How Linda's post personally impacted me

Feel the fear and do it anyway!

I love this. Think I may adopt it as my new motto if you don't mind. So much of my (our) life is stuck because of fear. Perhaps it's time to embrace it and see the transformation on the other side.

I love it too!!! I can't take credit for it though... there's a book by that name! No doubt available at the library. A very worthwhile read about exactly what you described. :)

And having it as your motto? Yes!! I love it! So empowering. :)

Well, I wish you all the best this coming weekend. Sometimes people can be challenging. You are a strong woman though. I know you will come out of this even stronger.

Barb

Thanks Barb! Yes... people and relationships can be challenging. Especially the ones that feel like family!!! I'll have to take an extra dose of non-judgment before I head out and remind myself where everyone is coming from. :)

I have some people like this...not many but when the pipe up and say something derogatory I will respond with.

"It's not about what you think, it's about what I think and guess what? I have mobility back, I have activities I had to forfiet before back, I am more active, I can breath, I can walk/run, I can reach places I have not in years and oh guess what? I am off all the meds I used to have to take for diabetes, Blood Pressure, Cholesterol, Pain killers. So how you doing?"

LOL, Basically I have become less sensitive to what others think. I am alive and I plan to be here for a long time to come now because of this life changing procedure.

I hit 281lbs this morning. Like holly crap... :-) From 404lbs, I can't think of one negative about that. I still eat foods I love, just in moderation, I regularly pass on foods I know are empty calories, so what. I enjoy the new foods as a result of this procedure. Hell, My wife has a new man. What's to complain about :-)

My daughter every odd day will stand in awe and simply say "it's so wierd,,,your're so skinny now" Makes my day every time I hear it.

I smiled the whole way reading through your reply!!! Thanks Wayne. Yeah, this is about me, not them!! And if they want to make it about them, they can take the drastic step I (we all) took to earn the right to make it about them.

When I told one of my friends about my decision to have WLS, i told her "I've decided to do something about my weight once and for all... and I've decided to have the big kahuna". It took her a second, but she's a smart girl, and she said "oh, you mean weight loss surgery?" We had never talked about it, but that's what it is... the big kahuna!! But with any big action comes big reward. Look at you... you're living proof.

Firstly GO YOU! for going through with this difficult surgery and for going through with this (what sounds to be ) potentially difficult conversation.

i must admit i have had a lot of support but my sister, who is a doctor, was very slippery with her downers. she waited till we were all in the car and said,

"well you know, 75% of people who have baratric surgery gain it all back" i was stunned. but its hard to argue with a doctor. everyone thinks she knows best. i just laughed it off and said well i'm the lucky 25% but it hurt. she was trying to cut me down and using her intellect as a weapon.

so i get a sneaky lack of support.

you are better than that. you knew the risks and took a chance and now you are flourishing. i agree with a lot of the comments here. change the subject laugh off the naysayers. stay positive.

you got this

I get it. It's hard when the people closest to us don't support us. My sister is a registered dietitian, and when I first told her I was having surgery, I knew it would be hard for her. It's hard for any sibling/family member medical professionals because of the personal implication. Here's the thing about anyone... people listen to what we're saying, but only so much as it affects them (level 1 listening).

When i told my sis, I could tell she was a little crushed. Like she had failed me as a dietitian. She asked if I had "really tried everything." I could have gotten upset, but it wasn't about that. It was about her in that moment. And I just said I had been thinking about this for a long time, and would need her help after surgery as a dietitian more than I ever have before because it's not a quick fix, it's a whole lifestyle change. She called me later that day and we had a great talk, and she's been learning lots about the Bariatric diet and been super helpful.

I don't know your relationship with your sister but hopefully in some way my story can help. As a doctor, I'm sure her main goal for you is health, and maybe limit your conversations but just focus on that? Something about seeing this as your best chance of getting healthy and not planning to throw it away like that 70% she's referring to, and "hopefully I'll have your support, because one of the best predictors of success is support from family." Then smile and stop talking.

You're doing great and you will be the 30% whether she knows it or not. Sisters eh!

All perfectly wise and valid points thankyou Oneatatime.

it is hard i think she is a bit of a suspicious person my sister doesn't trust anything she hasn't seen with her own two eyes. and any decision i make is IMMEDIATELY suspect. she thinks i am a bit of an airhead and couldn't make a sound decision if walked through it by a professional.

ce la vie. her loss

your sister needs to update her information. that is not what the statistics say statistically most patients will maintain 50% of their weight loss post 10 years. Most being the operative word. Meaning few will regain more than 50% of excess weight. if 75% regained it would not be considered a success and they would likely not being doing it any more (like with the lapband which could be the surgery she is referencing).

Just because she is a doctor does not mean she is knowledgeable about all things medical.