because he felt she would come back to him.  In 1992 he was diagnosed with a brain tumor the size of a softball.  He was given 6 months to live, but didn't make it 3 weeks.  I loved him.  I missed him. But we didn't talk much because of what he had become in life (an alcholic *****fused to acknowledge his problem).  I still think about him and what I could have done different.  That will always stay with me.  And your brother will always stay with you. 

Prayers for you buddy.

I AM SORRY MARC.  MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.
JOY

Marc, 

I am so sorry to read about the loss of your brother.  I wish there was something I could say that would make you feel better, but I know that is not possible right now.  Please accept my deepest sympathies to you and your family.  I just wanted you to know  I am thinking of you, and wishing for you that you can remember the good times, and find some peace.

Huggs,

Cara

Marc,

Of course you are sad. This was a loss for you no matter the relationship - he was your brother... I am sorry for your loss.

Annette

It is a very sad thing to lose a brother at such a young age and possibly for choices he made in his life. I lost my brother at the age of 37 to aids. I was not able to be close to him because of his wife who did not care much for us. I regret not being able to get to know him as a well adult and I miss him very much. As teens we were pretty close and got into a lot of trouble together. Then we grew apart from different life choices. I am lucky though because he left behind a son and a daughter who I am now close too and feel like they are my own children. I am really sorry you have to suffer this pain.