Dating after surgery

I am DYING laughing that you advise masturbation prior to a date. Ever see "There's Something About Mary"?

HI ya Zizzler

I'm been on a few dating sites over the years so I can give you some advice. Totally up to you if you want to take it

Picture? Optional. Why? Personally I like to choose who gets to see my face. On almost any dating site, your pictures can be "saved" to someone else's computer and you have no idea what they are going to do with them. Some sites have the option of allowing you to"show' your pic to someone and then taking back that privilege.  If you chat to someone for a while and you like them? Offer to show them your picture some other way ie email (You can set up an email account just for dating site responses if you want. This also allows you to screen but don't use your name. Use "Doglover21@ whatever" or something like that)

Chat to them for a while. ie a couple of weeks at least. See if they have qualities you are seeking. You can get all kinds of info from people and don't let yourself be pushed. If something doesn't feel right? GO with it. It's your instinct kicking in.

Set up a criteria list of what you want in a man. Think of it logically (and not with your hormones leading the way lol ) Employed, lives/does not live in mother's basement, has children, doesn't want children, social, racist? woman-hater? complains about his ex all the time? (if he constantly puts women down chances are he's not what you want) Play sports? controlling? too amorous right away? does he drink often? smoke?

Married men. Lots of them on these sites. Screen carefully. Most humans these days have only cells. So can you call him at any time of the day? Literally at 11 at nite? Is he secretive about where he lives? Does he have a car seat in the back? lol.Does he introduce you to his friends?. You will pick up vibes if he's not being honest and if you do sense something, LISTEN to it. Even if it doesn't make sense. It's your instinct talking

Look after yourself before you go on a date (masturbate) If you meet a really hot guy and your libido is rampaging through your body, you'll have a better chance of maintaining yourself and asking intelligent questions. And not having to worry about birth control OR std's. Sex is actually something you should talk about. You need to know whether he practises safe sex etc. Some diseases do keep giving back

Give him only your cell phone number until you know him better. Safety reasons :) If you call him from your homeline, he can track you down to your home address. YOU decide who gets to know where you live.

Meet in public at a Starbucks or somewhere that there are lots of people. Do not go to his home or invite him to yours.  Anyone can say anything about themselves on the net. Dating sites are notorious for this.

Yes it's a lot but it's called being safe. not paranoid.  It's quite ok to "ogle" and "spy" online to see what you want.

Have fun but please be safe!!!

Mermaidz, I'm with you 100%! I know people who have done online dating and did it that way. No pic posted but sent via email after communicating with someone for a while. Back in 2004, all of the young single women on my campus (small campus, only about 20 of us women at the time) decided to all join match.com (I remember it being really popular at the time), and out of the 14 women who joined, 11 met the loves of their lives and are still married and have had children. Most did not post pix for fear of being seen by coworkers and sent pix via email. I'm sure there are people out there who are atill fine with that, maybe not the majority, but some. Try it and see how it goes, and take it from there.