Please Help...I'm Afraid of Maintenance

The good news is that I've reached my goal weight! The bad news is that I've been fearing this moment for months. This is my second round of losing 100+ pounds and I definitely don't want to regain it this time. First time I was 40, I'm now 56 and have had the RNY to help (10/21/07). My goals from the beginning of this journey were to get my life back by also having a total hip replacement since I had been in chronic pain for 3.5 years and barely able to walk. It's now been 8 weeks since my hip replacement and I feel WONDERFUL! I'm returning to work on Monday at my goal weight and able to exercise again. These two surgeries have given me my life back and I'm totally grateful. My problem is my head. I don't want to lose additional weight. My goal from the beginning was to weigh between 155-160 (I'm 5'8"). I'm now 156.5 and afraid to add the additional calories to maintain. I really don't want to continue losing and get "too thin". I've asked many people (my NUT, my support group leader etc.) how to maintain and they all tell me to add additional calories. I understand that, duh??? I believe that adding good "fat" to my diet would be an excellent way of adding the extra calories needed (nuts, avocado etc). My problem is that I'm afraid that if I start eating more calories and the scale starts going up that I won't be able to regain the momentum I currently have to get back on the wagon. I don't see support group for people who want to maintain. It seems like the graduate page is for people that are out over 1 yr. I love this Over Fifty Forum and all of you that post regularly. My body feels wonderful, but the brain is truly afraid. Suggestions would be wonderful. Thank you all for being here with my morning coffee. love to you all. Kathie from California RNY 10/21/07 - weight 260 Hip replacement 5/23/08 - weight 174 Goal - 155-160 lbs. Current weight - 156.5 Height - 5'8"

Hey There, My question is this - are you sure you will continue to lose weight if you continue your current eating plan? I know for me, I have lost 120lbs and I now weight 123lbs (I am 5'3") so I am very happy with my weight.  I am a size four - wearing smalls and extra smalls...   But... I have not changed my eating habits at all.  I currently eat about 1200 (I document my calories everyday on www.fitday.com) and I have not lost any more weight. As a matter of fact, I read that there is a new study that finds that those people who have dieted (a few times) and lost weight tend to become more efficient with their calories (need fewer than "normal" to survive) and therefore tend to gain more easily.  For  me, I can tell you its true.   I realize that this probably is not much help, but this is the story of my maintenance so it's the best I can offer. Lou

Kathie, congrats on reaching goal.  What I've read is to start by adding 100 calories to your daily total.  If you still lose weight, then add another 100 the next wee****il you stabelize.  I'm constantly fighting regain.  My problem is that I'm not good about tracking my calories anymore.  I know that I'm eating way too much.   Wanda

Kathie, CONGRATULATIONS!! At goal and pain free sounds perfect. For me, maintenance has been the most frightening and difficult part of WLS. When adding more calories, you will be adding very small increments until you figure out if that is too much or too little.  My method was to oh so slightly increase the portions. For example, instead of 1/4 cup of cottage cheese, I increased it to 1/3 cup. My pouch doesn't hold much and adding ANYTHING is scarey in my brain.   That didn't seem to help so I added an extra mini meal. The weight loss is getting more stable but it drives me NUTS!!  I am probably a horrible example of maintaining but sure can understand your fears 100 %.  This is all part of our learning process and we will succeed!!!  You are not alone and there are a few of us at the same point. Annette

Hello Kathie.....I think maintaining is alot harder then it sounds.  I so don't want to mess this up.  I still journal my food, get all my protein, water, vitamins, and calcium in as directed by my surgeon.  The head hunger isn't bad but I have been told it will get worse as time goes by....I am praying that isn't so. Good luck to you....if you find the secret to maintaining please let me know!! Hugs, connie d

Look at your face and you will know......I am 5'8" tall and weigh 200 pounds[never been to onerland]......but I am happy and healthy....just eat healthy and don't try to lose more....you can do it....exercise is the answer.....keep it up...especially with a hip replacement..... Sizes mean NOTHING...it is all in how you look and feel....I go up and down stairs now and no one feels they need to "protect" me anymore....I am just a regular person. I wear a size 16-18...and an large to XL top...I am happy with my weight.....my face has finally filled back out and I don't look my age of 67 years old....at least that is what everyone tells me...I am proud of my journey....and I love the Phoenix necklace that Diane sent me and wear it all the time to remind me of how far I have come. Good luck, Marti

Hi Kathy, Boy, are you feeling everything anyone feels when they make goal. We're so in tuned with losing, and for some of us it is the first time EVER we've been in a healthy weight range, we're scared to death  of gaining so we're even more scared of adding calories. I think one of the keys is to have PLANNED snacks. Just the addition of some cheese and crackers, a 1/2 PB&J  or an apple w/peanut butter will be a good way of easing into the idea of eating more. Like someone said, adding a few more calories at a time until you find your "sweet" numbers is the best bet. My Nut told me to increase the carbs I eat, which has helped me a lot. Sometimes I'll have a 1/2 baked potato with some shredded cheese as a snack or some microwave lite popcorn. This is when things get more challenging, IMO, but you can do it.  We're here for ya! Take care

Thank all of you for your support. It's very comforting knowing that there are people out there that are able to understand my fears. I told my husband that I wish I could lose 25 pounds for him since I'm on a roll right now. Unfortunately, it truly scares me to increase my calories. I will continue to use this tool (WLS) to help me reach my real goal (to get away from my yo-yo dieting). It will be tough adding those extra calories to maintain. Since my early 20's my weight has gone up and down many times and I've reached my goal weight twice with Weigh****chers, once with Overeaters Anonymous, once on my own (liquid diet). I couldn't go through this again and now with age and joint problems I'm determined to keep it off. It is a little discouraging reading people's posts that after WLS who have gained weight. I would love to be the same size (currently size 8-10, down from size 22) from one season to the next. My problem continues to be my brain. Although I don't post often, I'll continue to monitor this forum for support, knowing that other people are out there with their struggles and concerns. You are all awesome and just knowing you are there will help me stay on track as I go through this transition of trying to add additional calories to my food plan. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Life is amazing. I'm off to Minnesota on Thursday to spend a long weekend with my grandchildren who are having birthdays this week (4 and 2). I hope to inspire my son who is extremely obese (about 400 lbs). He's amazing, teaching law school, and devoted to his family. He'll be 34 in August and I want him to have a long life with his family. All I can be is an example to him, hoping he'll ask some questions about my WLS. They were here in January and he didn't ask me a single question nor even mention my weight loss. Thanks again to all of you. Kathie (hip) from Castaic, California