A funny for ya...
A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around.
A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Did you call for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me." Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with her.
The man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sits down, he farts.
Within minutes a huge, hairy man lumbers out of the steam room toward him, "Did you call for me?" says the hairy man.
"No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new," says the hairy man, "it's a rule that if you fart, it
implies that you called for me." The huge man easily spins him around, bends him over a bench and has his way with him.
The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she says. The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the $500 membership fee."
"But, Sir," she replies, "you've only been here for a few hours. You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities." The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 53 years old. I only get an erection once a month. I fart 15 times a day."
A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says, "Did you call for me?" The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new here. Let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me." Smiling, she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with her.
The man continues to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sits down, he farts.
Within minutes a huge, hairy man lumbers out of the steam room toward him, "Did you call for me?" says the hairy man.
"No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new," says the hairy man, "it's a rule that if you fart, it
implies that you called for me." The huge man easily spins him around, bends him over a bench and has his way with him.
The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist, "May I help you?" she says. The man yells, "Here's my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the $500 membership fee."
"But, Sir," she replies, "you've only been here for a few hours. You haven't had the chance to see all our facilities." The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 53 years old. I only get an erection once a month. I fart 15 times a day."
ooh, I'm glad I wandered over to this forum! I'm looking into a DS and usually hang out at that forum.
I know a TON of jokes. For instance:
A mechanical engineer was mowing his lawn when his friend the electrical engineer came by.
"Guess what just happened to me!" exclaimed the elec. engineer. "I was out in front of my house when a beautiful woman rode up on a bicycle. She got off the bike, took off ALL her clothes, lay down on the lawn, and said to me, ' Take what you want!'
The mech. engineer nodded in approval, "Good choice, I would have chosen the bicycle too: her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway!"
ok, speaking of lawns....
A man was driving down the road when he saw a huge house up on a hill. On the lawn in front of it were quite a number of women, completely nude, lying on the grass. The man was driving too fast to stop, so at the next gas station he pulled in to ask about what he had seen.
"What's with that house back there, with all the naked women out front?" he asked the gas station manager.
"Oh, that's the retirement home for aging hookers," said the manager. "They're having a yard sale!"
: )
Nancy in NC
I know a TON of jokes. For instance:
A mechanical engineer was mowing his lawn when his friend the electrical engineer came by.
"Guess what just happened to me!" exclaimed the elec. engineer. "I was out in front of my house when a beautiful woman rode up on a bicycle. She got off the bike, took off ALL her clothes, lay down on the lawn, and said to me, ' Take what you want!'
The mech. engineer nodded in approval, "Good choice, I would have chosen the bicycle too: her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway!"
ok, speaking of lawns....
A man was driving down the road when he saw a huge house up on a hill. On the lawn in front of it were quite a number of women, completely nude, lying on the grass. The man was driving too fast to stop, so at the next gas station he pulled in to ask about what he had seen.
"What's with that house back there, with all the naked women out front?" he asked the gas station manager.
"Oh, that's the retirement home for aging hookers," said the manager. "They're having a yard sale!"
: )
Nancy in NC
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