Is it normal to feel a little lost after surgery?

Hey Jennifer,

I just wanted to say that you are not alone. You won't be 'satisfied' by food for quite some time to come. At almost 9 months post-op, food doesn't satisfy me any more... it's simply nutrition and energy to keep me going. It's not comforting or something I particularly look forward to. If this is something that you are struggling with, I would recommend talking to someone about it. As we always say, this surgery helps fix our bodies, but not our minds. Don't hesitate to reach out for help.

Nothing tastes good anymore because your stomach has been cut. Nerves have been severed. You cannot feel any of the sensations around eating that you used to feel and you may never have those feelings again. Everyone is different. Food isn't supposed to be pleasurable, it's merely sustenance at the moment. So just hang in there. It DOES get better.

At 3.5 days post-op, you WILL feel tired. This is normal. You didn't expect to feel tired? Oh gosh, yes! I was tired and napped for the first 10 days or so post-op. It took me two full weeks to feel "normal" again and have some energy back. Don't push yourself too far. Nap when you feel the need.

For those first days/week, I focussed on sipping. Water, water, water. Hydration is the BIGGEST problem in the immediate days post-op. Don't worry about protein yet. Focus on WATER. Get your fluids in and when you can do that, you will be able to get yourself on track with proteins too (liquid at first and transitioning as appropriate).

As for getting your dog on Friday, I think it'd be good for you to have your cherished pet around while you recuperate. Are you the only one taking care of her? How often would you want/need to walk her? For how long? Is she a large breed or small? Does she need to be lifted? Does she sleep on your bed or against you or rather somewhere else (e.g., floor, dog bed)? Answering those questions may help you or us figure out how best to advise you in your course of action. You said "I am just worried I am not physically able to give her what she needs." What would that be exactly... what does she need that you cannot give her? Those are the questions that need answering first. And then you can make some decisions.

Keep us posted. And yes, it WILL GET BETTER. One day at a time. Around day 5-6 you will see a big improvement I suspect.

Thank you Jiliana! 

Your post helped a lot... I did however honestly think that one day, I would be able to enjoy eating and food, just in smaller portions, that is what I had hoped...

I am getting in my water, slowly but surely :) protein hasn't even made its way into my daily diet much yet, just trying to stay hydrated and get cream soups down, as that is what I seem to be able to tolerate at this point.

My dog is a larger breed, a basset, and what I mean by physically give her what she needs, is that I am so tired and busy napping, and she is used to many walks throughout the day, and me playing with her, as I work form home, but right now, I will definitely not be able to give her that amount of attention and activity. But I do think having her around may help me... I miss her. I have decided I will pick her up tomorrow.

Thanks again, I know it will get better, I was just having an off day.

welcome to the bench girl!  The first week after surgery you think...what the 'h' have I done, this is awful, no fun at all, why are all those people posting all those happy thoughts on the forum????  

Then as each couple of hours goes by you start to begin to feel just a bit better, as each day goes by, you feel more normal then a month passes and you forget how awful that first week was.  We all have to get through it.  Put all your efforts into getting  fluids in, moving around and yes, coming to grips with the mental brick wall you have hit on the emotion and physical needs that have been up to now satisfied by food.  This is where the real work will come in the long run, for the rest of your life, now best to keep the mental hunger satisfied and examine the monster.

You will be all good, and getting your little hound on Friday will be part of getting back to normal, he/she will sense you need some puppy lov'n and will fill up some of that emotional space you have left behind in surgery.

Best reply  made me smile, and I needed that! Can't wait to get my doggie tomorrow, and have some cuddles :) Thank you so much for showing that light at the end of the tunnel that sometimes we need reminding of.

I still feel a great loss as food doesn't taste as good as I expect it to taste. But I try and remember that is part of keeping those extra tasty foods out of my mouth forever!  If it doesn't taste very good it isn't worth the calories!

It took me a full 2 weeks to feel decent but I was able to get my kids up for school and then come home and rest!  At 3 weeks out they took me off my blood pressure meds as my pressures were so low and that was part of why I was so tired!  Maybe you can check your blood pressure if you are on meds!

Work on the head parts everyday.  This is part of the process, changing your thoughts about food.

Thank you! My blood pressure is pretty near perfect... This isn't easy, I am learning a whole new way with food. Eventually I will get there.

Thanks for the kind words!

I think what you're feeling is very normal.  I agree with others who've said every day makes a difference.  I remember saying to my husband that I almost felt human again on about the 10th day. (I too had two surgeries, an emergency one the day after RNY.) So hang in there.  There is a light at the end of the tunnel.  You do need to find other things that give you pleasure besides eating; once you're strong enough maybe research some things you'd like to do from reading to crafts any everything else.  If you could leave your dog for a few days more, it might be best.  I know my dog still is bewildered as to why I won't let him jump up on my lap:)

I'm looking into yoga once i am cleared for exercise... I'll have to research how long that might be, and check with them at my one month appointments.  I think bringing her home will help overall. Shes been gone five days now! I am going to get her tomorrow, and do my best. Luckily she does not jump on my lap, seeing as she is 55lbs.

There are huge changes going through your body right now, all of which also affect your mental state. My body was confused, my mind was a little confused too for the first week or so. It's normal.

With respect to the eating: Yes, food will hold no appeal to you for the most part for a while. Same with drinking anything. To help me through this I locked a thought in my mind and reminded myself of it constantly: Eating/drinking/meds are my full-time job right now. I need to do these things to get well.

You WILL feel well again. You've just had major surgery - give your body some time to heal. You'll be amazed at how much better you'll feel at 1 week post-op as compared to today. It just takes time.

Walk when you can, rest when you need to, sip water constantly. I know your "head isn't in the game" right now, but it will come.

I think you'll feel quite a lot better once your dog is back home with you. He'll give you a reason to "get up and go" AND it will be some company for you. Maybe invite a friend over to your place for a coffee and to "just hang out and chat"?

Hang in there - you're doing great.

Karen xo

Hi.  I am just over two weeks post op.  I feel amazing.  Yes the first few days were tough and yes I felt little energy but totally normal.

Each day is better and better.  And yes I am sure you are getting tired of liquids.  But just think of this being a blip of time in your life.

Soon you will be back to eating normally (just smaller portions) and food hopefully will not be the centre of all of life.  

I am on creamy soups and yogurt now and still struggling to get my liquids and protein in but that is my job right now.  I have lost 36 lbs.

It is worth it....all worth it.  Hang in there!!!!