Circle the wagons ..Please
Jean, I cannot stress enough that you HAVE TO GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE AND DO IT NOW! I have never been with someone that is physically abusive or has the tendancy to be but it is safe to assume that he can snap at the littlest thing. It could be something as simple as the man on the t.v. looked like he was looking wrong. Or that the crack in the sidewalk got bigger. It can take ANYTHING to set this maniac off. I would make sure that a police report is made and I would go to the nearest shelter but tell them that you cannot stay in one close to where he is. They can, I am sure, send you to another one. But please make sure that a police report is made because you need the proof of that to make sure if he does do something to try to get to you they will have proof it was him. Please make sure that you go somewhere. Let the SOB get himself home, it doesn't sound like he would worry if the shoe was on the other foot. You have plenty of offers here. I don't have a extra bedroom but you are more than welcome to come here if you want to. Make sure that everyone knows what he is capable of and why you need to leave. Tell as many people as you can. Even newspapers and/or radio and television stations. That way if something happens to you everyone is going to know who did it. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE AND DO IT NOW. YOU ARE NOT SAFE THERE OR ANYWHERE THAT HE MIGHT KNOW WHERE YOU ARE. I am afraid and can't tell you haul your butt out of there and do it YESTERDAY!!!! Please make sure that you let someone here know what is going on so we will know that you are safe. Have one of your children let us know. Just give them the information for them to get on here if you need to. Please listen to all of us and get out and run like you have never run before. Run like your life depends on it because it just might. I am keeping you in heavy duty prayers and again please let us know you are alright.
BTW~I am very much a dog lover and they will be alright. Just give them food and water and they will survive. I am sure of it. They can survive on their own for several days.
BTW~I am very much a dog lover and they will be alright. Just give them food and water and they will survive. I am sure of it. They can survive on their own for several days.
It's not what you gather, but what you scatter
that tells what kind of life you have lived.
Jean,
Get out, get out, get out. Don't look back. Please!!!!!!
I have always been concerned about you. I don't know everything that has been going on, but I was always wondering how you ended up always having to take care of his mother.
You are really scaring me. I don't have any idea about stuff like this except I watch a lot of true crime shows and this does not sound good.
Please do what everybody says and don't go pick him up. Do not let him try to lure you back by being all nice to you. It may be just that, a lure.
Take care,
Mickey
Get out, get out, get out. Don't look back. Please!!!!!!
I have always been concerned about you. I don't know everything that has been going on, but I was always wondering how you ended up always having to take care of his mother.
You are really scaring me. I don't have any idea about stuff like this except I watch a lot of true crime shows and this does not sound good.
Please do what everybody says and don't go pick him up. Do not let him try to lure you back by being all nice to you. It may be just that, a lure.
Take care,
Mickey
Okay, I'll play the devil's advocate here.
It's common knowledge that a person who stays in this type of relationship does it for several reasons. I would think one of them is the need to be wanted, needed, and loved. You've been afraid of this man for a long time and have taken his mental abuse and still continued on.
So what are you going to do when he comes back, crying that he loves you, says he's sorry and it will change...... a typical abusee will crater and think he means it..... and here we go again. So you don't pick him up..... and it makes him mad..... then what? He finds you in a shelter? He talks you into returning to the fold?
This is probably one of the single-most scary thing you've ever done for you. The first being WLS.
We're so sorry that you have gotten into an abusive situation. You just never know.... and it's happened to a lot of us.
I guess what I'm trying to say is.......if you aren't strong enough to stand your ground and NEVER go back.....don't **** off the pope at this point..... but a few days away would be better than nothing. I agree with everyone else..... GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE but make sure you mean it..... no going back..... no matter the begging. You may even have to find employment in another place..... another town, another State.
I just wish you the best.... and hope you will be safe. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there. Let someone else have the pleasure of his company. You stay safe....but stay that way.
Janet
It's common knowledge that a person who stays in this type of relationship does it for several reasons. I would think one of them is the need to be wanted, needed, and loved. You've been afraid of this man for a long time and have taken his mental abuse and still continued on.
So what are you going to do when he comes back, crying that he loves you, says he's sorry and it will change...... a typical abusee will crater and think he means it..... and here we go again. So you don't pick him up..... and it makes him mad..... then what? He finds you in a shelter? He talks you into returning to the fold?
This is probably one of the single-most scary thing you've ever done for you. The first being WLS.
We're so sorry that you have gotten into an abusive situation. You just never know.... and it's happened to a lot of us.
I guess what I'm trying to say is.......if you aren't strong enough to stand your ground and NEVER go back.....don't **** off the pope at this point..... but a few days away would be better than nothing. I agree with everyone else..... GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE but make sure you mean it..... no going back..... no matter the begging. You may even have to find employment in another place..... another town, another State.
I just wish you the best.... and hope you will be safe. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Hang in there. Let someone else have the pleasure of his company. You stay safe....but stay that way.
Janet
Aloha sweet Jean......and I'm sorry I'm so late posting. My computer has been down all day. I just got on and saw your post and a shiver of fear ran through my body. I am just so THANKFUL THAT YOU DID NOT MARRY THIS CREEP!
You know in your heart of hearts what kind of man he is....and no matter how scary the future looks, it has to be better than being constantly made to feel like a nothing, and always having to walk on eggshells. That is no life!! Please do as the other say and get out immediately....no looking back no matter how contrite he might be (that is the pattern). That's just because he's a big needy zero......and you no longer need to pump him him to feel like a man.
You have so much support right here. PLEASE listen to these wise women....especially the ones who have been through something like this. And...my last suggestion is to find a good therapist and work this through. An abusive relationship is very complicated and cannot just be forgotten. It will affect every aspect of your life from here on unless you deal with it openly and honestly with a good therapist. But first is your safety. DO NOT SEE HIM AGAIN!! Cut the cord cleanly, my dear sister. We are afraid for you. Run....run away now!
Aloha nui loa,
Maui Karen
You know in your heart of hearts what kind of man he is....and no matter how scary the future looks, it has to be better than being constantly made to feel like a nothing, and always having to walk on eggshells. That is no life!! Please do as the other say and get out immediately....no looking back no matter how contrite he might be (that is the pattern). That's just because he's a big needy zero......and you no longer need to pump him him to feel like a man.
You have so much support right here. PLEASE listen to these wise women....especially the ones who have been through something like this. And...my last suggestion is to find a good therapist and work this through. An abusive relationship is very complicated and cannot just be forgotten. It will affect every aspect of your life from here on unless you deal with it openly and honestly with a good therapist. But first is your safety. DO NOT SEE HIM AGAIN!! Cut the cord cleanly, my dear sister. We are afraid for you. Run....run away now!
Aloha nui loa,
Maui Karen
Jean,
Get out I know everyone has said this and it is true. Just think of all of us behind you and protecting you with our prayers.
I volunteered at a Womens Shelter here in Washington awhile back. The staff there would help with the Restraining Orders, etc. Also, if need be they would transfer the women to other shelters farther away. It was kind of like the Underground Railroad. We had a woman and her 2 kids come from all the way from the East Coast . She went from shelter to shelter across the United States. She was one brave woman!
My own daughter had to go to a shelter several times before she could find a way to get a divorce. She couldn't come to me because I was the first place he looked.
Take care and God Speed
Get out I know everyone has said this and it is true. Just think of all of us behind you and protecting you with our prayers.
I volunteered at a Womens Shelter here in Washington awhile back. The staff there would help with the Restraining Orders, etc. Also, if need be they would transfer the women to other shelters farther away. It was kind of like the Underground Railroad. We had a woman and her 2 kids come from all the way from the East Coast . She went from shelter to shelter across the United States. She was one brave woman!
My own daughter had to go to a shelter several times before she could find a way to get a divorce. She couldn't come to me because I was the first place he looked.
Take care and God Speed
My dear lady you need to leave. I was in the same type of relationship back in 1982. I asked the police for help, and their answer was what did I do to make him beat me. Leave now,don't look back. I know it is hard but I know you can see how he is.. Get out of there FAST.........
I am praying for you .
I am praying for you .
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