Dating after surgery

Ok so I have not been in a relationship for about 7 years now and I have been very content not to go there, mostly not interested at all.  I find that my feelings have changed since surgery 9 weeks ago and I am open to the possibility of a romantic relationship. Is it too soon to start dating?  Has anyone been through this?  If so, what did you do?  I read somewhere that you should wait one year before dating but at 39 my biological clock is going crazy!  I only have a few more years of possible baby-making potential and I want to make sure I use those years as wisely as possible.  I have been thinking of doing online dating but am scared to post a picture.  What if someone I know sees it - like an ex-bf or my boss or coworker?  Plus not sure what to say as I have only been on 2 dates in the past 7 years! Anyone have the experience of increased interest in a romantic relationship after surgery?  I feel like a ball of hormones!

First of all, who cares if someone sees you on a dating site.  It's not illegal and tons of single people use them since that seems to be the new way to meet people. I dated pre op and post op and never let my weight ever get in the way of my dating life.  I met my present guy 2 months before WLS and we dated a bit and then I told him that I wanted a year to myself to work on WLS and that I didn't have time for him and living with WLS so we decided to meet back in a year again. We talked on the phone a bit for that year but nothing like we had when we dated a bit before the surgery.  A year later we met back up, I wasn't at goal but close and we have been together since.  

Only advice since you are hormonal, you will also be potentially very fertile. Don't rely on just one method of birth control.  I was 39 as well but had already had a child and definitely didn't want another so had my tubes tied but if you do want kids, you do not want to have a child from a new relationship or date or whatever you want to call it when it's so new.  Being tied down with a child too early into dating can cause some men to run and run fast so be careful with the birth control.  

I wouldn't say don't date if you want to.  I knew I didn't want to for that year and opted to not date but it was my personal choice.  Thinking back I could have easily dated him and dealt with WLS life but don't regret my choice not to.  Only you can decide if you have room in your life for it all right now.  I was also a divorced mom and had my son to think about so that added another thing I had to include into that year and for me my son and my surgery took precedence to a new relationship.  I say if you feel ready, you feel it wont' interfere with your new WLS life then go for it and to hell with who may or may not see you on a dating site.  I never give a **** what others think of what I am doing as long as I am happy with my choices.

Thank you for your reply, I really appreciate it.  I admire you so much for just doing what you feel is right and not giving a ****  Wish I could do that, but am finding it hard to step outside of my comfort zone.  I have been socializing more in general, but that is because I feel like doing stuff, have more energy.  I agree totally about the birth control and will be using an additional method if that ever comes up.  I am not sure I want kids at all but definitely do not want any surprises.  If you had an online dating ad would you add a photo or not?  I have heard that people who add a photo to their ad get like 15 times more replies, but to me I feel just too exposed by it. Right now I have an ad but it has not photo, just so I can look around and see what is happening in online dating. 

I've never had an ad but really I think I'd post a pic.  Most people want to see who they are talking to.  I know a lot of sites let you have backstage pics or something like that and you just send them to whoever you want to but I would think if you are in a big city where there are lots and lots of ads, I'd post a pic or you will not get any hits at all.  Smaller towns you could get away with no pic and just send as you want as the pickings are a lot slimmer.

I think you are totally right about the photo issue but I am not sure I have the balls to do it.  I do have an ad now but there is no photo, and it is just so that I can lurk around creepily and see what is out there. But if everyone does this then things will go nowhere right?  Also I do not have any recent photos of myself to post, and if I do I may look different in a few months and have to re-take them.  I was thinking of posting a pic where I am wearing sunglasses so I am less exposed, but is that too ridiculous?

I'm for full disclosure. Like my photo? Great, maybe I like yours too. That's a starting point. I wouldn't want ANY surprises if I decided to grab coffee with someone.

I totally agree. When I was doing the online thing I always had a face shot and full body shot- no matter my size. I wanted them to know what I looked like. And I always wanted recent shots of those I dated. Twice I was given old photos and it made me mad. I probably would have gone out with them anyway but I could not get over the deception.

Makes you wonder what else they'd be deceptive about, doesn't it. Anytime we enter into a relationship of any sort we're basically saying, "Well, here I am. This is me. Take it or leave it." Being up-front and honest can only help to sort out the potentials from the no-thank-yous.

K.

There is no need to post a pic if you are uncomfortable doing so. The people you connect with can request one via email at a later time. Also, many actors have admitted to meeting their significant others on dating websites and not posting a pic on their profile in an effort to find someone who was really seeking a serious relationship other than being overly concerned with physical looks. 

Many actors like who? I've never heard of a celebrity online dating romance, curious.