When supportive friends become non-supportive

Has anyone faced this issue? Friends support the decision for WLS and offer lots of praise for weight loss and working out. But when we go out to dinner, some of mine expect me to pay for  athird of the meal (if there are three of us sharing) when I eat two cubes of steak and a bit of hommus.  They each had a shish-kabob, rice, sauteed mushrooms, and coffee. I like to go out because it is a social activity but I can't afford to pay $15 for what I had!  Am  I being really petty?

Personally, I would just let them know that you will be going dutch treat and paying for your own. That way you are going to be paying for what you get and not what everyone else gets. It can get expensive doing that. If you make it know that is what you would prefer that should clear up that problem. That is the only thing I know what to do and not be nasty about the whole thing.

always go dutch, it saves freindships and arguments with family also.

I agree with Brenda and Darlene, I always go dutch!!!!!. Carla

That's not petty, that is smart. If they are true friends you can explain in advance that you want to change the way of eating/paying. Order your own meal, ask for seperate checks, eat what you want, and take the rest home. It might not have entered their mind that this was a problem.  My friend and I go out for lunch every week but always ask the waitress to give us each a check when we first place our order. That saves us trying to tally up who had what. I don't want to pay for her glass of wine, appetizer, meal, PLUS dessert.

Thanks, Annette. I try to order off appetizers.  I do have one friend who always shares and won't accept any money when we do.  The socialization is important.

Socialization is important but when you are a WLS baby, you have to set the rules...things are just different!!  I started out letting my friends know I'd love to join them for dinner but probably would only get the soup and going dutch.  Now if someone in the group wants to split something, I"ll do that occasionally and split the tab but most of the time, I'll just order my own little meal... and let them do their own thing.  Yep.  It's Dutch treat.  All the way.... and yanno, they may find out they don't want to eat nearly as much if they are having to pay their own way.   Just let them know that your diet is different.. or... find a new set of dinner friends!! Janet

Or you could always leave without paying. Sorry Janet, I couldn't resist.  LOL

I've never liked splitting checks.  It seems like when you split, more drinks and desserts are ordered.  It just causes hard feelings eventually.

Yes...we always pay separately. I explained that to them (about my eating) right before I had the surgery. No hard feeling...everyone agreed and we never have had an issue.  Good friends won't have a problem with this. Good luck. Hugs, connie d